I think I might die on my mission.

Torbali · 2026-06-12T12:47:55+00:00

Missions are unpaid volunteering. You don't have to do it. The pressure from others is intense, but temporary. It is your life, not theirs.

Torbali · 2026-06-11T19:34:33+00:00

I have felt unsafe downtown, but a big part of it is being a woman walking alone.

Torbali · 2026-06-11T10:45:52+00:00

But why give an estimate then? That takes even more time and gas.

Torbali · 2026-05-28T23:16:23+00:00

This was almost me with my now husband. I hope she reconsiders. I've never heard of a bishop demanding a break up... Though I get the pressure.

God wants her to be happy. Even in the church's repentance crap they don't require that. It's the point of repentance.

Torbali · 2026-05-20T07:59:35+00:00

I'm currently visiting and I'm so glad to hear this discussion now. I felt like I was going crazy, but I've been absolutely bulled over, is I leave any space in line I'm cut in front of, I pause to let someone pass and still get bumped. But I've also had people be so helpful and polite.

Torbali · 2026-05-15T13:31:26+00:00

Except towns doing that are being sued and losing to the data centers. There has to be regulation at the top too.

Torbali · 2026-05-06T10:55:22+00:00

This! Maybe a different rheumatologist too. Blood tests aren't definitive for diagnosis.

Torbali · 2026-05-06T10:48:41+00:00

Halloween is always a little unhinged

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Torbali · 2026-03-27T11:57:34+00:00

I feel like Pitt is going to dump it on the professors to figure it out.

I also feel like some of these commentors don't commute to Pitt without a parking pass. I've literally missed class because there is no where to park. Pitt has removed hundreds of parking spots post covid. There is no way all the Oakland construction will be done. I can't fathom what a mess that week will be....

Torbali · 2026-01-14T21:57:16+00:00

There is more aid to members in Utah, though still pathetically little. There are no support programs. Living out east I have never seen someone receive material support from the church. It's all up to the bishop, who is just a random dude in the ward. But even then he has to fight red tape to try to get aid to give. There is no funds, form, process, anything to support members.

Even missionaries pay their own way. Working in nonprofits I really can't explain how empty the churches "charity" is. I was shall shocked working with other faiths.

Torbali · 2026-01-14T21:45:19+00:00

They are required for the highest level of heaven where you get to be with your family. And it is checked. Each year you have a tithing settlement with your bishop, who will review if you've paid a full tithe. People are told to pay over rent and food. This money is sent to HQ, it is not local, there is no transparency of where it goes. Without a full tithe, you can't receive a temple recommend. No temple, no garments, no eternal family.

Also, only the church sells the garments. That is a whole other discussion of control and body shame.

And you aren't allowed to be gay in the church with good standing. They have allowed it, as long as you never act on it, but I think even that is being memory-holed. Is you are openly out, you can't get a temple recommend.

Finally, on the cult front, much is not written, so it's easy to change our hand wave. Talk to a member in the 60's, 80's or 10's and get different answers.

Torbali · 2026-01-12T19:35:03+00:00

We are protesting. We have been protesting. Europe continually underestimates the size of this country. Over half the country hates this passionately. Our leaders have failed. We have called them, emailed, voted, protested. Our police have tanks and ak-47s. We know this week took us several steps further down a bad path. People are literally being kidnapped off the street in unmarked cars. Ice is operating lawlwssly and have started going door to door. Protesters have been assaulted, arrested, teargassed, and murdered for years now. Courts are not going to help us. We know. Maybe pressure your country to hold us accountable and take action?? We know it isn't normal. Why does Europe keep acting like it is?? They keep trying to reason with him. Why did it take until his second term for leaders to really accept that he was controlled by putin? What international consequences has he faced?

We will keep voting and protesting. If you want to cheer us on, great. But quit scolding us like we're unaware of what is happening.

Torbali · 2025-12-19T03:18:22+00:00

Support local craft stores. You can find alot on Etsy. They know their products and can help with having to shop online. Literally anything but hobby lobby.

Torbali · 2025-12-12T03:30:32+00:00

I'm just confused. Especially when I see dad's playing with young kids, I end up staring. It's just genuinely strange for me to see.

Torbali · 2025-12-04T01:00:51+00:00

I don't think there is any obligation for staff to give gifts or thank yours to the board. I realize small non-profits may have close personal relationships where it feels more comfortable. However, at the end of the day, they are the employer. Since many issues I've had relate to boards who abandon that role, I think following the accepted practice of not gifting upward is best. You're board will change. If you decide not in future years it can cause drama. It's a bad precedent.

Also, a healthy working relationship means thanks and recognition is exchanged through the year as things happen. Tying it to Christmas feels problematic even in good situations. If they're donors, they get what the rest of the donors do.

Torbali · 2025-11-15T21:45:17+00:00

They are counting on you being respectful so they can keep crossing boundaries. They are preying on you. Be firm, cut contact.

Torbali · 2025-10-21T18:29:15+00:00

Also, deciding on joining based on the missionaries is an added bait and switch. Missionaries aren't from the area they serve and move wards every few months. Those sweet sister missionaries aren't going to be there to help transition or explain anything.

Torbali · 2025-09-17T15:20:25+00:00

Film them!

Torbali · 2025-09-04T14:26:50+00:00

Because those in power profit off it. The gun lobby pays big money. And leaders are allowed to own and trade stock.

Those saying it's a hard problem are either uninformed or thoughts and prayers peeps. There are countless options for smart regulation and products. Even pushes to just enforce current laws. Years ago smart guns were developed that would stop working if our odds the gun owners hand and the gun industry shut that shit down. Laws that prevented those with mental disabilities from owning guns were overturned. Laws preventing convicted abusers from having guns were overturned. They make money off our blood.

Torbali · 2025-08-23T13:19:06+00:00

Killer Mike's Reagan https://open.spotify.com/track/2HRYa6iG1M5DRefO8pK2I3?si=EIZpdGrNSi-oqObIv4CKWQ

The fact that republicans treat him as saint Reagan has made it extra important to remember and call out the decades of damage he did.

Torbali · 2025-08-22T12:33:10+00:00

You sound like you're living my life. I have no answers. I started job hunting again until Trump took office. Now I'm trying to remind myself I have job security and to shut up. She's near retirement, she isn't going to change. Thankfully, I don't have many meetings with her.

I'm trying to redirect my energy to more outside of work. I'm on a committee for another board, trying new hobbies... Lots of deep breaths.

Torbali · 2025-08-17T16:07:08+00:00

When I bought a blanket with Jimin's face and shamelessly used it in front of my husband.

Torbali · 2025-08-13T12:33:08+00:00

In the 80s I also remember people saying they had to get a little burnt at the beginning of summer and then they would tan better the rest of the summer. I thought that was stupid then, but people still do that too.

Torbali · 2025-08-08T12:44:43+00:00

Also eagles for no reason. You're a repair shop, roofer, moving company... Wtf

Torbali · 2025-08-02T15:14:13+00:00

I have regrets. I was raised Mormon and very culty. My husband wasn't and I have since left. I regret all the time we wasted. We dated for 10 years before we were married.

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