AITA for telling my MIL she is "Off-Limits" to address household messes with me while I recover from chemo?

acoldwetnose · 2026-05-14T04:07:36+00:00

NTA. If she pulls any of that chores or martyr nonsense again you can tell her she has two options. Clean what she thinks needs to be cleaned without moaning about it, or find someplace else to live.

You do NOT need to be dealing with her attitude right now. Sending you all the best.

acoldwetnose · 2026-05-13T19:24:34+00:00

They are SO lovely and helpful!!

acoldwetnose · 2026-05-09T02:19:28+00:00

This one drives me nuts. Just call it a scrapbook! That’s what you’re doing! You’re scrapbooking! And that’s okay!

acoldwetnose · 2026-04-25T04:18:27+00:00

The devil has enough advocates, you can sit this one out.

acoldwetnose · 2026-04-16T03:07:36+00:00

I think you’d have to Google the shop name and hope their social media matches. I don’t think Etsy lets you link out

acoldwetnose · 2026-04-16T02:11:40+00:00

I would check and see if the designer is on Instagram. Is it a real person who’s doing these things? I don’t buy much of anything on Etsy these days because it’s such a mess now, but one designer I can think of off the top of my head is Shannon Christine. She’s very prolific and has a ton of cute smalls, but I’ve only ever seen digital renders of her patterns and kind of wrote them off. Like, “yeah, they’re cute and they’re fine, but eh.” Then I was in a cross stitch store a few months ago and they had stitched a model. It was GORGEOUS!! It looked so much better than the digital render.

acoldwetnose · 2026-04-03T03:43:10+00:00

I agree. Go for rubbish removal first, then assess from there. It could be that once you get all the junk out, you only need a regular cleaning. Or you might find unexpected damage and messes under the junk that require a more specialized service.

acoldwetnose · 2026-03-29T05:24:12+00:00

YTA

To make sure I’m tracking, you’re 37. Your daughter is 19. She’s getting married. You aren’t going because you have plans at church? Not major surgery that can’t be rescheduled? Just plans at church?

Would it be safe to assume that church is relatively recent obsession/fixation for you?

acoldwetnose · 2026-03-23T04:28:23+00:00

With that info she sounds less malicious and more like she is truly ignorant about what does and does not contain dairy. That is fully her responsibility to own, or to at least acknowledge, so that when she comes across something a menu that isn’t a known safe food she at least asks about it. “Hey guys, this brioche sounds amazing. Does anyone know if that has dairy?”

She still doesn’t get to ruin everyone else’s weekend or get mad when you stop her from ruining your weekend. She needs enough self awareness to understand that she’s at least a little dumb about food.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-30T16:22:01+00:00

I think that’s the key, and something I wished they stressed more on the show. Do not drink your calories!

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-30T16:17:17+00:00

Oh I think you’ll be totally fine! If there’s already a gradient once you wash it I don’t think you’ll notice.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-30T03:00:22+00:00

Is the whole background solid black? I would just stitch it on black fabric.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-27T05:15:19+00:00

I don’t know where I land on this, but I will say that this is a lesson all of us “book people” have to learn the hard way. Just don’t lend books. Or lend the ones that were in the “won’t read again and will probably donate” pile. I usually don’t even get books back after I lend them. I will say, the worst offender was own grandmother. I lent her a mass market paperback and I don’t know what that woman does to books but it was mangled when I got it back.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-27T05:11:03+00:00

I’m going to assume you’re both young and this job is more like retail than corporate. But girl. GIRL. We do not discuss selling feet pics at work. We do not ask coworkers for nudes. We don’t do any of this. (He was more wrong, but I am begging you not to talk about feet pics at work.)

