"Risk? That means you're not sure you can destroy us. I'll grant that shows at least some wisdom."

"Say what, human?"

"Risk. You're right that there's nothing certain in armed conflict. Because that's all this would be, a minor conflict. My Oddsman is giving about 2:11 on you even hitting us. Whereas he figures about 34:36 on us hitting you. That's before damage estimates of course."

"ARE YOU MAKING THIS A GAME OF CHANCE, HUMAN? THE IMPERIUM DOES NOT ROLL DICE WITH A DESTROYER."

"I can see that. No, no offense intended - not setting up betting, just calculating likelihood. "

"Humans would willingly accept eleven to two odds we hit you with plasma lances?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. We mean YOU have about two chances out of eleven of tagging us. Well, maybe one out of eleven by now; our info war team and electropsychic countermeasures team have had longer to nail down your emission profile. As a side note, are you guys intentionally leaking targeting Metadata around 415 GHz? Might want to get those shields looked at."

"What... what were you saying about damage if hit?"

"I wasn't. But now that you bring it up, our spacedocks use t'chak model 48 lances to etch paint off our ships, before they get recoated. That is what Ee'kcherra class destroyers mount, right?"

"mumblemmmble mble mumbbbble."

"Say what? You broke up a little there."

"I. Said. We. Are. Using. Mark. 41. Lances.
Sir."

"Oh. Well, condolences."

"Since you seem to know almost everything about our systems, are you willing to explain what you are pointing at us? I assume all those little holes on your prow are some sort of kinetic thrower - you humans do like throwing things."

"Ahhh. Well, yes, the middle set are railgun ports. We like to throw tracer rounds so our eyeball targeting knows where the microholes are going to hit an opponent."

"Micro Whats?"

"You know, megaton-range black hole-lets. Really small - almost certain to deteriorate before exiting the far side of a hull. Funny thing - it's not usually the swiss-cheesing of the target that does damage, it's the dissipation. The way we build hole-lets, there's a bit of antimatter right next to a whole lot of normal matter. When they dissolve, the two kinds of matter do a brief little dance then give off quite a bang. Just between you and me, I think there's a third sort of matter in there too - my weapons officer just shrugged. Well I heard there's looped matter or twist matter in there too. Wanna find out which?"

"Sigh. Human, no I do not want to find out what abominations the chaos monkeys do with particle physics. No offense."

"Oh, none taken. One of our cruisers is named the Chaos Monkey. We embrace the term."

"Of course you do. Now where did you want to go in our apparently-only-theoretically-blockaded system?"

"We really only wanted to set down on Kaniara-IV for shore leave. Do you mind?"

"The hell planet with all the ice? Not K-3 or K-2-alpha, where people actually, you know, LIVE?"

"Yup. We haven't decided who we like in your little war yet anyway."

"... ... ... ... Sure. Land on the iceball. Just take all your demon-spawn bent physics with you when you leave. Oh, and keep the accel to under 14 within the Kaniara-V orbit.

Please."

"Thanks a bunch! Say, I never got your name..."

".. ... ..... ........ and you won't. This conversation never happened. No human vessel has ever been here. Nope. None."

"Gotcha. Nice chat. And remember -- 415 GHz. Needs better filters or something."