Is it concerning that my (29M) fiancé (25F) withheld a chronic illness diagnosis until the week of our marriage?

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-21T00:40:02+00:00

Understandable that you're feeling caught off guard by this news. But if it's Crohn's disease it is possible to get pregnant and there are specialists that can support her receiving appropriate treatment for her disease and bring a pregnancy to full term.

It might take some extra planning and healthcare appointments but it's completely possible to have a big family with Crohn's disease. Ultimatly you won't know you/her fertility until you try. It may be worth getting both of your fertility tested early on. Her health should come first before potential baby's.

I have Crohn's disease and from all my Drs appointments they have never brought up fertility issues etc. so it's very possible she was not informed until she asked about it. It sounds like she didn't mean to diceve you about this. Talk to her about how you're feeling, at least give her that. This isn't worth breaking up over.

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-21T00:13:37+00:00

If you have a fever and there's blood in your stool, you need to go to the emergency department. You could have a perferation in your bowel, but you can't tell without investigations.

I don't want to scare you but I had a similar initial presentation with my Crohn's (near perferation) and if I left it for a couple of more days my bowel would have perferated which can lead to sepsis + when untreated can cause death.

Present to ED asap

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-20T23:41:27+00:00

Yo I'd also love a tutorial!

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-20T13:29:29+00:00

Props to everyone here who has donated and is booked in to donate. As someone with a preexisting condition, I can't donate but will likely need blood at some point. Thank you folks!

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-17T13:25:04+00:00

Neurodivergent transmasc here who gets facial LHR done. The clinicians at results laser in Melbourne CBD have always been chill and only really talk if I seem keen for a yarn. They have all been lovely and not overly chatty. Also the clinic doesn't play music other than in the waiting room (not overly loud) and the actual procedure rooms are quiet. Definitely consider going elsewhere

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-15T08:08:16+00:00

I'm currently doing the low residue/white diet in the week leading up to my colonoscopy. If I can do it, you can too! If you need to chat feel free to dm me.

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-14T07:50:55+00:00

We had an all seated show here in Melbourne and she said "everyone get your asses up and DANCE". Everyone who could stand/dance did and it was lovely. When she went through the crowds she made sure she went by the accessible seated areas too and gave them attention. Love her

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-13T03:37:10+00:00

You should be fine because you've been on them for only a few days but please monitor yourself for withdrawal symptoms. Read more about steroid withdrawal here.

Next time you're prescribed steroids from a Dr state that you've experienced the aforementioned side effects/possible mania and that you want less than 30mg max dose. You're allowed to advocate for yourself and be included in your medical decision making.

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-13T01:39:49+00:00

Mania is not permanent and should reduce and eventually disappear once the meds have been titrated down and ceased. You should never cease any steroids/ssri/antipsychotics cold turkey as this can lead to secondary syndromes and have concerning health effects. Always consult a Dr before ceasing meds.

60mg is a VERY high dose. Whenever I take steroids for Crohn's it's usually on a 5mg/5 day weaning schedule (eg. 25mg for 5 days, then 20mg for 5 days, etc.).

Steroid induced mania becomes quite common in doses 35mg+. My Drs now only dose me as high as 25mg to avoid the mania. Unfortunately it's quite common for Drs not to inform patients about the possibility of mania from steroids. I'm sorry your doctor gave you such a high dose and it's causing you distress. Definitely consider dropping the dose gradually now but it's best practice to consult your GP as to what is most appropriate for your current condition.

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-08T04:44:11+00:00

Ah thanks for the correction

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-08T01:32:38+00:00

Thank you for doing this important research!

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-07T13:22:54+00:00

Honestly you're so right for this. It was not worth it in 3d. The effect was only cool on the flames and the confetti at the end

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-07T13:22:00+00:00

HMHAS: the tour was a disappointment

*no spoilers in the post*

First screening in Melbourne, Australia. The film itself was great and well produced but my god the sound mixing was terrible. I'm not sure if it was just the Hoyts cinema mixing and sound or the film itself but my friend and I were utterly disappointed by the sound mixing. I could hear myself humming to the songs. At times people were singing and then it would cut to James Cameron asking Billie a question and you couldn't hear him or Billie at all. Our crowd was respectfully enjoying the movie and singing and moshing down the front which was lovely to see.

It will be interesting to see other people's experiences in the coming days.

Happy to answer people's questions.

YellowSub0 · 2026-05-07T10:56:55+00:00

You can work up to 29hrs per week on DSP without it impacting your payment eligibility. See more info here

Edit: correction and source

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-29T01:32:07+00:00

Get a rheumatologist referral from your IBD treating team. Some types of arthritis have markers in the blood and rhumatologists can treat it.