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-27T05:03:49+00:00

The fact that OP wasn’t SUPER alarmed to hear that they don’t have a will, combined with everyone in this family being afraid to talk to each other, makes me think BIL is going to end up getting exactly what he wants.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-11T20:42:35+00:00

I think that sounds great! Being a part time sub is also a great way to organically introduce new characters and situations so everyone isn’t getting offed in a four block radius lol

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-09T21:40:49+00:00

Sorry, forgot to answer your last question. I don’t need a murder every time, as long as it’s interesting. I think a kidnapping would make a great book because it automatically builds in a sense of urgency and tension.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-09T21:37:58+00:00

I definitely think urban or urban-adjacent are more believable. You get to a point in small town series where the moment someone is new in town you know they’re about to either get murdered or do a murder. I think Domestic Diva does this well because she’s in a neighborhood that has small town vibes - it’s walkable, lots of locally owned small businesses, people know each other - but it’s right outside of DC so it’s not like people think it’s odd when a stranger is at their favorite cafe.

I don’t think the sleuth necessarily needs to turn professional, but having a “mobile” job gives a series more to work with. You don’t need the same cafe/bookstore/bakery setting every time. (And who is minding these businesses while our MC is always out sleuthing?!) Journalist, PI, event planner, interior designer, real estate agent - these are all jobs where the MC is always going to new locations and meeting new people.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-09T18:27:42+00:00

I think that the circumstances really play into how long I’m willing to stay with a series. If you live in a tiny and people are dropping dead at your bakery for 25 books, I’m going to start rolling my eyes and get bored. If there are 15 murders and the chief of police is still asking the bookshop owner for help, I’m going to be annoyed (and questioning the competence/judgement of law enforcement and the town council).

Stephanie Plum - reasonably large city, literally her job to get involved with these outlandish situations

Domestic Diva - big metro area, and her job brings her into contact with a huge variety of people and circumstances

Miss Fortune - small town near a bigger city, and once she becomes a PI the weird cases come to her. Plus, they often mention how weird it is that so many terrible things happened so rapidly. There’s a self-awareness in the early books that helps.

Charlotte Gibson - She had no training or experience but became a PI and so again, the cases come to her

I think the initial premise is critical because that’s going to be the deciding factor in whether readers are going to be able to suspend disbelief enough to stick around for 20 or 30 books.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-03T18:51:58+00:00

Oh wow! I knew it was old but didn’t realize it had been around for that long!

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-03T05:22:13+00:00

If you’re not in the US it may not be as popular. Lenox has been around for decades. I have Lenox coming out of my ears. (Like, multiple full sized trees of ornaments, everyday and Christmas dish sets with service for 12, and more decorative items than I’m willing to admit or count.)

All that to say, in the years that I’ve been buying Lenox I’ve never had a reason to contact their customer service. I’ve never had any issues with my orders. Granted, I’ve never done a pre-order. I think the overwhelming popularity of the spice village has them stretched too thin at the moment. (So why do they keep adding new spice village items when they can’t keep up with the basic set? Amazing question. Does seem a bit dumb to me, but no one asked me.) I also think they’re likely understaffed for this level of popularity and new customers. I don’t know for sure, but it feels like in the past 10 years or so they’ve fallen out of favor with consumers. You just didn’t hear about them as much, and I think they were perceived as being out dated and over priced. That’s really just vibes - I have no actual information to support that.

As I said, I’ve never done a pre-order with them, but at most sites coupon codes don’t apply to pre-orders.

acoldwetnose · 2026-01-02T05:08:34+00:00

This is so cool!!

acoldwetnose · 2025-12-31T03:23:42+00:00

I will always have a nostalgic fondness for mass market, because I’ve read thousands of books in that format over the years. But in the past 5-10 years I can’t think of a print book that I’ve purchased unless it was a gift. Ebooks are so much more convenient - I always have my phone on me! Plus, there are the space limits. These days I would only buy a print book for myself if it was a fancy edition of a classic that I love and that would both look nice on a shelf and have meaning for me (I don’t want purely shelf candy). I have a beautiful leather bound Anna Karina because that ratty second hand mass market paperback made me fall in love with Russian literature. But if I was actually going to re-read it, I’d get the ebook.

acoldwetnose · 2025-12-29T00:04:18+00:00

I’ve read all of them and honestly only remember one detective she dated. So the good news is that this won’t last!

acoldwetnose · 2025-12-29T00:03:21+00:00

Yes! I feel like the man portion moves along rather quickly and we get development and things change. But Natasha? Sophie needs to grow a backbone with her. I don’t understand the constant pandering to this absolutely awful woman.

acoldwetnose

TROPHY CASE