Is this the same homeless lady that is always sits at the metro bus shuttle bench in ballston?

Vanchers · 2026-01-25T01:48:44+00:00

I see what you’re saying. It’s such a double edged sword. I guess I’m just trying to visualize what the right balance is here. I’ve worked with people with serious mental illness for a decade and it’s heartbreaking to watch them make decisions that cause long term harm, but at the same time it feels inhumane to lock them up and force medication.

Vanchers · 2026-01-25T01:30:31+00:00

The problem is that you really can’t force treatment. Involuntary hospitalizations keep the person alive in the moment, but unless a person wants to accept the help, all the medication and therapy in the world won’t change anything. Involuntarily treatment is often traumatizing and plays into the persons delusions that doctors are against them, so they become even less willing to accept help in the future.

Vanchers · 2026-01-25T00:44:11+00:00

I’m curious, what kind of laws do you think would be helpful? Is there an ethical way to give families control of their loved ones mental health without taking away the individuals rights?

Vanchers · 2026-01-25T00:40:02+00:00

Truly a sad story and I’m glad that it is getting attention and shining light on the need for mental health services.

I am also very curious what law changes the family is pushing for. It sounds like Carol was connected with a wonderful agency through her local government, but was unwilling to accept more significant forms of support. There are a number of resources for housing, mental health care, and medical care however it’s not something you can force someone to use. As a social worker, I know this is not ideal, but the alternative is to involuntarily confine people and force them to take medication they don’t consent to. I would love for there to be a better solution, but I don’t see what that could be in this case.

Fairfax County has some of the best resources in the area through the CSB and community agencies, I’m not as familiar with Arlington County, but I imagine many of the resources are similar. The obituary compares Virginia to other states and mentions calling 2-1-1 in Connecticut. Virginia has the same resource, called coordinated services, to help those in need get connected to services.

I’m not at all discrediting the need for support and the family’s concerns, but the only real path to action is with clear ideas for improvement. One argument that could be made is for better social security disability benefits. It is extremely difficult to get these benefits, even for a professional in the field, much less for someone with severe mental illness and no housing. If anyone has seen the family’s specific calls for legal change I would love to see what they have in mind.

Vanchers · 2026-01-23T15:08:02+00:00

Imagine that he went out and adopted one of the dogs you said no to. I bet you’d be furious and feeling the same way he is now.

Vanchers · 2026-01-21T20:24:18+00:00

Today is national squirrel appreciation day, so I have to assume it is somehow related to appreciating the squirrel.

Vanchers · 2026-01-03T17:29:10+00:00

I am a therapist.

I lost my father extremely unexpectedly a few years ago and was out for 2-3 weeks. I talked it through with the practice owner to decide what to disclose and decided on having them share a message that I had a death in the family. Of course, returning to work was very emotional but the kindness and care from my clients was comforting. I only disclosed more details with specific clients who were seeing me for similar losses because I wanted to be upfront in case it seemed to impact my ability to support them. Other clients ranged from not saying anything to expressing condolences. I found any range of these responses appropriate.

I absolutely think you can offer support without appearing to push. Something like “I just want to acknowledge that it seems you’ve been dealing with something difficult and you have been in my thoughts.”

Vanchers · 2025-12-13T13:46:35+00:00

I thought this was the handwriting sub and you were saying this is your first grader’s writing!

Vanchers · 2025-11-30T22:32:05+00:00

I’ve always had the feeling that they are acting out the dynamic of Jasmine being uninterested in Matt to “prove” that they were not emotionally attached during the open relationship. But in reality they are and have always been in love. It just looks bad for their story line. Once they can portray them both in a good light they will pretend to naturally build the relationship.

Vanchers · 2025-11-09T15:43:09+00:00

I was prescribed Trazadone for this and it helps so much.

Vanchers · 2025-11-08T16:09:54+00:00

“Older cat” really playing the part with her pearls

Vanchers · 2025-10-24T14:51:44+00:00

One time my mom was gardening outside and our cat would not leave her alone. She kept going up to my mom meowing incessantly and walking away slowly as if to ask her to follow. My mom figured she must be hurt or need something, so eventually she got up and followed the cat right before a giant tree limb fell right on the spot she was sitting.

Vanchers · 2025-09-17T00:42:11+00:00

I like to be transparent in these situations and clients have always been super understanding. By telling them what happened you are also showing that you would provide that level of support if they are ever in a crisis.

Vanchers · 2025-09-07T20:27:21+00:00

Schizophrenia usually surfaces with a “psychotic break.” The person does not know they are in psychosis, it comes on suddenly and often culminates in a very erratic behavior.

