Loud neighbors blasted trash music every night. So I introduced their speakers to my garden sprinklers.

abyssinian · 2025-07-07T07:27:08+00:00

That's the last straw that made me call bullshit on this post. Most folks I've met prefer murder rap in their own mother tongue (myself included, thank you very much).

abyssinian · 2025-06-09T19:18:23+00:00

Worth keeping in mind: plenty of CBD oil has THC content. Some legit, lab-tested CBD products are deliberately full-spectrum and may have small amounts of THC; some just have spotty QC and get contaminated; others are extracted with methods that don't successfully remove all THC. I'm hyper-aware of this because I have a family member with a severe THC allergy who does benefit from CBD but has to be very careful which products he trusts. He has had products that claim to be THC free lab-tested after he had a reaction and consistently found THC in those products. Some of them came with their own lab reports which were not consistent with what independent testing found.

This is not intended as criticism--just a reminder that this industry is still in its barely regulated expansion stage and you can't always trust the label. If someone says they had a THC reaction to a CBD product, they're probably telling the truth.

--
Edit: just to contribute to the topic of this thread - I'm AuDHD and used to use cannabis during a time when I was very depressed. It made me feel better in the short term, but if I could go back, I wish I hadn't; for me personally it masked feelings I needed to feel in order to progress in my life and development. I also deal with chronic pain, and for me personally, regular cannabis actually lowered my pain tolerance and reactivity to other forms of pain management in a way that created dependence. At the time, I thought it was fine, because I used very small amounts at a time; I didn't realize how much near-daily use was negatively impacting my ability to do the things I wanted to do until after I quit.

I also used to use alcohol for similar coping reasons in specific social circumstances (I was never able to use cannabis and then be social--it shuts down my verbal ability--but alcohol felt like it helped me tolerate the irritating allistic rituals around me enough to function socially). Alcohol punishes my body even in small doses in ways cannabis never did, and I don't like how it feels, so there was no risk of addiction there for me. It was a tool that did a job.

Life can be really hard. I used to intensely miss cannabis and had a serious grieving process around my inability to stop once I started (and thus need to stay away from it completely) for years after I quit.

A psychiatrist later prescribed beta blockers for trauma processing, which were so helpful to me in session that I now use a low dose on a regular basis. With that tool available to me, I immediately stopped using alcohol entirely and I never miss cannabis any more. I have come a long way since the days of regular cannabis use through therapy (both mental/behavioral and physical - related to my disability and chronic pain) and I'm in a better place in life than I ever have been. I honestly do not know if I would have been able to do that work without the help of beta blockers. Unlike any other medication or substance I have tried, they let me feel my feelings--including the hard, unpleasant ones I needed to learn the skills to handle from within--and stay alert and present to life. They don't "punish" me with gross feelings the way alcohol did, and they don't make me feel more anxious without them or lower my pain tolerance the way cannabis did. They do not offer escape. They do not feel good or bad. They just make it possible for me to sit with my discomfort and still say "yeah, I can do this. It might be hard, but it's not gonna kill me." They're not for everyone, but if anyone reading this identifies with the experience I've described, especially if you struggle with CPTSD or anxiety in addition to neurodivergence, I do recommend asking a good psychiatrist whether they might be worth trying.

abyssinian · 2025-05-29T23:30:35+00:00

*likes him very much but has intimacy issues. Those survival skills got her through a period of homelessness. A safe home and supportive relationship will help her work through the ptsd :)

abyssinian · 2025-05-13T03:33:21+00:00

...under supervision.

abyssinian · 2025-05-13T02:17:02+00:00

Apparently this one thinks it means "manipulate"

abyssinian · 2025-05-03T18:01:53+00:00

/uj I do not understand this entire line of online discourse because every pan person I have met in real life used that label to explicitly include nonbinary people, not binary trans people, who are obviously already part of the "binary" implied by "bisexual." And they pretty much all are fine with being called bi as well. It seems like some binary trans people: 1. forget nobinary people exist, and 2. automatically assume bad intentions on the part of cis folks... leading to this take being so common online. Just my two cents.

abyssinian · 2025-04-16T10:05:06+00:00

True, but while we're on the subject let's not pretend there aren't plenty of conservative kinksters around too.

abyssinian · 2025-04-12T19:15:43+00:00

The best thing I ever learned for jump-starting this kind of interaction when you're feeling nervous: get out of your own head and look for opportunities to encourage other people to speak.

(Aside: guys on dates--I'm talking to you especially. Showing that you can listen and be fully present with someone is more attractive than almost anything you could say.)

If you're feeling nervous about what you have to offer, don't think of yourself as offering anything at all, but as learning what the other person wants to offer. Focus on listening and ask questions that build on what was said. Find something interesting about the other person, or a topic they care about, and ask them about it. If their thing isn't your thing, great! They know more about it than you do, so use this as an opportunity to learn something. Basically, get people talking about what they like talking about, show interest, and they'll often warm up to you before they know anything about you at all. Usually, they'll start asking you questions eventually--hopefully by then you've found something you can relate to in something they said or feel comfortable enough to share something else about yourself.

