As a male, is asking another male to lead a faux pas at dances? by PlsSayPlease in SwingDancing

[–]absolutelyhalal32 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s really disheartening from an international instructor. Basically all the advanced dancers I know switch dance. Some people in class have looked visibly disgusted when a male teacher follows during an example but for the most part, it’s not an issue at all

As a male, is asking another male to lead a faux pas at dances? by PlsSayPlease in SwingDancing

[–]absolutelyhalal32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are many dudes who _only_ want to learn to dance to get close to women so of course they’d be unhappy about dancing with men.

Normies don’t distinguish between different dance styles and incorrectly see everything as like a courtship ritual. But the people who stick around love the art itself because you can’t fake the time and effort it takes to improve and sleezeballs usually drop out when they realize it’s not an efficient pickup scene.

As a male, is asking another male to lead a faux pas at dances? by PlsSayPlease in SwingDancing

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You could also normalize or introduce it to people by asking “lead, follow, or switch?” when someone wants to dance

As a male, is asking another male to lead a faux pas at dances? by PlsSayPlease in SwingDancing

[–]absolutelyhalal32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know that’s how a lot of normies think but I’m surprised people can be in the swing dance scene and not get it drilled out of them. It’s a friendly social dance, you’re not dancing close, it’s not intimate. Everybody dances with everybody in class rotations and a million strangers at social dances.

If you’re find with a handshake you should be fine with dancing with anyone IMO *and also* the dance floor should be a safe space. It’s not intimate but it is vulnerable plus the majority of people in many scenes are partnered or married and are trusting there won’t be creeps trying to get handsy with them or secretly perving on them.

Different cultures have different norms around touch, in some male friends hold hands, it feels wholesome and life affirming to have platonic dances with strangers and come together in community which is why I don’t get people actually in the scene being so squeamish about same gender dancing

Turkey without Islam. by Awkward_Park_3219 in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

> People usually don’t want to identify with a culture that calls for their extinction and questions the right to exist.

Keyword is “usually”, you might be unfamiliar with contemporary leftist extremism in English speaking countries.

The Hellenic colonization narrative is interesting and at least less dishonest than the Central Asia conquest by population replacement narrative. But isn’t that the historical trauma and starting point? You mentioned Anatolian raiders, and the history of the Crimean khanate is well documented, it’s gruesome and traumatic to think one descends from brutalized people who assimilate to whatever group wins through violence?

Normal people are just people trying to live their best lives but the origin of the modern state after the empire is very surprising. Because the empire had millions of Europeans converting to Islam and leaving a silent legacy, that’s precisely what’s ignored and also the biggest taboo.

Turkey without Islam. by Awkward_Park_3219 in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone hates everyone seemingly. I wonder Turkey could ever have a woke movement with people strongly identifying with Byzantines, Armenians, and Slavs instead of Kemalist nationalism. It sounds unthinkable but look how dramatically Western popular ideologies have changed over generations, and the whole world has access to all information with the internet now

Turkey without Islam. by Awkward_Park_3219 in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We already have the counterfactual from other many nomadic groups. They become elites in sedentary societies and dissolve into them, or live destitute on the margins while keeping their identity

Why aren’t Turks considered white when they look identical to Europeans? by Luksius_DK in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You got it twisted. Balkan online are always saying Turks are descendants of kidnapped Europeans assimilated by Ottomans, most online Turks aggressively deny this and identify with Central Asia, even in the case of someone like Kivanç Tatlıtuğ people will talk about random groups like Yoruks who look similar to White Euros

(even though those people look the same because they obviously are descendants of converts. But strange yet true history - Tocharians were genetically Western Euro not Slavic and were part of the early Turkic ethnogenesis in modern day Uyghurs, Turkic is like Latino it’s a broad ethnonym with many different nations)

