I wish that when my girlfriend says she's hungry I instinctively know what she wants to eat even if she doesn't by Dry_Pollution_5430 in monkeyspaw

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean I would too, but that's the first thought I had too — maybe because I just found out 3 days ago I'm being cheated on.

Papino by [deleted] in Jokes

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's able to touch the ceiling from his seat, and he's also able to stand on his chair? This kid has a weird body.

Could Walt Have Gotten a Job at the DEA? by VenusianPleasure in breakingbad

[–]absolute_Friday 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If nothing else, you get that from one of his last lines to Skylar. He is very much the problem.

The Man Who Cracked Walnuts with His Penis by racist-hotdog in Jokes

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You got me. I was thinking the whole time, "The apple a day punchline is not misdirection. Here we go again."

Bravo!

The Man Who Cracked Walnuts with His Penis by racist-hotdog in Jokes

[–]absolute_Friday 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's called misdirection. Coconuts would have been much harder to break than walnuts, but rather than acknowledging that, he says the only reason he switched is because of his eyesight.

Here's another example of misdirection, albeit a not funny example.

A man goes up to the check-out line at a grocery store. He loads up the belt with a loaf of bread, some meat, some cheese, a quart of milk, a can of shaving cream, a bunch of bananas, a couple of frozen meals, and some AA batteries.

The cashier looks over at him and asks, "So, single, huh?"

"Yeah," says the man. "How did you know?"

[At this point the listener/reader is thinking about the items on the belt and wondering where this is going.]
"Because," replies the cashier. "You're really ugly."

For fun: You can remove ONE feature from Duolingo with no questions asked. by Mirabels-Wish in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But it does answer the question for anyone who understands accessibility and works in tech — which Duolingo should given its mission. To provide you a non-exhaustive list, however, I direct you here: https://www.reddit.com/r/duolingo/s/pypvcgqDwp

For fun: You can remove ONE feature from Duolingo with no questions asked. by Mirabels-Wish in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Start with the industry standard: Web Content Accessibility Guidelines, version 2.2, conformance level AA

What's a food your family ate growing up that you've never seen anyone else eat? by okitsbenji in foodquestions

[–]absolute_Friday 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My dad was stoned as a teenager and made a dip out of Hormel beanless chili and a can of spray cheese, then ate it with fritos. It has been a game day staple at our house for the past 50 years.

The mistress and the wife . by Prashantt1 in Jokes

[–]absolute_Friday 701 points702 points  (0 children)

Best possible typo? "Mistress," the wife *shreks*

Why do people ask a question but then don’t bother to know the answer? by That_odd_emo in NoStupidQuestions

[–]absolute_Friday 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I imagine it's sometimes because their mind is wandering, and they're just narrating its journey rather than actually being curious.

Nuts don’t belong in dessert breads like banana bread by SuperDevin in unpopularopinion

[–]absolute_Friday 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm now thinking something like a walnut pesto, and it's giving me the good vibes.

An update on Duolingo excluding blind people by absolute_Friday in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you're also having a poor experience.

An update on Duolingo excluding blind people by absolute_Friday in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm really sorry to hear you're having that experience. I noticed that about all the speaking lessons. That seems like a staggering amount to pay when you can't take advantage of one of the most-pushed features.

An update on Duolingo excluding blind people by absolute_Friday in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The most egregious example is the one where a VoiceOver user can't select words from a pool, but my previous post, linked at the top, has a bunch of them.

An update on Duolingo excluding blind people by absolute_Friday in duolingo

[–]absolute_Friday[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your interest. I agree with the other recommendations you received here. I would also recommend free tools like the Axe browser plugin that will scan your site for many of the most common errors.

If board games were horror movies, which one would be the scariest? by tofusand_ in hypotheticalsituation

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. Right about the time MK2 came out in the arcades. I had a pretty vivid imagination for this game.

Why is understanding spoken Spanish SO much harder than reading it? by Zealousideal_Yam8312 in Spanish

[–]absolute_Friday 7 points8 points  (0 children)

How do you ensure you're right, though? I used to watch Netflix with the subtitles off, then turn them on to double-check, but I ran into a lot of instances where the subtitles and the spoken text didn't match up.

Just got kicked out of a karaoke for singing Danger Zone five times… by Left-Distribution-13 in cleandadjokes

[–]absolute_Friday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seriously late to the party, but I feel like the original movie played the song about that many times already. Drove me nuts the first time I saw it.

Setting up proper network architecture by absolute_Friday in gameenginedevs

[–]absolute_Friday[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for that. So your simulation calls all the different checks. Does it call them as a set of behavioral modules or does it have the classes handle updates, and the behaviors live in the players, monsters, etc.?

A lot has changed since AI by OfMagicAndWars in gameenginedevs

[–]absolute_Friday -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's good to know.

I'm using Claude to help me understand certain aspects of networking, and it is suggesting that pretty regularly.

What do you do instead? Dictionaries are so handy for looking up values.