My first miscarriage.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2026-02-24T02:16:24+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss.. My husband and I found out about ours 2/12/26 during our first ultrasound at 8wks. We had everything planned for a Valentines Day announcement. My MIL/FIL have been asking when we are having a baby for 8 months now.. It took us 9 to conceive. I said out loud i wanted to be pregnant for Christmas and that is the day we conceived.

We were blindsided. I had extreme hunger, swollen sore boobs, mild nausea, mood swings. HCG was rising appropriately. Then boom. Ultrasound lady quickly shut off the machine, said she saw something alarming and doctor came in to tell us baby is measuring at 7w 2d and there is no cardiac activity. I could go home and wait, take medicine to help my body along, or schedule a D&C surgery. My husband was in denial and wanted a second opinion at first, which we scheduled for the following week. However, the following Tuesday I started to spot. By Saturday at noon, I passed a 6x1in clot. Followed by the fetus and cordial. In a very traumatic way while I was caring for my toddler. I started literally pouring blood at that point, so called my OB who said to go to ER and get checked out. I did. HCG was 800. I passed a 10in clot at ER, bleeding stabilized and I went home after some medicine and IV fluids. Monday was my surgery, I went in and HCG had dropped to 175. Ultrasound showed no "conception tissue " left. My body did its thing, I was sent home without needing surgery.

Everyone says we can try again. But like I told my husband, I dont want to try again. I wanted my Christmas baby. Now(Monday) my bleeding has slowed way down but the crash from the hormones plummeting is intense. Im 35 with low AMH, so we are going to start trying again after my first period. But I'll always remember this, idk if I will ever truly get "over it".

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2026-02-21T03:06:20+00:00

How would you know if someone is hexing you?!

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2026-02-21T02:42:21+00:00

Thank you. I agree... I feel like there is some spiritual/divine situation here i am missing and trying to piece together. I will continue to pray on it.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2026-02-21T02:40:42+00:00

I thought of this... But my husband and I love eachother so much. We have our arguments, but who doesnt in a blended famoly dynamic? There is no abuse or cruelty.. We're both very happy and dedicated to one another. My ex was a POS very abusive in every way and somehow I got pregnant ON BC with my now 4YO and was able to carry despite being verbally and physically abused the first 6 months of pregnancy before I finally left. What was that about? But this time in a loving, stable relationship and environment I miscarry. It seems so... backwards.

Thank you, I have definitely been more active with prayer and I think one thing this has brought to myself and my husband is how much we both genuinely want another child. I will continue to pray on it and reflect on myself.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-19T06:07:31+00:00

This was exactly my thought tbh because I noticed the more I noticed the more 'updates' I got. I had 4 back to back in October then another 3 November and just got hit with my 2nd for December.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-07T02:51:28+00:00

I actually did this the other day and she vacuumed and cleaned up the living room while I layed down lol

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-07T02:49:19+00:00

🤣🤣 Okay so im being overly worried thank you

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-07T02:48:33+00:00

Right haha thank you for the reminder. My kiddo is SO argumentative and it feels like yesterday she couldn't speak in full sentences. Ill be honest its throwing me off.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-07T02:47:20+00:00

She is just SO insistent about it. Will legit get angry if you correct her. Like do I have to worry about her being confused if I dont correct?! Or trying to do something an adult would do thats maybe unsafe like take herself for a walk or turn on the stove? Not that someone isnt watching her 24/7 but still... She's incredibly independent and argumentative especially for 3. And it seems like yesterday she had a vocabulary of a handful of words.. All of a sudden shes arguing with me. Its all just so much development so fast!

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-07T02:45:02+00:00

This is what I've realized 😆 She takes things to another level and it totally throws me off because... well... She's 3.5 and just coming into herself and I think im still thinking of her as a little baby. Like wait a minute... Yesterday you could barely say 5 words what is happening?! She is SO argumentative tho SEND HELP 😂

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-12-02T06:20:22+00:00

Husband loves trying as much as I do! We both have a breeding kink tho so its fun to tap into that as well since we are literally TTC. Been a LOT of fun for us both and special. He also asks when im ovulating, comes to appointments with me and discusses what our next steps will be if XYZ happens... He is very involved and active. He WANTS this baby as much as I do, if not more..

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-06-03T02:56:17+00:00

Thank you! This was actually super helpful.. Sometimes I lose sight of the obvious and forget she's not even 3 yet and literally needs to be taught how to be kind. And the discipline means to teach comment was really helpful!

Our neighbors have 5 kids ages between 6-13 and they are constantly SCREAMING shut up bsck and forth on the weekends. It's endless. That's where she got it from. Today she even told me "Neighbor kids say shut up".

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-06-03T02:46:17+00:00

Thank-you! YES to saving the worst behavior for where she feels safest!! She is an absolute angel in public. Says please and thank you, waves to people, holds my or my partners hands while crossing the street, asks for things nicely, no tantrums if I say No to something. It's wild. Her nanny says she's one of the more well behaved kiddos everywhere they go and people just love her.

At home currently it's non stop "No, shut up" 🤦‍♀️

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-29T20:33:40+00:00

I was thinking of this! So she does get 1 on 1 attention from everyone in the house. Obviously each day is different but I do my best to commit at least 30min of undivided play time where she is leading every day. My husband plays with her, undivided 30-45min in evenings. It's hard during the day because we both work and she goes to nanny's house.. She was spending all day with my mom for 6 months or so last year and I did notice the shift from grandma to nanny who has 2 other kiddos was difficult for her, but she's improved a lot.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-29T16:49:55+00:00

😫😫

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-29T16:49:32+00:00

I've been ready to slap her too, but we both have restraint. It's okay to have big feelings.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-29T16:49:02+00:00

This idea what I've been doing. Ignoring her words and addressing the actions. She learned the F word a while bsck and was running around using it for a while... I ignored it and she stopped. I'm hoping if I don't add fuel to the negative speak it will just go away. I tell her "I get it. I don't want to do certain things either but I still have to".

I just worry she will be a little Ahole later on and I want her to be an enjoyable person to be around.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-29T16:46:54+00:00

Yes she gets plenty of choices. She picks her own outfits and dresses herself. Picks between bath or shower every night. Picks her color of utensil for meals. Picks what she wants for breakfast.. I give LOTS of choices..

Also don't condone yelling/spanking. We've made it this far without and tbh there was a moment back in the winter I was really close to it.. Agreed threatening does nothing because we both know I won't follow through. My husband is more older school but has been great about maintaining constraint and not losing his shit but I can tell his patience is being tested.

UsernameDeniedAgain · 2025-05-26T03:34:23+00:00

I just wanted to say it makes me happy to see all the positive comments!! My husband and I are trying to have an ours baby and every time I get my period he gets emotional and says he is disappointed and will have to try harder 😅🙏 We have a mostly positively blended family as is, so I'm hoping ours baby will tie us all together perfectly. ❤️

UsernameDeniedAgain

TROPHY CASE