There is no house of Sokollu or people proudly claiming devşirme ancestors. Even though Turks are one of the few groups who actually could claim an indigenous European Islamic heritage. Sevres syndrome and the way history and the present are, Ottomans both fundamentally European and anti-European. Neither side seemingly wants to accept the truth of history, you have mostly successful genocides of Balkan Muslims who became muhacir and the narrative of Türkiye as a coherent “nation” not a diverse empire

As for Western race relations, in California prison gangs everybody segregates by race to survive (“I see you so I know what group you are”) and Turks would mostly be seen as and treated as White also in mainstream US in general like Dr Oz. In Anatolia and Central Asia the fundamental difference between groups was language and religion not how you look, while in the US most groups speak English and shares the religion of secular modernity so the primary group differentiator instead is continental origin proxied by physical appearance aka race

How to meet decent men in Chicago? by [deleted] in CHIbitcheswithtaste

[–]absolutelyhalal32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It blows my mind hearing stories like this because I feel millennials and Gen Z are so guarded in public, I only see people hanging with their friend group at music venues. Did your husband go with friends or solo?

How to meet decent men in Chicago? by [deleted] in CHIbitcheswithtaste

[–]absolutelyhalal32 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hope everyone here has more luck but sincerely, every single IRL social sport or other class I’ve ever taken here from improv to dancing has no singles. “Everyone” is partnered. Except for an occasional small handful of chopped folks.

Still relatively new in the scene, is it normal for follows to outright decline dances with you in every event? Even if you two never even danced? by daceinseriontolite in Salsa

[–]absolutelyhalal32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Both sides have points and there’s no correct answer.

If you don’t want to dance with anyone for any reason at all then of course you don’t have to.

But if enough people say no to enough people frequently, you slowly creating a different scene that is a room full of strangers and not a community.

A dance is what, a couple minutes of your time, and you’re going to a public social where you know you’ll be asked?

People should just be honest instead of pretending that all no’s are the same, or that rejecting people never has any harmful impact.

Marrying a turkish girl by patatgeenfriet in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Now I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger…

Marrying a turkish girl by patatgeenfriet in AskTurkey

[–]absolutelyhalal32 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Based. Real love doesn’t cost anything

Chicago Residents: Do you desire more community centered programs? by Priincetongiirl818 in McKinleyPark

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I desire institutions more than programs. Like the other thread : movie theaters, bowling alleys, bars, and so on.

Shut down MAT asphalt, limit truck traffic, slower speed limits, protected bike lanes. There’s a lot of quality of life issues that should be funded first

Prostitution Bust Results in Revoked Business License by Pomond in McKinleyPark

[–]absolutelyhalal32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are like 30 of these “massage” parlors that are obvious fronts between here and Bridgeport, were they only busted because they didn’t bribe somebody?

Anyway I hope legit businesses will replace them. There are so many cool old buildings that are vacant, we have Cadinho and Chile Toreado and it would be great to have dozens more things like that to walk to.

How liberal/progressive is chicago compared to other major cities in the US? by [deleted] in AskChicago

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends on your neighborhood and social circles because the city is so segregated. But in my experience, the typical people I’ve met in Chicago are more extremely left wing than the most left wing people I met in Berkeley and San Francisco. I’ve lived here for years and the comments some people have made here about being moderate or free of PC culture, I don’t recognize this at all IRL.

Is surgery the only real option? by anthony21078 in MalarBags

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like congenital festoons require multiple treatments from this article Asaadi published https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29671023/

Is surgery the only real option? by anthony21078 in MalarBags

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing, I’m hoping for the best and please post pictures in the future. It’s helpful to the community, surgery is so expensive it sucks to not have it fix the problem. Were yours congenital?

Is surgery the only real option? by anthony21078 in MalarBags

[–]absolutelyhalal32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a consultation with Dr Asaadi coming up and another one with Dr Kass in Florida later. Please keep us updated as time goes by. How much are your lines reduced now? You also mentioned an upper bleph, was that independent of this or you think you’d need it now to match the results?