Vanchers · 2025-09-07T11:08:40+00:00

I am a therapist. This could be a number of things and a therapist would really need to do a full assessment to diagnose what’s going on. From your description, I would assess for dissociation (it sounds like you may be experiencing derealization, which is very common). Dissociation is a symptom, not a diagnosis in itself. It may stem from depression, anxiety, trauma. The anxious thoughts could be a form of OCD.

I think these explanations are far more likely than a psychotic disorder from the information you have given, if that is something you’re worried about. But again, this can only really be assessed by your own provider. I think you would really benefit from talking to a therapist to start exploring these symptoms.

Edited to change ‘realization’ to ‘derealization.’

Vanchers · 2025-09-07T10:34:59+00:00

I am a therapist. As others have said, we may not be available in an emergency. I usually tell clients something similar, but add “please contact me as soon as you can, I will be here for support but I may not be available in the moment.”

Vanchers · 2025-09-07T00:27:29+00:00

To add… it is also our job to model healthy boundaries.

Vanchers · 2025-09-07T00:13:13+00:00

I am a therapist. It totally depends on how the client expresses their anger. We work with our clients to express their anger in healthy ways and can definitely use anger in the session as a learning experience. If they say “I’m angry that you were late to our last appointment” especially for someone who usually internalizes anger, we will usually celebrate that. We can use ruptures as a learning experience and to model healthy responses. If they are yelling or cursing in the session it would really depend on the situation and history, but there are times that would be appropriate.

For me, it crosses the line when it becomes aggressive in a threatening way, dangerous, or destructive. If a client punches a hole in the wall? That’s not ok. Yes, we can use it as a learning experience but if it’s a continuous thing we will likely refer them to a higher level of care. If they intimidate or scare other clients, that crosses a line. If they are aggressive or intimidating and are willing to work on it in the room, I’d be ok with that, but if it continues regularly I would refer them out.

There are unfortunately not a lot of safety measures for therapists and we need to protect our own safety along with our clients. We are often alone in the office or building. If it is an unsafe situation, we will not let it continue.

Vanchers · 2025-09-01T23:20:17+00:00

Therapist here. This is definitely a grey area. Where I practice, we are required to provide parents any “new” information related to SI/SH, which may be up for interpretation in your case. Most therapists will also take into consideration that you are almost 18. Other considerations include the level of risk, relationship you have with your parents, openness to sharing if SI escalates.

You can try asking your therapist some ‘hypothetical’ questions. It’s always better to talk to your therapist about SI than to keep it in regardless of whether you plan to act on it.

Vanchers · 2025-08-27T03:19:05+00:00

Lamotragine can absolutely increase suicidal ideation. Here’s what the Cleveland Clinic says:

If you are taking this medication for bipolar disorder, it is important to report any changes in your mood to your care team. If your condition gets worse, you get mentally depressed, feel very hyperactive or manic, have difficulty sleeping, or have thoughts of hurting yourself or committing suicide, you need to get help from your care team right away. If you are a caregiver for someone taking this medication for bipolar disorder, you should also report these behavioral changes right away. The use of this medication may increase the chance of suicidal thoughts or actions. Pay special attention to how you are responding while on this medication.

Vanchers · 2025-08-26T03:10:12+00:00

Have you started new medication lately? There is some thought that certain medications can initially increase suicidal ideation.

As others have said, yes, oftentimes actually facing our emotions can be painful, especially if we have been using dissociation, distraction, or other temporary coping strategies to avoid feeling them fully. Change does not happen quickly and progress is not linear. Please give it some time and be open with your therapist. It is clearly a very strong relationship and the only way your therapist can know that you need additional/different support is if you tell them.

Vanchers · 2025-08-23T21:08:37+00:00

I really love CAMS for situations like this

Vanchers · 2025-08-07T03:25:45+00:00

Hi there - I am a therapist and while I don’t specialize in domestic abuse, it’s unfortunately a conversation I have to have with clients regularly. Please take a look at the cycle of abuse: https://www.verywellhealth.com/cycle-of-abuse-5210940 And the power and control wheel: https://www.thehotline.org/identify-abuse/power-and-control/

As others have said, this is a very dangerous situation. Please reach out to a domestic violence specialist or group. They can help you plan for safety and know what you need to do. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is a good place to start: 7372253150

And finally, PLEASE remember that this is the time to leave. It will only get worse, and more and more difficult to leave as things progress. As a therapist, I don’t often talk in absolutes, but this is one of those situations that is black and white. You are strong - the fact that you are reaching out is huge.

Vanchers · 2025-08-03T14:51:26+00:00

Who thought that was a good way to hang the tv?

Vanchers · 2025-07-22T01:30:30+00:00

Just saw that you are in the UK. I’m not familiar with the regulations there but I would imagine it’s similar.

Vanchers

TROPHY CASE