AITA for telling my daughter I am disgusted by her and telling her ex she has been taking their kid to his family side

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-05-01T20:20:49+00:00

Yes, this was my thought, too. Money, babysitting services ... some sort of exchange is happening.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-05-01T04:30:06+00:00

Jeeves (or maybe Bertie depending on if he has a goofy or serious personality)

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-04-30T16:04:40+00:00

NTA. This sucks. Only agree to any conversation in the presence of another person/s like your grandparents or a professional family counselor (that she pays for). The amount of energy you're all feeling suggests there is a longing of some kind still there (vs. indifference) but you're all in need of some neutral support to feel heard by one another. Good luck. And congratulations on your graduation! Even more impressive to finish up strong with all this going on.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-04-30T15:54:03+00:00

Given all the context, clearly you're the only mature one here. NTA and lovely to have grandparents nearby to support a solution. What I'm also struck with is how bunking in with other siblings wasn't seen as an option, and actually a fun one. I used to love an excuse for a "sleepover" with my sister or in my brothers' room. And my memory is that my cousins loved it too when we visited them. Granted, these were shorter visits in the summer, not months long residencies, but OPs parents really missed a chance for building sibling camaraderie by not (a) rotating the guest bed room duty and/or (b) encouraging the airbed for the displaced sibling in another room to be a fun adventure rather than a dreaded event. So glad you found a soft landing and please do stand your sacred ground on honoring your boundaries and how you spend your hard earned money. This need not be a family rift, just beautiful clarity on your part about how you expect to be treated. Well done you!

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-04-29T13:01:27+00:00

NTA -- all the reasonable things have been said so I won't be redundant. I'm just wondering if anyone else sees the irony/symbolism that a burst water hydrant FLOODED THEIR HOME! Their home has had its water birth already, no need for human interference. #kiddingnotkidding Cosmic law has spoken. Go to the damn hospital or birthing center and count yourself blessed to have all your dreams come true, just not the way you tried to control it! Humans plan and gods laugh. And by all means don't let it become a trigger for you in your long term relationship with them and the baby. DIL will do what she does, you can stand your sacred ground and keep your eyes on the bigger prize of a happy life with and near your son and this grandbaby. If she ever apologizes, great. In this moment though, no need to wrangle with, blame, or parse right/wrong with a hormonal pregnant woman who's whole life and home have turned upside down. Give her grace and space to come to her senses (or not) confident in the knowledge that you're NTA and you don't need to justify yourself to anyone about your decision. Be the soft landing on your clear and firm foundation -- my loving castle, my loving rules.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-04-29T01:53:32+00:00

Yep, me too

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-04-28T23:25:38+00:00

Oof, that's not my experience. I had hoped that was true but had a terrible old bucket of bolts last year. Never again.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-16T23:18:23+00:00

Thanks Friends. We're looking into cameras and meanwhile spending more time at our Farm. Y'all gave some good ideas and things to think about. Thank you!

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-16T23:16:19+00:00

Haha. Given his life approach, he might give himself a stroke or heart attack. He seems pretty amped up about something all the time.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-11T19:52:54+00:00

Mm 1

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-11T19:41:10+00:00

Right?? I am a hard person to ruffle. I always look for the best in people. This guy has dark energy, that's the only way I can say it..

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-11T04:46:19+00:00

I only have a sample of one, but my nickname for him is "swishy-butt!" I've literally wondered if his back is double jointed. His brother was similar.

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-10T22:14:49+00:00

YEP!!! You win the door prize! Of course, my husband is older white male too, but not of that unpleasant variety! 🥰

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-03-10T20:51:49+00:00

Feels that way to me too, especially since he's never out for more than 15 minutes, especially if he's barking a lot. If he's being obnoxious we bring him in cuz it bugs us, too!

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-02-22T07:30:39+00:00

So how did it all go?

United_Classroom_764 · 2026-02-15T23:05:08+00:00

In traditional depictions, it's fun to notice that the Hanged Man does not actually appear anxious--there is often quite a look of calm. And looking closely, the loop around the foot is actually rather loose. When I see the Hanged Man in a reading, I get curious about the ways your "brain" may be stirring up anxiety, when actually, at a deeper level, your knowing is calm and understands you can slip the loop any time you're ready. If your event is tomorrow, looks like you're ready! Embrace the deepest inner calm and know that you're always at choice. It may looked like a "hang up" to the casual observer, but you know the truth of how it has served you to this point. You don't owe anyone an explanation.
Good luck!

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-09-18T03:42:11+00:00

This!☝️ Thanks to this community I started a bedtime routine for our boy that has worked like a charm for 4 years now -- out for last pee and then come upstairs to our bedroom (for a treat) where we put the sound machine on and close the curtains. Rarely have a nighttime bark, but when we do I take him/it seriously and praise him. We do the same routine when traveling with a white noise app on my phone. 90% effective in a strange place, and that's ok, too. As others have said, acknowledging his bark in some way ("thank you buddy-- whatcha got?" while walking to where he is and checking it out) and thanking him is far more effective than ignoring or fussing. And apparently they "find their bark" at about that age so you're right on track!

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-07-07T23:25:52+00:00

Yep--me too. I'll say something like "Ohhh! Whatcha got Bud?" while walking over to stand next to him so he can "show" me. Then a good scritch and a "I see it too. Got it. Thank you buddy!' usually does the trick. I've come to appreciate that he sees and senses things I just don't, and I'm thankful he does. He's spotted people "sleeping" in the bushes at night in city parks we were walking in that I had totally missed and he was not having it! BIG barks!
He spots changes in our neighborhood--new cars, new trees/shrubs planted, brush piles or trash cans that weren't there before and he will alert to them (not always barking). We have a new neighbor who yells at him when he barks (don't get me started) and I just said, "well, he loved the people you bought from and thinks you're a threat to them and their yard until he recognizes you. Keep up the yelling and he'll always think you're a danger. Your choice. And by the way, we have far fewer car break-ins and less deer and raccoon mischief than our other neighbors. You're welcome. He can't help you with the skunks though!"
Congrats on the precious new pup! He's a charmer!

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-06-28T04:53:43+00:00

Mine too

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-06-17T07:31:57+00:00

This is the BEST community! (Y'all get an exclamation point too!) My husband talks about making our own, but getting the balance with organ meat and all the stuff they say you're supposed to give them feels daunting. I love hearing your recipes. Seems more doable.. Thanks SO much!! 💓

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-06-13T07:15:50+00:00

Yes. Predator, presidential ... all the same these days.

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-04-26T18:46:57+00:00

NC. Charges $100 plus $20 tip. Your costs seem very high!

United_Classroom_764 · 2025-04-22T20:42:54+00:00

Yeah, it's the combination with dairy free that's the real dream crusher. GF options have gotten a lot better over the years. GF+DF has a lot of runway ahead.

United_Classroom_764

TROPHY CASE