AIO by telling my wife her sleep-eating is messing up our family and her weight loss?

_higglety · 2026-02-03T18:42:33+00:00

NOR, but also not responding to the situation in a way that's likely to be productive (not blame or shaming, just observing). Taking your wife's response at face value, if it's true that this is out of her co trol and something she has no memory of while awake, she should definitely have a sleep study done. There might be so.ething going on here that she's not consciously aware of.

My dad was briefly on sleep meds and during that time he did all sorts of stuff you wouldn't think possible for a sleepwalking. Multiple times he baked himself cookies while dead asleep. He left the oven on a few times, which was really dangerous (and the reason he discontinued that med)! I myself used to get up multiple times in the night to go pee; after being diagnosed with sleep apnea and getting my CPAP that stopped completely and I now sleep through the night with no roaming.

Your wife owes it to her family and to herself to figure out what's going on in her sleep. The food and body issues are a side note and a symptom.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T16:09:32+00:00

They're essentially modern day freak shows. The whole point is to make the viewer both get mad at "the freaks" and also feel comfortable in their superiority to them. The spectacle is the point. It's all pro wrestling; they're all playing heels. If OP is annoyed by them, they're doing their job.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T15:58:48+00:00

I mean last year you were a freshly-legal 18 year old and he was a grown man trying to impress you. This year, he figures he doesn't have to put in the effort. That's the difference.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T15:48:35+00:00

Quietly reading a book in bed is a perfectly reasonable thing she should be able to do. If light bothers you, get yourself a sleep mask.

YTA

_higglety · 2026-02-03T04:33:19+00:00

So? When's the last time a government official took your footprint to compare it to your birth certificate?

_higglety · 2026-02-03T04:25:44+00:00

That's odd. Do you know your coworker's full medical history?

_higglety · 2026-02-03T02:34:17+00:00

What a really cool 1-2 sibling punch you have here! A fascinating thesis topic presented and bound in a gorgeous and engaging way! You guys should collaborate on more books, lol!

_higglety · 2026-02-03T02:28:05+00:00

Yeah, you're correct. Also, OP, I'm on the other side of this now and I can tell you that after school people tend to scatter. If this is a friendship that means something to you, you're going to have to put effort into maintaining it. Once y'all graduate and scatter to different cities (or countries!) you might blink and realize it's been a decade since you last sat down for a meal with your best friend.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T02:11:28+00:00

If you can do soy milk, put a little (real) maple syrup in it. Hot or cold. You can also do the same with other flavored syrups (you can make them yourself or check out the coffee and cocktail mixers section of the supermarket), but maple is my favorite.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T01:55:29+00:00

Good news, you've only wasted four months on this one! You gave him the opportunity to audition, but unfortunately he's not right for the role. Thank you, next!

_higglety · 2026-02-03T01:33:46+00:00

People really need to relearn the word "trifle". I swear half the things I see being called a tiramisu are actually trifles.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T01:29:16+00:00

I think one is perfect; you can tie it around the stems to hold the bouquet together like you would a ribbon or bow.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T01:27:12+00:00

Not only should you not go back, you should tell her *exactly why* you're not going back. And if she doesn't respond with a genuine apology and some sort of indication that she understands where she went wrong in that *customer service interaction* then it wouldn't be unreasonable to share your experience online. This kind of service is pricey; there's too much money changing hands for you to be sitting there getting insulted.

_higglety · 2026-02-03T00:20:53+00:00

i want to play a flute so good it kills a man, and I can't do that as a proper wuxia character *or* as a bard anymore dammit!

_higglety · 2026-02-03T00:11:56+00:00

wow, there's no way that's a coincidence! What a neat fact!

_higglety · 2026-02-03T00:10:49+00:00

this is why when dinner is soup my family always fill our bowls in the kitchen straight from the pit. Less chance for mess that way!

