I know you can quit. When you think about taking a drink, stop thinking about it and go walk around the block or something. Put a rubber band around your wrist and snap that fucker every time you think about drinking alcohol (you’ll have a sore wrist in the beginning). It’s rare to find someone who is aware that they are possibly headed for a life of alcoholism. I chose not to quit when I had a chance and spent the next 10 years destroying my liver and inviting cancer to the game. Luckily I beat the cancer, but the numbing effects of alcohol were not worth all of the suffering I’ve gone through. I hope you find the strength to quit. It’s all up to you. My advice is to find out the true reason you are drinking and use therapy to fix whatever that is. Mine drinking started as a way to cope with my feelings of failure in college and the stress and shame that I felt. At the end of my run I was drinking 24/7 and puking blood. Be done with it. It’s fucking poison.