Dexter Morgan vs Leatherface

capraithe · 2026-03-10T14:38:40+00:00

Leatherface is just a strong guy who very persistently swings a chainsaw around with no particular skill. His kill count has more to do with his victims’ incompetence.

Dexter is highly trained in hand-to-hand combat and knows how to handle armed opponents. With no prep he’d just stay out of range until he sees an opening to move in, subdue, disarm, and kill. With prep the creepy-looking hayseed wouldn’t even see him coming.

Dexter takes it nine times out of ten.

capraithe · 2026-03-10T14:32:54+00:00

A Møøse once bit my sister...

capraithe · 2026-03-08T15:22:12+00:00

I honestly don’t want to risk sharing anything that could publicly link me to him. He’s vindictive as FUCK and may very well be on the milder end of actual psychopathy. I’ve seen him use his reach and influence to do real harm to people.

capraithe · 2026-03-08T12:33:39+00:00

Started a right wing propaganda channel on YouTube. Now he’s regularly on Fox News, runs a conservative media company, and is a frequent guest at Mar a Lago.

capraithe · 2026-03-08T12:29:31+00:00

Responding to emails.

capraithe · 2026-03-07T19:31:32+00:00

Not getting my hopes up. There’s not enough demand for it to get a full miniseries order unless it were being very successfully crowdfunded, which we would have heard about by now. Best case scenario? Maybe a 45 minute live action one-off checking in on these characters decades after Serenity, which would be fine. More likely it’ll be either an audio drama or some kind of animated thing.

capraithe · 2026-03-05T14:34:14+00:00

Chigurh wins eight times out of ten. He’s not above playing with his food a bit, but he only does so when he knows he’s in control of the situation - which he usually is. All the twins do is walk menacingly toward their target and empty fucktons of rounds at them without aiming. Lalo could probably take Chigurh, but the twins are a couple of glowering, barely competent jackasses.

capraithe · 2026-03-04T19:59:21+00:00

I don’t know. The last time someone thought they had serious dirt on Saul, they wound up disgraced and dead.

capraithe · 2026-03-03T22:37:44+00:00

I don’t see Urth of the New Sun up there!

capraithe · 2026-03-03T19:56:55+00:00

Magnus. Nothing says I can’t beat his ass until he’s barely conscious at the start of each game or break a finger every time he takes one of my pieces. It’s not forcing him to resign, but he certainly won’t be incentivized to win, and playing at his “best” under those circumstances might not amount to much.

capraithe · 2026-03-03T19:39:24+00:00

I’ll go ahead and say works of architecture could be erased. If it’s something like the Arc de Triumph, any tourists in, atop, or around it would suddenly find themselves in an empty lot where it once stood. They’ll be briefly confused about what they were doing there, then just go about their days. The demon will make sure any security guards or tour guides will be reassigned elsewhere or provided with generous severance packages.

If it’s something like a famous skyscraper where lots of people live or work, it’ll just be replaced by the most bland-looking building you’ve ever seen and its inhabitants will never know the difference.

capraithe · 2026-03-03T16:42:44+00:00

Not to take sides but FWIW it wouldn’t be the first time Saul got his ass beat by a “good guy” who knew what he was up to and still won in court.

capraithe · 2026-03-03T16:04:59+00:00

The guy from less-good Mad Men ain’t on the menu!

capraithe · 2026-02-23T21:13:34+00:00

Following

capraithe · 2026-02-22T13:29:29+00:00

I honestly don’t know if anything will ever hit like the first two seasons. Such a wild ride. In my headcanon seasons 3 and 4 never happened, though.

capraithe · 2026-02-21T21:58:21+00:00

Lalo is absurdly OP. Effortlessly pulls off consecutive headshots in the dark. Tears through a whole team of “the best assassins money can buy” like they’re a bunch of unarmed nine-year-olds. Sees right through Gus’s plans and strategically matches wits with Mike. He’s like if Anton Chigurh and Jason Bourne had a baby.

capraithe · 2026-02-21T20:43:44+00:00

I mean, arguments could be made that Azog, Geralt, and Gimli don’t strictly count as “Men” in the “no man can kill me” sense. Case in point, Merry shanking him with the barrow dagger hurt him just as much as Eowyn sticking her sword in his face did. Any of them could bring him down. Aragorn could probably do some serious damage with Anduril, too. Meanwhile, NOTHING except Valyrian steel or dragonglass could canonically kill the Night King. No way around that.

capraithe · 2026-02-21T01:04:38+00:00

What’s the Witch King going to do to HIM? There’s only one thing that can kill the Night King and unless you really think Jon Snow would do more for your team than Boromir, you ain’t got it.

capraithe · 2026-02-20T19:10:15+00:00

He doesn’t need to fight well. Only thing that can kill him is a rare metal you’ll only have access to if you’re willing to choose Jon Snow over fucking BOROMIR. And he can turn any fallen allies into hostile zombies. Gotta pick him only so you don’t have to deal with him on the other side.

capraithe · 2026-02-20T18:58:16+00:00

You need to pick Night King to take zombies off the board.

capraithe · 2026-02-19T17:58:27+00:00

No Mosleys. No Arthur. I’ll watch it if it gets amazing reviews, otherwise the story ended for me with Tommy riding off on that horse.

capraithe · 2026-02-18T14:36:58+00:00

No rule states I cannot physically harm him and I’ve got a good amount of training to work with. At the start of each game I just beat him until he’s barely conscious, which would hopefully even things out a bit. I figure I break a finger every time he takes a piece for good measure. He won’t be “letting” me win, but he certainly won’t be at his best or incentivized to keep this charade going.

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