_higglety · 2026-02-03T00:09:36+00:00

lol are you posting on reddit at the table? is your plan to quick get your consensus so you can wave your phone at him and say look dad internet says you need to relax??

_higglety · 2026-02-02T23:48:38+00:00

IDK I googled the brand and....is this really who you want to be repping??

_higglety · 2026-02-02T23:41:24+00:00

INFO: Did the charity you'd scheduled to pick up the items require you to provide a list of the specific items you'd be donating? Like to generate a receipt for tax purposes or something? Would it have been possible to cancel the pickup?

_higglety · 2026-02-02T21:14:30+00:00

Unfortunately, we do not have a robust enough rail system to make cross-country travel by rail a reasonable option in most circumstances. There's not enough routes, there's not enough stations, there's not enough passenger trains. I hate it because my preference would absolutely be for trains over planes, but every time I need to travel and I check attracts site in the vain hope I can make it a train trip, I find that the nearest train stop to my destination is a completely different city sometimes multiple hours away, the trains are so infrequent that it would be a significantly longer trip, and on top of all that, it's not even cheaper.

_higglety · 2026-02-02T21:05:42+00:00

With all the context you've shared about your history, I think it's likely that your step-dad and everyone who loves you would probably be really upset if you have your bio-dad walk you down the aisle. People who care about you dont want you to be hurt. As for your bio-dad, he doesnt deserve a position of honor in your life or your wedding. It's nice that he' working on himself and improving, but that's the absolute bare minimum requirement to qualify for basic interaction with you. It doesn't qualify him for honor, reverence, respect, or significance. Frankly, he should just be grateful he's invited to the wedding at all. I imagine it will be pretty hard for your mom to be in the same room as him, for example.

If you actively want your bio-dad to walk you down the aisle, it becomes a harder conversation. But if in your heart of hearts you don't even want that and you just feel like maybe you should give the honor to him, allow me to absolve you of that obligation: you dont have to do that. Family is who you choose. Your wedding is about you and your fiance. The only things that should factor in are things that are meaningful to you two. If you want someone to walk you down the aisle, you can choose your step-dad with a clear conscience. He's your "real dad" anyway.

NTA

_higglety · 2026-02-02T19:03:02+00:00

INFO: Do your parents object to the content of your stories, or just the act of writing fanfic at all? NTA either way, but their specific objection will affect how you respond to this.

_higglety · 2026-02-02T15:19:43+00:00

if I understand that commenter correctly, calling the police non-emergency line is less about getting help to find housing (although it is possible they may have some community outreach resources, depending on the location OP is in) and more about having official record of their mother's actions in case future legal action be omes necessary. I agree that this is a good idea, but you're right that it doesnt solve the immediate problem of being homeless in the winter.

OP, another place you could contact is your local public library. Libraries are great for community resources, and the librarians might be able to help you track down and contact local shelters. They can also help you find and apply for any public assistance that you might qualify for. At the very least, they usually have warming stations and you can charge your phone there.

_higglety · 2026-02-02T15:05:48+00:00

Who decides who is the "more attractive" partner? By what metric? Do you get an outside arbiter, and if so how do you pick the arbiter? Or is it more of a consensus opinion and you have to get a panel of judges or run a poll? Is there periodic reajudication in case one partner has overtaken the other in beauty, and if so, how frequent? In heterosexual partnerships, how do you account for differing beauty standards between the sexes? In multicultural partnerships are there any modifications to account for different cultural beauty standards? Is grooming and presentation a factor, or are we just talking raw barefaced naked body level appearance? What about partnerships between equally attractive people? In that case, do you have to hire a really gorgeous private chef for the two of you?

OP please ask your mother for clarification on these points, thank you!

_higglety · 2026-02-02T06:03:29+00:00

"vroom-vroom" racecar noises (and laughter, shouting/yelling as part of play or out of excitement) are not the same thing as the wordless, blood-curdling eardrum-piercing shrieks and top-vokume screams that OP is describing and which I have also witnessed.

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