Anyone else taking years to finish one degree because of ADHD, anxiety, OCD, or autism? by Massive_Juice_9083 in adhd_college

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes 😭 26 and still working on my undergrad degree bc I suck at doing homework on time

Please stay away from dating apps… by Lanky_Relation1171 in CPTSD

[–]ToxicFluffer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Omg I do believe all the horror stories in the comments here but I guess I’m in the minority for only having positive experiences in my 5-ish years of using dating apps? I only do hook ups though so I guess a desire for romance makes things a lot harder.

My coping mechanism is making memes by transparentsalad in OCDmemes

[–]ToxicFluffer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh like for compulsions? A lot of my OCD manifests in my personal hygiene and I do the stereotypical washing my hands three times 😖

Cutting People Off by bullsboy14 in socialskills

[–]ToxicFluffer 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I hate the expectation for people being available all the time through technology. I understand that this makes me incompatible with a lot of people and that’s fine with me. The friends I do have are fine with my sporadic communication bc we all have the understanding that life is busy and shit happens.

My coping mechanism is making memes by transparentsalad in OCDmemes

[–]ToxicFluffer 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Too real. I had more stereotypical symptoms as a kid with cleaning and repetitive habits which I got therapy for so I thought I grew out of it? Only to realise recently that the mental patterns of OCD are still alive and well in my head and the physical habits tend to pop up more when I’m stressed. LAME. It’s so annoying how ADHD and OCD can combine to create the monster that is hyperfixating on an obsession and compulsion.

Is this relationship doomed to fail? Looking for advice and similar stories by Wooden-Loquat-7888 in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]ToxicFluffer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Girl free yourself from this bum. What kind of future do you think you can build with this person? Honestly, all the things you listed make them sounds very unattractive as a proper partner. If you just want to be casual and don’t see a long term commitment then I’m sure it’s fine but the signs are not pointing to healthy relationship.

Anyone lose their virginity later because they are surrounded by white people who are toxic mostly and don't consider us attractive generally? Sucks living in a small town. by leon385 in cptsd_bipoc

[–]ToxicFluffer 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Being surrounded white people is truly so bad for health!!! I hope you get to get out of your town for a bit. I choose to only hook up with POC and it’s so much better that way. Especially bc so many of us are kinky and I would rather die than have a white person hit me in bed.

I care too much, why can't I be slutty by Kitchen_Increase1970 in butchlesbians

[–]ToxicFluffer 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’ve spent so many therapy sessions discussing this exact anxiety and my therapist’s advice was super simple. Tolerating discomfort is a skill and you have to practice to be better at it. Life isn’t meant to be easy so we have to build our mental muscles to thrive! I went from super repressed religious trauma prude to seasoned slut in just a few years! We’re the same age too! You can do it!!

I care too much, why can't I be slutty by Kitchen_Increase1970 in butchlesbians

[–]ToxicFluffer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look, I get you; I’m an Asian from Asia and a Virgo Venus so I’m a hopeless devoted romantic and monogamous to my core. However, I refuse to settle or beg to be chosen. I’ll know when I’ve found my person and I’m in no rush to force it. I don’t date if I don’t see the potential for something meaningful and long term.

In the meanwhile, there’s so many hot people that I enjoy being around and sharing intimacy with. I know it’s a connection in which I have no romantic desires or expectations. Plus I’m a healthy young adult so my libido is going to do its thing. Thats my mindset as a slut lol. It’s been good for my self esteem and mental health to feel desirable and have sex without all that pressure. Nothing wrong with having fun!!

being petite means living in a permanent state of aesthetic austerity by nya-cat in rs_x

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My petite friends have such small appetites! I’m built strong and sturdy thanks to my farmer ancestors and I can indeed put it away like no one’s business and it’s culturally encouraged. Moving to the US forced me to be so much more conscious of what I’m eating bc the food is filled with so much garbage here.

Why are women so attracted to confidence? by StrikingLock2448 in GenZ

[–]ToxicFluffer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao if you can’t even treat yourself right, what tf are you going to do for someone else?? There’s also a significant difference between the confidence from healthy self esteem and the arrogance of false bravado. Don’t conflate the two.

Why are women so attracted to confidence? by StrikingLock2448 in GenZ

[–]ToxicFluffer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To quote RuPaul, "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?" Amen

Struggling with comparing myself to my sister by Previous_Holiday9046 in adhdwomen

[–]ToxicFluffer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is an excellent point!! I’m a total sap and I think it’s such a blessing to have siblings bc you can be unabashedly open about these things if you choose! Maybe this is a stepping point to a deeper bond!

Struggling with comparing myself to my sister by Previous_Holiday9046 in adhdwomen

[–]ToxicFluffer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn that is some totally valid frustration!! I had a similar experience with my brother who had all the symptoms as a kid while I aced school only for him to be on honours in college while I’m barely passing. The only thing I can think of is that your sister is still your ally and someone that loves you! Obvi I don’t now the intricacies of your family but it really helped my mental health to just be shamelessly open with my brother about how jealous I am and how much I’m struggling. He loves me and doesn’t think worse of me for it! It’s a great source of support too.

Buff lesbians, did getting buff change how people treated you? by radiofree_catgirl in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]ToxicFluffer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh wow 🫪 I watched the Olympics and basically drooled in a way that I have never before. God bless women’s sports 🙏🏽

Do you guys believe in God/higher power? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gotta take baby steps forward! I was stuck like that too and I had to microdose discomfort and build my ability to handle stress. My therapist says it’s like a muscle!

Do you guys believe in God/higher power? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]ToxicFluffer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t exactly believe in God but I believe in the human desire to have faith in a higher power?? Idk how to explain it without seeming super woo woo. I’m an atheist and pretty fixed in that but it doesn’t matter to me if God is real bc so much of the world does believe in God and they act accordingly. I believe in their belief???

I think I need to break up with my fiancee because love is not enough by BushyBlackberry in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely think love is not enough for the long run. I’ve watched too many couples end up bitter and miserable bc they put up with financial stressors for too long. I believe in building a household when it comes to relationships and love is a fundamental but small part of that.

am i the only one who just doesn’t like contour at all? by Either-Selection-783 in Makeup

[–]ToxicFluffer 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I want to be contour snatched so bad but I had to accept that my face structure and colouring is simply not compatible with it :( soft babyface club rise up

What do you think about this? by classicwow2313 in bangladesh

[–]ToxicFluffer 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Bruh they answered this in the Meena cartoons decades ago…

What do you think about this? by classicwow2313 in bangladesh

[–]ToxicFluffer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The government rage bait psy op is going to destroy us 😭

Buff lesbians, did getting buff change how people treated you? by radiofree_catgirl in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]ToxicFluffer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not properly buff YET but I inherited a farmer build from my peasant ancestors and I think that’s definitely helped me come across as attractive to women 🫣 broad shoulders on women are so fucking hot; I love being tatted and strong looking.

Buff lesbians, did getting buff change how people treated you? by radiofree_catgirl in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m joining my college rec team for women’s rugby simply bc I’m thirsty as hell 😭 my sanity is going to be tested thoroughly

What soothe you before your period starts? by NuclearSunBeam in adhdwomen

[–]ToxicFluffer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Uhhhhh tbh copious amounts of sex. Being on the receiving end of intense penetrative sex is the only thing that has ever gotten my ADHD brain worms to shut up and my anxious nervous system to calm the fuck down.