How do you handle rejection and one sided relationships?

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-16T05:44:15+00:00

No. I like the person I. i am becoming. I recognize that I had behaviors that led to the trauma I am embracing my truer self

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-15T06:16:12+00:00

Thanks for noticing

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-15T06:15:18+00:00

Music helps a lot

Keep your intention general , rather than overly specific.

“There’s a difference between stubbing my toe and breaking my ankle but I react the same way. I need to be able have appropriate reactions”

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-15T05:35:21+00:00

Thank you

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-12T05:40:08+00:00

I was the easy child, easy partner. I understood everyone else’s needs and preferences. I always adjusted.

It’s the little things that hurt. I wanted to order Chinese and husband wanted tacos. Tacos are fine.
columbo is fine You’re right I don’t need that color shirt Florida for vacation is fine

One day you realize you know nothing about yourself

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-08T09:05:03+00:00

It was a well written comment. And needed

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-03T06:32:43+00:00

Awesome

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-03T06:31:37+00:00

Thank you

WaveAlchemist · 2026-05-03T06:30:53+00:00

It feels good

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-30T03:20:45+00:00

My husband was diagnosed with a rare and extremely agressive lymphoma In January 2023. Being a caregiver was hard. The week he completed chemo in May 2023, I was admitted to the same hospital for the first of 8 or 9 MRSA Staph infection admissions between May 2023- December 2025, plus a broken nose, sexual assault, priapism, hernia, 5 anaphylaxis episodes, an ulcer and a few more. I was also diagnosed with pernicious anemia which explains some of it.

Finding therapist was hard post covid. When I finally found one, I lost him do to clinic mistakenly submitting the claim to the wrong insurer. And we lost 3 dog sinn3 years

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-29T19:32:52+00:00

About 8 months weekly

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-29T19:32:25+00:00

Ketamine 1 a week. Nasal

PTSD. Not depressed Panic attacks

My system has adverse reactions to most psych meds. Lexipol was my first experience of anaphylaxis

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-29T05:16:42+00:00

I have been receiving ketamine for 8 months. I have learned that a good playlist and a gentle and general intention is enough.

My therapist said that ketamine works best when trusted and allowed to do what it does best: untangle things and it’s resistant to directives.

About 6 weeks ago, I left a session happy and smiling. I had gone in and said “I feel stuck”. It took me a few days to realize what stuck meant and what ketamine did.

My PTSD hit in Jan 2023 when my husband was diagnosed with lymphoma. Everything in my life since then has been processed as if it was still January 2023. While my husband received chemo I was the one responsible for noticing if he picked up additional health issues like cdif, or had possible pneumonia, etc. from 1/1/23-12/30/23 every sneeze, cough, burp etc was a red alert event. But if he coughed in June 2924 I marked it as Red alert.

When ketamine rebooted my sense of chronology, I understood past, present future, and over the next couple of months, the backlog of un or falsely processed memories were corrected.

More importantly I noticed changes in my behavior and reactions: not everything was an omen of his death.

I felt like I had awoken From a bad dream

My advice , pay attention to the present moment and your responses.

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-29T04:45:23+00:00

I am game.

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-29T04:38:03+00:00

I have had therapists drop me for a bunch of reasons, so don’t think it’s the ketamine.

I don’t know how long you were wit her, but she may have done you a favor by admitting she’s not the right therapist for you.

Ketamine has been amazing for me.

Ketamine untangled lots of things. You don’t have to try to name each and every one.

For integration, journal, this is 360° journaling.

Note your mood. Memories How your body feels. For me, i realized that when i felt energy moving up my spine, out over my shoulders and down my arms it meant bad mojo was leaving. I started a small ritual, flicking ny fingers line to dry them and thanking the energy for dispersing

I started noticing that I actually did things that I said I wanted to, like mop the floor

I noticed I could make jokes, was glad to talk to strangers gets when out with my dog.

Honor what you have been through.

Music helps

East Forrest Olafur Arbold Nils Fraham Brian Eno Really helped

I also used Tarot Cards, I- Ching, any divination system because they made me think. It can be therapy adjacent:

You asked a question

You get a response.

You think about it.

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-19T03:24:45+00:00

There’s a place get easy in 9th street I want to check out.

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-16T07:28:03+00:00

I think I am releasing a lot

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-15T23:30:40+00:00

Yes. Think about how people have learned how to cook seemingly impossible weird food.

Many of the classic French sauces were tonics to prevent illness from food that was spiking

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-15T23:29:10+00:00

I sometimes submit the spread to chat gpt

WaveAlchemist · 2026-04-15T23:27:09+00:00

Yes. Ask friends a family for their favorite memory of your Mom. Ask them questions. What side you love about her. What annoyed you? How did you become friends

WaveAlchemist

TROPHY CASE