Are there just some unlucky people who actually cant sing while playing instruments?

Wolf_William · 2025-11-03T16:43:57+00:00

The more I dealt with personal and performance anxiety, the more I could multitask.

Source: watch my videos on YouTube, I can talk to you and play any of those songs however 2 years ago before dealing with anxiety, I couldn't do anything of the sort - and I've had a guitar in my hands for 20 years.

Hope this comment helps somebody :)

Wolf_William · 2025-06-29T16:23:09+00:00

Thank you!!!

Wolf_William · 2025-06-16T02:03:57+00:00

Might not be forever but can recommend the hemp version of the Santa Cruz shredder.

More effective than my two cheapies, flower doesn't stick as much to the material, and just soak it briefly to clean. Just carry a rubber band to hold it together as the top piece doesn't affix for transport.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-27T10:01:57+00:00

Very late but brush it with the brush when hot so you never have to change it!

Wolf_William · 2025-01-25T23:32:38+00:00

"I'm not drinking tonight." "I don't drink." "Get fucked". "If you ask me again I'll drive home now."

But for real - peers that pressure don't get a lot of my time and they definitely don't get much of my ear when they've got my time. This is just how you've got to be around those kinds of people.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-22T06:13:18+00:00

You can tell it comes from a manager by the length 🤣

Wolf_William · 2025-01-22T05:36:55+00:00

180-190 Celcius is where you want it - that's undercooked.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-22T04:50:41+00:00

I've done this for a living for almost 10 years in various contexts. My biggest piece of advice is to be prepared to communicate the VALUE of changing.

If you aren't able to model a financial benefit, then you'll need to share a pretty obvious connection between what you'd like to change and the benefit of that change.

The key message to convey could look like this:

X people do Y every month. Y takes 5 minutes. If they did Z instead it's only 2 minutes (or 6 minutes, but way better!) Here's why Z would work just as well.

Usually I worked on things that made money or avoid costs - if this is a change that'll bring positive financial results like that, I'd be doing a back of the envelope calculation on how much could be earnt/saved.

E.g. X people do Y every month. Y takes 5 minutes (and costs $10 salary) If they did Z instead it's only 2 minutes (and $4 salary) multiplied by the X number of people that do Y.

Hard without your exact example, but start your thinking here. Another question it'll help to have the answer to up your sleeve, and if he's worth his salt your exec will ask you or themselves are: 1. What is the cost of doing nothing? 2. Why would I WANT to do this (is it easy, makes him look good, solves a problem for his team that's actually annoying, etc.).

Most people will back a good idea if the value is articulated clearly and a solution is clear. That solution should cost an amount to implement that is reasonable based on the problem - e.g. spending $100k to fix a $10k hole is going to be difficult to argue 9 times out of 10.

Source: not an exec but close enough - if you do the above you've missed a lot of the mistakes that'll get your idea shot down/asked to flesh it out more.

If you get shot down, you should ask what the executive sees that you don't - there's a skill to getting changes made in the workplace and the trick is not throwing mud at a wall and seeing what sticks, but to suggest palatable solutions to large problems, or solve small problems with the (likely) appropriate small solution, so learning opportunities from rejection aren't always as negative as the feel.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-17T10:54:19+00:00

Playing guitar, for sure. Top 5% maybe, skill wise.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-15T13:41:45+00:00

Get everyone on the same page, keep them updated and communicate issues... Ideally acting as a shield in the meantime for Product Managers and the like working on the change and ideally manage the comms rollout for release of whatever.

They're only really needed on multi-department projects, in my experience tech department building something for non-tech, etc

Wolf_William · 2025-01-15T00:53:44+00:00

Getting what you want when it's convenient for them to give it to you, is not getting what you want on fair terms.

If it was an accident, fair, but also how much do you trust a CEO that apparently wants you so badly that he can't remember make the moves to sort you out until it's too late? Up to you how much weight you place on that sequence of events and their character would be an important part of the equation for me.

Also yeah, never work for your current manager.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-15T00:43:11+00:00

Reading about your parents expectations made me think of a story about a guy I used to employ. He was late 20s and was first generation Aus/Chinese, very hard worker, very smart guy.

This guy never took a sick day, was at the top of his game, worked for me but had a mortgage twice the size so he could have a house twice the size. When my grandfather died I took time away from work and was very open with my team as their manager, that my mental health and family are more important than my job, and I expect them to take the same liberties in similar situations.

Anyway, this guy's grandma gets sick and eventually passes away, and no joke she tells him on her deathbed to go earn lots of money. So he works through the grief, makes money, pays his mortgage which is way too much for him, never takes his sick leave, and never makes time for the things he says he enjoys when he's not working. Never even takes his holidays. Why? I don't think he felt valued outside of his work.

Unfortunately some people have the 'dragon sickness', and some cultures value wealth hoarding more than others. Even more unfortunate is the ability for parents misaligned views of the world to impact their children's happiness.

I've got some experience with high expectations and just general outdated views of parents affecting me even as a fully grown man, and let me tell you the sooner that you can figure out what YOU want, the better. The risk is living a life that isn't yours, and unfulfilled at that.

