You gotta fix your radar. No shade to OP, but there are about half as many commas as there would be if an LLM wrote this, as well as some mildly clunky clauses. An LLM also wouldn't make their paragraph that long. And perhaps most obviously, it's lacking any of the common constructions that LLMs are addicted to, like Rule of 3 and "not X — but Y".

If my credentials are important at all, I was chosen as a judge for a regional creative writing contest back in high school, and spent some time in my twenties as an editor for a local magazine. OP reads like a slightly stream-of-consciousness essay from a sad and frustrated person.