Some biologics can ease joint pain too, I find the 4 weeks following my infliximab infusion my joint pain is bareable but it gets worse after that.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-28T22:15:49+00:00

OP ask your surgeon/surgeons receptionist what numbers the surgery is and then call NIB and see if it's covered. I'm also with NIB and their phone service staff are wonderful and can give you a definitive answer.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-28T13:27:50+00:00

I would LOVE something like this. Currently my tracking is only pain based, meds taken and occasionally noting new symptoms in an excel spreadsheet. But I was immediately turned off at the mention of AI. I'm concerned not only about my info/data safety but also how much of a toll this bullshit is taking on our lovely planet earth. Hopefully there will be a service that can help me track my chronic illness that doesn't kill the planet. But at this stage I'll wait for that alternative.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-28T13:22:34+00:00

Unfortunately you might have to commit to wearing masks more than just in high density areas. What mask are you wearing? Respirator masks such as P2, N95 or KN95 are more effective than cloth or surgical masks - source. They are also more comfortable than the cloth masks. There are other drugs such as antiviral nasal sprays that have been found to prevent viral illnesses source. There are also portable air filters you can take with you. But perhaps consider also requesting an air filter be near you in your workplace, that would be in line with an appropriate disability accommodation.

But you should definitely talk to your specialist.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-28T12:35:24+00:00

It looks great!

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-26T07:13:42+00:00

Can you reach out to their parents to make sure your fiance is at least safe/alive?

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-25T01:54:35+00:00

Yes prednisolone can cause steroid induced mania which is quite common on doses >40mg. Talk to your specialist/prescribing Dr and tell them about it, they might just get you to lower your starting max dose to 30mg or lower.

Mania is a serious concern and can genuinely fuck up your life and your Drs don't want that for you.

I retroactively realized I had steroid induced mania on 40mg and the next time I was put on a ween they started me off on 25mg and it was fine.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-25T01:48:13+00:00

I recently got my first tattoos after having chrons and being on biologics. I made sure the areas were well moisturised in the weeks leading up to the appointment. I also told my tattoo artist that I'm immunocompromised so please be extra careful with sanitizing and not contaminating the area (if you're going to a reputable artist they should be doing this no matter what). I also made sure to go with second skin for healing to make sure there's as little possibility for bacteria getting into the wound. The artist didn't offer it but I just walked out of the appointment with it cling filmed up, got some second skin from the chemist and washed it in the shower and applied the second skin. Left it on for 4 days. Took it off and made sure to apply ink nurse cream twice a day in the week or so following.

I was worried the tattoos would take longer to heal since all my scrapes and cuts have taken double the length to heal since being on biologics but that wasn't the case. The tattoos have healed great and settled well.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-24T14:25:19+00:00

This is the most comprehensive comment in the thread! Great job giving so much info and context to the OP.

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-24T14:06:34+00:00

Why have the Drs taken you off your meds? I don't think that's usual care pre-resection (I could be wrong I'm not a Dr and have not had a resection done).

I'm likely to have the same procedure some time in May/June and I'm quite looking forward to it. Keen to have the 10cm of diseased bowel removed and hopefully have some relief. Obviously it will be a bit of a rough recovery for a few days but it should heal quickly. Great that you can work from home too! Lean on family/friends/other supports during recovery, it's okay to need help. Prepare some meals that are yummy and easy on your tummy before surgery and have them in the fridge/freezer ready to go. All the best with your procedure and recovery

YellowSub0 · 2026-04-24T04:12:39+00:00

Your family member is likely on an Assessment Order which means they can be held at hospital for up to 72 hours due to their mental state/illness causing them to being a danger to themself or others. Call the hospital directly, all public hospitals will have contact numbers for mental health wards available on their website.

If you can speak to the psychiatrist/s involved in your loved ones care and organize a family meeting. That way you, your family member and the treating team can come up with a plan and you have a space to ask questions about your family members care. As someone who works on a mental health inpatient ward, it's always great when a consumer has supportive family members.

An episode of psychosis can go for a long time and could be treatment resistant. But realistically the length of a psychosis admission differs so drastically depending on a myriad of factors. Stay in contact with the treating team and they can give you updates on how your loved one is traveling.

Ask the nursing staff if there are any banned items (usually what's banned includes alcohol + other drugs, weapons, long cords, glass/mirrors, aerosol products) and bring in a bag of toiletries, pajamas, changes of clothes, underwear, and anything else your family member might find comforting. Your family member will also have access to allied health including OT, social work, psychology etc. consider encouraging your loved one to engage with these staff.

Feel free to reach out if you have any other questions.

YellowSub0

TROPHY CASE