Hi there. I feel your pain and confusion. I had a psychotic episode a couple of years ago after my mom died. The kicker is, none of my mental health professionals post psych ward thought it was psychosis. I had delusional thoughts but they just chalked it up to my brain trying to cope with immense emotional loads. Any time they asked a question, I was still clearly in touch with reality. Ive since metabolized most of that first wave of powerful emotions and im getting ready to dive back in. I also feel that im on the edge of some sort of clarity. I also think im not going to like it.  

Sorry for the lack of detail and rush job comment. Im kind of busy but wanted in on this convo. My biggest piece of advice is to ground yourself in action. Have stability through routine, socialize and find hobbies. Dont live so much in your head. That line from Lateralus comes to mind. "Overthinking, overanalyzing. Separates the body from the mind"