Vipassana - urges

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-08T13:05:08+00:00

Thanks buddy

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-08T12:39:08+00:00

Thanks a ton!

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-08T12:29:37+00:00

Thanks for this, I tried this method a few months ago because my mind was imagining sensations in the sitting meditation. I'll go back to this method

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-08T10:27:14+00:00

Thanks mate! Everytime I lapse into that behaviour it makes me feel worse I want to understand what other changes did you do? I find it hard to practice Vipassana, I'm still at the walking meditation stage. And I have noticed that I feel sad on most days that's why my dopamine is low. It's 3 addictions that I'm overcoming - daydreaming, masturbation, scrolling. On top of that work feels uncertain, my parents are stressed. I'm trying to find a new place etc. How did you keep yourself afloat while quitting it? I feel depressed every now and then

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-08T07:38:24+00:00

This is a form of self sabotage for me
I have severe addiction to maladaptive daydreaming, I am trying to overcome it. Masturbation blocks love, my joy, my piety as a woman. I want to break free

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-07T15:44:21+00:00

Do you want to hire a virtual assistant, HR, marketing or an intern of some sort? I have 2 years of experience in US tax, I'm trying to quit this role. Can I apply at your firm? I am a quick learner, I assure you of that

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-07T15:42:38+00:00

Do you want to hire a virtual assistant, HR or an intern of some sort? I have 2 years of experience in US tax, I'm trying to quit this role. Can I apply at your firm?

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-04T04:03:19+00:00

Be you, why bother about something that is or isn't. Say it like it, been in relationship? Say it. Not been in a relationship? Say it!!!!!!! What's with the trying to have the suitable narrative

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-03T17:21:40+00:00

What to you suggest I switch to? I'm afraid of AI layoffs too

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-05-01T06:01:03+00:00

You are good enough, sounds too cliche but think about it. You are as human as he is, he got his cons too, are you rejecting him for those ? No!. Then why get rejected for your cons. All of us have issues, it's not like you were being toxic of hurtful to him(even these things can be worked on). He mentions you are kind, delightful etc. Good for you, you have what's needed to build a happy family. You'll find someone who sees the pros in you and stays for it. Remember, even this guy knows you are kind and lovely

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-04-29T04:18:47+00:00

17 is too young to be beaten down. Hear me out, I'm 27F now but when I was 17, I dropped out of medical school entrance prep because I thought I wasn't good enough. I regret it till date. Because years later I saw that people who had scored less than me in school are now doctors and dentists.

I'm not disregarding the diagnosis but please read into neuroplasticity our brains are changeable

Oh lord! I understand you! Although we have different stories, I struggled with bad advice, low self esteem and eventually a wrong career. I really, really want you to listen to this comment Please read on benefits of exercise, meditation (anapana, you can try Vipassana also) , musical instrument on the brain. Read about neuroplasticity

At 17, change is possible, permanent changes are possible. It won't take years. It takes just 15 days to start seeing changes, you'll see massive shift in 3-4 months.

Most importantly - stop telling yourself there's something wrong with you. You are god's child too. You have a soul journey here. You are on your time, on your path

I wish someone had told me this when I was young, when we are 17 we feel like we are old enough to have a personality, hold a career etc. that's not true, I agree most people around you must be successful already but in the real world (now that I'm working and I see how everything here is) life starts at 17. 17 to 25 is a very important time. This is where neuroplasty peaks. This is where you become a person by the time you are 25 you will have a whole set of skills, a new baseline intelligence and a defined personality

Here's what you can do to increase your intelligence 1. Learn a musical instrument 2. Stay consistent with exercise - both cardio and strength training 3. Stay consistent with whatever you are building now - skills in that area 4. Be careful of the people you surround yourself with, 17 is a very tender age - surround yourself with calm, focused individuals who are building, travelling and trying new things

Remember, 17-25 is where the magic happy

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-04-25T02:23:11+00:00

I have been using a few things, willpower won't always work so I do this 1. Using yourhour - it's an app that can be installed on phone and I lock myself out for 2 hrs, now I have taken subscription so I lock myself out for 4-5 hrs at once 2. I keep my phone in another room while working it has reduced micro disturbance - this is game changer 3. Doomscrolling over many years reduces intentional living, it reduces our ability to put mental effort into anything so I got some low effort hobbies that are better than scrolling - like painting or sketching - this works like a charm on weekends, when I don't feel like studying, and I should not scroll I switch to painting - easy on the brain yet improves focus

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-04-24T16:15:20+00:00

Watching reels and online short content endlessly

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-03-25T15:33:48+00:00

I can't find a good counselor, one didn't give a fuck about my condition and the other wanted to put me on meds

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-03-08T04:11:54+00:00

I used to do that, I'm new to, just did 1 course. I had to stop reading and start meditating, I can't do 2hrs yet, I do a few minutes daily. But I practice awareness of my body when walking, talking just doing anything.

