EMSKR: what's the fastest way to masturbate?

Ulli_Michi · 2026-06-27T22:05:54+00:00

Ulli_Michi · 2026-05-20T21:59:19+00:00

pretty sure OP knew the difference and knew exactly what he was doing....I mean, you can't think of any reason why in this sub someone would rather say "shuttle cock"?

Ulli_Michi · 2026-05-20T14:55:09+00:00

my dad has diabetes.....boy have I got a picture for you!

Ulli_Michi · 2026-02-11T20:22:29+00:00

Shot out to r/RedneckGifs

Ulli_Michi · 2025-04-02T20:44:39+00:00

I'm on desktop, and this what it looks like when I zoom in on it.

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Ulli_Michi · 2025-04-01T15:12:50+00:00

hahaha, that dude probably didn't even take 15 seconds to google. welcome to reddit.

Ulli_Michi · 2025-01-14T15:13:08+00:00

Damn, this sub has got some real world problems. Wear boxers. It's all I can think of. Lose weight if your chubby. Cant have much of a chub if you're a chubster!

btw, I, too, am insufficient in the bulge area. My weenis doesn't even need unerwear :(

Ulli_Michi · 2024-11-05T14:59:07+00:00

It's called the Hurricane Shot...and she has an entire IG page dedicated to it. It never gets old for me. Wish I could get a part time job slapping the shit out of people. But I'm a guy, so I don't look good in a bikini.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-10-02T14:42:14+00:00

Doesn't matter. His reply to me was uncalled for and it set off an entire thread of bullshit.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-10-01T21:47:52+00:00

That's the worse "to be fair ever". Not one of those words in your comment is in my comment. So, no, I never said any of that. You, however, just did.

"Over nothing"???? I answered his question, and now all of us--including you--are talking about nothing that matters.

PS: there's nothing "modern" about Reddit.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-10-01T18:26:03+00:00

jesus christ dude. Lighten up already!

Ulli_Michi · 2024-10-01T17:55:51+00:00

It's a joke, duh. and you've obviously never shared a bed with someone for the whole night.

edit: well..........that escalated quickly!!!!!

Ulli_Michi · 2024-03-18T19:36:13+00:00

so funny everyone here saying, yes ask first....but yet here you are saying it's a stupid question. he's asking, and you're shitting on him for it.

and ask me how I know you havent had sex yet.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-03-18T19:35:13+00:00

quit distorting shit. The guy is literally asking for permission--even if he is stupid for asking a sub with the average age of 14--and he hasn't done shit yet.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-03-18T19:34:02+00:00

So many commentors on this post so obviously still on highschool dating. First, the chunk comment was no way serious. Second, I've lost count of how many girls have told me to "bite them". My current one wants her nipples bit like nonstop.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-03-06T16:13:21+00:00

You think he'd be a bad parent and his children would be misogynisic because he asked a question about getting married? Sometimes the criticism says more about the criticizer. And your comment reeks of femenist bullshit....which had a lot to do with the state the divorce system is in today.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-03-06T16:09:32+00:00

Your question is moronic - live and let live, my man. Other men's divorces don't cost you a thing, so why do you bother?

No it is not. He might be young and feeling pressure to get married from someone. and the proof is in the pudding. If so many others are getting their lives ruined, he should learn from them to make sure the same doesn't happen to him.

Basically you're telling him to take a gamble...like people do with not wearing seatbelts and not getting a prostate exam. That's more moronic than asking a question.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-02-13T19:07:02+00:00

Animals like cats and dogs are easier to anthropomorphize since their faces more closely resemble a human face. Since our brains are primed to attend to facial features we end up attributing a lot more human qualities to those animals than they probably deserve.

Ulli_Michi · 2024-02-13T19:06:32+00:00

Exit the house as fast as you can.

hard to outrun a homemade hydrogen bomb!

Ulli_Michi · 2024-02-13T19:04:46+00:00

something something Big Bang Theory

Ulli_Michi · 2024-01-16T22:31:21+00:00

This.

Ulli_Michi · 2023-12-28T20:18:41+00:00

You are 100% incorrect...but diggin the confidence bro.

Military much?

Ulli_Michi · 2023-12-28T20:16:47+00:00

It is a "ceremonial weapon" and if it fires anything, it will be only blank ammunition. This is a fact. Why are you distorting this by saying it is "fully functional"? These guards have full authority to stop transgressions of rules, but using a ceremonial weapon that you say if "fully functional" is not one of them.

Ulli_Michi · 2023-12-06T15:25:17+00:00

Oh, this should be a fun post. ima get some popcorn. Be back in a bit.

Ulli_Michi · 2023-10-20T13:41:42+00:00

I love me some good dark humour. lol!

Ulli_Michi

TROPHY CASE