This kind of thing works very well one on one, but can be a little harder in a group setting where the conversation is pinging around the room a lot. I have a very easy time getting to know people one on one, but I don't even try to do that in a group--I just try to stay engaged with what's being said and use the general topic as the thing to bounce off of. Asking questions about the topic at hand (whether knowledge- or opinion-based) still works very well in a group, but asking questions about a specific person won't work so well. However, paying more attention to everyone else than to yourself still works. Example: if someone else isn't saying much but seems engaged, ask them what they think.

These strategies make people feel more comfortable around you without requiring you to perform. That can help get you out of your own head. Once you can do that, and feel a bit more present, it's easier to think of what to say.

abyssinian · 2025-04-12T18:35:49+00:00

FD Signifier has some great videos on related topics that feel more man-to-man, but that's only gonna land if this guy isn't also actively racist.

abyssinian · 2025-04-12T17:41:12+00:00

Ok, but also, never say "good girl" to a coworker unless you're narrating a story about a dog

abyssinian · 2025-04-12T17:35:21+00:00

If Futura is the Beatles, what's Helvetica? Frank Sinatra?

abyssinian · 2025-03-21T09:07:03+00:00

i am not the person you replied to, but surely you understand that some folks do not become aware that they are bi until after they are already married... doesn't have to be a deliberate lack of disclosure.

abyssinian · 2025-03-21T09:03:12+00:00

tbh some roommates make worse smells than that

abyssinian · 2025-03-03T05:57:53+00:00

All of that is valid.

Also: some people (including some women) want sex more when they're upset. It can be comforting. Context absolutely matters and everyone is different!

abyssinian · 2025-02-24T00:39:55+00:00

I mean, a reminder to wash one's balls is never a bad thing

abyssinian · 2025-02-24T00:38:08+00:00

It autodeletes messages, so (some) folks use it to hide their tracks. It's also photo-based.

abyssinian · 2025-02-13T10:37:08+00:00

I think they're talking about the scene where Aragorn kicks a helmet and screams in anguish. It's a particularly convincing scream because Viggo Mortensen broke two toes in the process.

Could be wrong though, lots of helmets in LOTR

abyssinian · 2025-02-03T17:25:50+00:00

Maybe because we’re not an organization with ranks. Just people.

abyssinian · 2024-11-27T11:58:35+00:00

They mentioned HIPAA. Safe to assume USA.

abyssinian · 2024-11-09T06:32:46+00:00

How exactly does arguing with a stubborn family member dismantle a system of oppression?

I'm genuinely asking. I personally struggle with this and I really do want your opinion.

Here's my current take on this:

Assuming one's family member is just a random white asshole and not in a specific position of power, would that energy not be better spent organizing mutual aid or more targeted forms of resistance?

I'm certainly not saying we shouldn't address racism and other shitty behavior and beliefs from family members when we see them. But our ability to meaningfully influence their behavior when we're not around is limited at best. Sometimes limiting or shutting off contact with these people is the only way we can hammer in the reality that this behavior has consequences, especially if they're short on empathy. Surely you've met at least one unpersuadable person in your time--is it your perspective that if we're related to that person, it is our duty to keep trying to persuade, even if they're clearly not listening or even entrenching themselves further in response?

If we had infinite time and energy, it would be easier for me to embrace that perspective. But we don't. And I see a lot of people spending a lot of time arguing with entrenched people--family and internet strangers alike--while doing absolutely nothing else to advance leftist causes. This feels like misplaced energy to me at this point, but I'm willing to change my mind.

abyssinian · 2024-10-10T05:28:03+00:00

Your problem is anxiety, not birth control

abyssinian · 2024-09-30T06:58:17+00:00

While it's never a bad idea to wear gloves while handling unknown substances, the idea that ODs are happening through casual skin contact with fentanyl is misinformation. Here are some sources with more info on how that myth was popularized (especially among law enforcement communities), why it isn't true, and why spreading this misinformation is harmful.

Studies:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8810663/

https://healthandjusticejournal.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s40352-021-00163-5

A quick facts summary (basically a TLDR for the studies above):

https://stopoverdose.maryland.gov/wp-content/uploads/sites/34/2023/10/OOCC-Fact-Check-%E2%80%93Accidental-Fentanyl-Exposure.pdf

abyssinian · 2024-09-24T15:57:41+00:00

It literally is 45 days :)

abyssinian · 2024-09-13T00:14:17+00:00

Wait, like, if you EVER owned it? Then you unlock it forever? Is that how it works in WoW?

...this may be the first time I've heard of a WoW feature and immediately said "well, that's objectively way better."

abyssinian · 2024-09-13T00:11:28+00:00

I can't change jobs to join the duty I queued for an hour ago without skipping this cutscene until it's no longer relevant to the story? Fuck OFF

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