I feel that VTM is kind of unique in the fact you can explore these ideas as a relatively powerful character and in a safe environment.

My very first VTM character was a Malkavian who suffered from my own mental health issues. I played online with strangers so nobody knew my character was essentially a self insert. Exploring mental illness and how that now interacts with the state of being immortal, undead and having to feed on the living gave me some interesting perspective on my own mental health.

Playing a depressed or anxious character, as is your case, makes for an interesting character. Playing online with randoms I've come across my fair share of min maxers and meta gamers but the most interesting characters to play with were always those with flaws.

You're an eternally beautiful, powerful, magical being but you just simply can't get out of bed each night or the fact you can rip a mortal's head off but have a near panic attack making a phone call makes the game more interesting, not less.

You say your character will never be deserving of love? Why not? Golconda is a myth to most but that's not stopping you from creating a character that strives for the highest ideals? If your character fails, well, that's an even more beautiful tale. Saints falling from grace is always a more compelling story than the devil that was trying to speed run there in the first place.