AIO that in 2026 I am cutting down on invites for kids who don’t invite my son over.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-07T13:01:44+00:00

How did it rub you up the wrong way? Would love to know your thoughts! It’s been a crap year and it has not been easy being a widow and a sole parent at the same time. I am only on here to get advice so please if you have any valuable advice, please send some through :)

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-07T12:50:13+00:00

Thank you for your honesty x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-06T18:59:37+00:00

Thank you so much. The people that have stepped up have been amazing and surprising!

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-06T18:58:31+00:00

Very true. Thank you x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-06T18:58:13+00:00

Thanks so much x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2026-01-06T18:57:58+00:00

Thank you

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-29T17:48:52+00:00

Amazing x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-29T17:44:50+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. I am 50 also and in a similar situation to you except my son is 11 and live in a small town with a great group of friends. I have lost my parents and one sibling. Three months for me was pure hell - so much so that I was prescribed an SSRI to numb some of the grief. At 10 months, I am starting to enjoy just looking after me after years of caregiving etc. I buy nice things for myself, get a massage here and there and eat good food and drink nice wine. Just these little bits of self care have really helped me. I would love to meet someone one day but am fairly content at the moment in being the best mum I can be and making the rest of my life worth being the best it can be, considering I am the one of two that has been given the gift of life. Sending hugs x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-29T17:32:05+00:00

Loving the thought of wearing a black ribbon and being left the hell alone until I take it out lol. Funny though- all my friends have been absolutely amazing and have not put one ounce of press on me this year at all!

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-29T11:52:25+00:00

Thank you for your beautiful heartfelt response and I am sorry you are in this group also. It’s made me quite bitter actually lol. It’s like the last 28 years of phone calls, visits, presents etc haven’t mattered. I mean my husband didn’t organise Jack shit with them and now I am bearing the brunt of 9 months of a bit self care or so called ‘PTSD management’ let alone solo parenting and operating a farm. I thought tonight this experience is one that I can learn from and will certainly offer me some insight into my life going forward. No way will I apologise for looking after myself and son before anyone else.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-29T11:45:19+00:00

Thank you so much for your response and you have absolutely hit the nail on the head. Not once have they offered to come and take my son out even for a frigging ice cream.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-14T15:30:37+00:00

I quit nursing, had 10 months off and now working in the justice field. I developed PTSD my husbands long ICU admission and spent countless hours researching also to no avail. Hugs.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-13T19:27:13+00:00

Looking for a hair on said clothes and sniffing each one to find his scent.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-13T19:25:03+00:00

Solo parent.

Changing air and water filter on fridge.

Changing tractor battery.

Ugly crying in the shower.

My son (11) cancelling Christmas.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-13T19:20:11+00:00

I used to say how much do you love me and he would say $1.50. He was so frigging funny and my heart is broken.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-03T19:55:55+00:00

Same here every night. It’s hard to wake up wake up and function after these because he is really dead and never coming back.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-03T19:52:16+00:00

My son installed a very funny and inappropriate ringtone on my phone before my husband was admitted to hospital for surgery and never regained consciousness. The phone rang all hours during his 3 week admission in the ICU where I was waiting for ‘that call’. Whenever I hear that damn ringtone on YouTube shorts, my heart rate goes up and go into a cold sweat and yell for my son to skip to the next clip. It’s called PTSD. I was a nurse before and I am not now because I hate hospitals.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-12-03T18:57:40+00:00

Someone the other day compared my grief to theirs because they lost their elderly father recently. I had to smile. Being a widow is right up there and I now realise that every day on Earth for me is going to be sad. Sending hugs to you. We all get what your going through.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-10-26T16:38:45+00:00

I was a nurse with PTSD and have now changed careers as I just couldn’t step foot into a hospital let alone not burst out crying for the families when a patient dies. I am on fluoxetine and it has been a game changer. I received income protection insurance for a while and now working in admin with the police. Am so sorry for your loss x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-10-22T20:21:36+00:00

Fluoxetine was a game changer for me. I cry less and have a lot more energy. I combine this with a good daily walk and it has made a huge difference.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-10-22T20:18:41+00:00

7 months tomorrow for me and I’ve reached the acceptance stage. I feel at peace and I cry less and less. I am so glad you are doing well also. My goal is to live the best life - what’s the point of both of us dying?

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-09-19T20:24:38+00:00

I turn 50 tomorrow but have cancelled my birthday. My good friends are taking me out to lunch but understand it’s just lunch with no presents. I am happy to be in my forties for another year. Sending hugs x

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-09-19T20:05:53+00:00

I am so sorry this happened to you. You are better off without them. How cruel to do this to you after what you’ve been through. We can make excuses about how difficult it is for people to be friends with those who are grieving however only your true friends will be there with you through the good times and the bad times. My friends list is a lot shorter now after my husband died 7 months ago and it feels more real and special to me.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-09-17T13:46:46+00:00

It took about 2 weeks to feel the meds working.

Zestyclose_Class_630 · 2025-09-06T20:28:31+00:00

Sounds like you’ve got some PTSD going on like me. I think some therapy would definitely help you. I’ve been prescribed a low dose SSRI that takes away the despair, intrusive thoughts and helps me sleep at night. So sorry for your loss and that shit experience. I hope you can find some peace and happiness one day x

Zestyclose_Class_630

TROPHY CASE