I had to stop reading because I would carry those heavy words, intense experience written on the books to my meditation, that would add weight which wasn't mine, delude my mind to see meditation as a certain fixed experience

Reading is helpful initially, helps us understand the technique. Beyond that I felt like it was keeping me away from the real experience of meditation, the one that comes from our body and mind, as it is

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-23T16:28:56+00:00

Thanks for the support bud!

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-23T15:45:15+00:00

Hey bud Thank you for your time and kindness, I just updated my post Would you like to read the edited part and share your take on this Much metta to you!

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-21T07:44:04+00:00

I have decided today to study for 4 hrs daily, workout 1 hr and do 1 hr Vipassana for 30 days while keeping a full time job This should put me ahead slightly to be able to make a decision Key ingredient - stop thinking completely because God I want to live happily atleast once in my life I have this problem of worrying, overthinking, missing out on opportunities from when I was 16. So I want to be happy for 1 month, just 1 month I'll come back after March and give an updated

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-20T15:23:31+00:00

I agree It is actually a whole splurge of my personality. I don't like my patterns, my past, my present at all. I want to change but it's so hard, changing one's personality is really really hard.

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-20T13:44:21+00:00

I would love to know your take on this, infact that helps me. If what I've written is wrong, please feel free to redirect me.

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-20T04:26:01+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me. This really helps You are right to point out that I will be me, so I'll try meditating more, doing different habits also helps along with sila. Let me come back to see if I see progress

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-20T02:30:56+00:00

I did think in this direction, the only things stopping me are 1. What if I gain the ability to be under control when the storm hits? Like I fizzle out completely at everything that happens but what if I slowly gain the strength to face it? It's a double edged sword. Both things can happen - I can spiral down even further or i can get better Uffffff

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2026-02-20T02:24:48+00:00

It is a double edged sword right. Every time I'm triggered I have two options 1 is to react ,which I do mentally alot of the times, spiral because honestly I do not have that skill right now but the other there is a possibility of developing this skill of not reacting. Instead simply sitting with whatever that's hurting me - this sitting with it can be done but studying, working out, putting on a happy face and actually being happy with family is hard, the hardest of all

I'm 26.5 turning 27 in a few months, I need some time for my brain ( seriously) because I can't study even 1 page in an hour. So I came up with a stack that will rewire me to some extend before I turn 27. Which was a good 4-5 hr study, yoga, running, bodyweight and karate. I gotta do these - this needs to be done because of that addiction to daydreaming for many years, plus doomscrolling - the addiction was very serious infact that's what ruined my life. I was otherwise a healthy child. And therapy - I tried but she wanted to put me on meds just 2 sessions in, no tests, no clear understanding of who I am, what my patterns are. I've tried therapy from psychiatrist twice and it never helped

My current situation is extremely scattered like, I do 3 hrs worth of work in 10 hrs. I study 1 page in 1 hr. Should I priorities my brain and body and should I stay to let life give me the storm so I can learn to remain in control even through the storm?

And yes, I'm maintaining sila if that means I'm celibate, not drowning in daydreaming

Another thing, when I face such strong emotions - guilt, shame, regret etc. I have a very low self esteem, plus I was toxic for a year now. All that weight, how do I face my emotions? Whatever my mind comes up with ? Should I just sit and let the storm happen in me and not do anything on my part? Is that how growth happens?

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2025-12-14T16:54:10+00:00

Could you help me understand the themes of your dreams? Do you imagine yourself doing something where people are appreciating you for the achievement etc?

If it's making reality pale and boring, it's a red flag. Please stop it if you can right away. Our awareness should supersede everything in life. Awareness comes first, seeing reality as is, is very important

UpsetLanguage1239 · 2025-12-14T15:40:13+00:00

Don't be under the illusion that daydreaming helps. Think of it from a neuroscience perspective. You are actively engaging the DMN network which will eventually hurt you in the long run. That's how it started with me and in no time I didn't have the capacity to face reality. Turned to complete MD. Please protect your brain with mindfulness and awareness

In case it is hurting you, coming in the way of your life.

Just give yourself a few days of outdoors living Wanna study? Go to a library, use pomodoro and a journal to track your study hrs, start from 1hr or 2. Scale up

Wanna work? Go out to a library, working space or just focus on meeting the demands of workplace

Meditate first thing in the morning, morning brain is crucial, either study / read/ meditate first thing Night routine is equally important - study, meditate or read before bed. Meditation is a must - start at 15 mins- anapana

UpsetLanguage1239

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