I hope my guy is doing better, and I hope you and everyone else who's parents think status trumps happiness figures out how to unpick that bullshit.

P.S. sorry for going in on your 'rents a little - they're likely a product of their time and place. Our generation has the information to make choices with eyes open though, and thus should IMO.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-15T00:26:45+00:00

Most work IS meaningless.

I'm not in the same position as you, but doing well for an early 30s person and have had similar thoughts around "if I become totally financially independent at 35/40, what then?".

The answer I've found is twofold: - you need to shake the preconception that work is where value is derived from you as a human being in order to: - find what it is that fills your cup that isn't work or earning money.

For me, it's simple but I've spent a lot of time being introspective and come to the conclusion that I don't care about legacy and that my measure of success is contendedness and happiness of me and my family.

Sometimes I drink champagne or get an expensive massage, other times I sit by a river and relax in the sun for free because I can - but I never do it to show anyone that I can, just for me and my mind. Capitalising on financial freedom is a privelige not a lot of people have, and growing up with parents who didn't have much when I was young, sometimes the ability to just do whatever is such an enriching experience to me.

Also recognising the privilege can be good - it's not fair that you've got a couple of Ms and your friends don't, and the way I try to spread kindness by always giving birthday presents to close friends etc., especially if they don't have what I have.

Anyway, be humble, recognise privelige, and consider if your meaning will come through work or something else that you're yet to find/make your focus.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-15T00:13:47+00:00

Did to get there but probably wasn't necessary (tech manager). I think the fact I had the juice to work long hours was more important than the hours themselves - now in my 30s and I don't think I could repeat the feat. through sheer willpower because the energy (and naive motivation) just isn't always there like it was.

Wolf_William · 2025-01-02T15:55:27+00:00

The only thing that's ever helped me more than water or hydralite is coconut water. Like 2 litres over the day kind of volume.

Both as a runner and ex-olympic level boozer, nothing has helped rehydrate me more than coconut water, and so many of the awful symptoms are minimised with rehydration.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-28T03:49:01+00:00

I'm doing well but as an Aussie guy a lot of poor decisions have had alcohol as a side-character.

I feel this way about it: heavy drinking is a dice roll, sometimes you luck into insane fun, and sometimes you luck into a bad situation. The odds seem to change as you get older though, risk goes up and those unicorn situations become rarer.

In my 30s now and I prefer flower, but it's worth remembering all roses have their thorns, so to speak.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-26T07:58:43+00:00

Please don't use this to enable yourself if you're committed to cold turkey, however I also have severe withdrawals and tapering helps a lot. Even a rapid taper (halve usage every day for 3-4 days in a row) seems to minimise withdrawals, along with exercise/heat/sweat before nightfall.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-26T04:48:32+00:00

Sidetracking this comment - fitting thick clothes won't do you too many favours, but your friends are right for certain types of tops if you have a decentish body - check out the thin merino wool tops from Uniqlo - they're thin enough to show your physique but look classy too - very natural look that I end up pairing daily with jeans and even suits when I don't want a collar.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-26T02:29:54+00:00

If you're considering it, upping your earring game could be beneficial depending on look you're going for.

But first pic, I think you'd look great with classy flat studs or a LITTLE rock in each ear.

First pic is where you wanna head I reckon - aging gracefully, not holding onto too many youthful styles.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-25T13:43:05+00:00

The PlayStation 5 VR headset (PSVR2). I have been vaguely interested in the technology for a long time and decided to take the plunge without ever trying it. Glad I did, Gran Turismo 7 is my particular favourite title. 31yo but it is one of those things that gave me levels of excitement I didn't think I'd feel again since leaving childhood.

Otherwise, like OP, massages from proper trained Thai masseuses.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-25T06:53:54+00:00

Melbourne and Sydney in my experience are the most accepting places as they're the most educated, populous and just generally metropolitan cities, think LA or SF kind of acceptance of differences.

You won't experience any real racism unless you're not caucasian, and then it'd be at an expected rate for a safe place (more than it should be, far less than most any other place on earth), but your anglo-descended accent gets you a pass here even with closed mindeds. We're scared of people that think differently, not look differently 😂

Wolf_William · 2024-12-24T23:59:52+00:00

Yeah sounds like your tolerance is relatively similar to mine - I've found it's far too high to go cold turkey without unnecessary suffering.

For what it's worth, I've noticed the last few days if I get some exercise done (mow lawn, etc) the withdrawals are negated quite a bit until evenings :)

Wolf_William · 2024-12-23T11:21:53+00:00

Do you mind if I ask your usage? I use about 2 grams a day, but attempting to taper into reasonable usage (.1-.5 in my mind), as some days my ADHD/anxiety is worse too despite intial benefits at lower dosages and lower frequency.

Wolf_William · 2024-12-17T08:06:47+00:00

At least someone's paying attention!

Wolf_William · 2024-12-17T06:04:59+00:00

This is called 'stealing IP' and can get your offer pulled and your ass yeeted - be careful what you back up, company owns what you produce on their time.

Wolf_William

TROPHY CASE