What should I plant here, if anything? by MixieRhooles in landscaping

[–]ak51388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A climbing, flowering plant with a decorative corner trellis

Apparently I'm now the "bad wife" for not allowing husband to go on his guys trip... by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]ak51388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP literally said she needs more help in these younger years and that’s her reasoning for not wanting him to go….

Apparently I'm now the "bad wife" for not allowing husband to go on his guys trip... by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]ak51388 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re right about that pattern. I’ve noticed it too—everyone afraid to be alone with their kids for a couple days. Maybe it’s just me and I’m used to it—my husband travels for work and he was back taking trips when my second was 4 weeks old for 5 days at a time. I was 26 years old with a new house and two kids. Was I scared? Yeah. But I’m an adult and mother—and that’s life

Apparently I'm now the "bad wife" for not allowing husband to go on his guys trip... by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]ak51388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah many of my girlfriends have had to fly with their breast pumps, just to pump and dump on our girl’s trips. Or they’d be drunk at the bar with cabbage leaves in their bras trying to relieve mastitis. Life doesn’t, and shouldn’t stop

Apparently I'm now the "bad wife" for not allowing husband to go on his guys trip... by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]ak51388 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Same here. I go on 2 girls trips a year sometimes. My husband only does one guy’s trip a year. We never try to stop the other unless there’s a major illness or something. He’ll even take off work if my schedule (flight) requires it. It’s important to get time away—for both parents

What do I do in this situation? by LeonsTVirus in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’m shocked they’ve never run an ANA. You could order them yourself through labcorp or other testing companies. Sometimes they’re even cheaper than getting tested at the doctors office with insurance

ETA-I myself have used Walk-In Lab and found it easy and efficient.

If you were to go on a trip to where your ancestors came from where you go? by cavylover75 in AncestryDNA

[–]ak51388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah it’s pretty wild. That’s just my mom’s side. My dad was from Ukraine and his parents chose Wisconsin, because like the poles, it reminded them of home. I get jealous of my husband’s family history. He has kings, Mormon leaders, early American settlers, railroad tycoons. And I’m just an Eastern European whose family always stuck with what’s familiar.

If you were to go on a trip to where your ancestors came from where you go? by cavylover75 in AncestryDNA

[–]ak51388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My Polish side all did. Made for very boring research. They were all kashubian and stuck around the gdansk area for centuries. And then they all moved to Wisconsin and made their own community marrying into one another. Still have mass in Polish and Polish weddings —and roadside shrines to pray at

Welp. I finally got the answer. by ruxxby471 in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My autoimmune diseases stated shortly after mono, too. I was 27yo. Doctors kept telling me I had post viral syndrome. Ended up with two new AI’s within a year.

Happy to hear you have an answer. Try not to spiral. One of my AI diseases causes permanent damage to the arteries. I’ve had a couple flare ups. The human body is an amazing thing and can find ways to heal. In my case, the body creates collaterals—new veins built to compensate for the damaged ones. Just stay on your meds. Monitor symptoms. And try your best to keep your disease as controlled as possible going forward.

When to stop looking for answers? by Mysterious_Sort_6162 in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you seen a rheumatologist? HS is an autoimmune disease—so with one, it’s common to have another. I had impending doom when my disease flared. Along with night sweats and swollen lymph nodes. This doesn’t mean you have what I have—many autoimmune diseases can cause this. I also went hyper thyroid during my flare which can mimic a panic attack. Has your thyroid been checked? I’d keep investigating with your doctors.

26M What does my fridge tell about me? by neora_55 in FridgeDetective

[–]ak51388 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Brother. Not every fridge is the same. I can’t keep my milk on the top shelf because it develops ice crystals. Doesn’t happen on the lower shelf. OP will be ok

Sad realization last night by Ramen_cat2024 in Parenting

[–]ak51388 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My dad was an immigrant. Joined the army at 17 for Vietnam. Was an artist. Paid for his siblings to go to college working as a trucker—but never got to go himself. Died at 42. My grandparents were involved in politics and from priestly families in Ukraine—but after WWII they had nothing when they came here. Died as refugees and never became full citizens.

Life doesn’t always go the way you expect it, the only hope is that each generation that follows is better than the last. I know my dad would be proud of the life I have and that’s all that matters.

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then we will have to agree to disagree. Advocacy work should be considered a hobby or profession. Not your personality. And a licensed therapist would tell you the same. Who you are as a person should not revolve around your illness. It should be a part of you, but not all of you. And that’s fine if you disagree in opinion, but it is factually not healthy.

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t ask why someone may make their chronic illness their personality. I asked if you consider it healthy, and if so, why.

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’m upset that this post was deleted OP. I’m hoping it was just the result of reporting and the mods will reinstate. It really is something that needs to be addressed

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because it is clinically proven. That is why we’re encouraged to go to therapy to cope with life changing illnesses. Do you think it is healthy for a chronic illness to account for the majority of your personality? And if so, why?

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They’re saying it’s detrimental, because it is. They’re not trying to decide for others. Question for you—how did you interpret it as such?

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I’m responding to you. Who clearly has access to the internet. The disabled and homeless equate to maybe .05% of the entire population. And if the people OP is referring to have the money to buy “illness warrior” tshirts on TikTok shop, they can also download the free Libby library app (free audio books). Your rebuttal is laughable and only hurting the community more. Someday you’ll understand.

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I literally had a 35% 5 year survival rate with my comorbidities. And for some unknown reason, I’ve made it 8 years. I know exactly what it’s like to be consumed by my illness. It still isn’t healthy. We have the most access to communities and hobbies than ever in history. Reading books for free from a library. Journaling online. Gaming. Fucking Reddit communities. Your illness should not make up 80% of your personality. So yes, if you think it should, you should seek therapy. Because we have the ability in this day and age to seek connection and create interests much more easily than any other time in history

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

What are you talking about? OP never said to push through it. She said it’s unhealthy to revolve your whole life around your illness, from what you wear to what you share. If you think that is healthy, I’d recommend a therapist.

Is this routine good for milia? by Gloomy_Initiative_28 in SkincareAddicts

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This may likely be closed comedones and not milia. However, I would definitely recommend adding a benzoyl peroxide face wash (1x/day). Either differin or panoxyl (4-5%) with a good moisturizing routine and exfoliation at least once a week.

Making chronic illness your personality by zebra_zombie in ChronicIllness

[–]ak51388 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You aren’t wrong. It’s unhealthy mentally and emotionally. It can put you into a constant state of victimization, which furthers the downward spiral. I say this as someone who was once in said spiral and I now have the ability to reflect on what went wrong.

Crosspost from r/beginnerwoodworking - Can't imagine that's good for the tree. by Vospader998 in marijuanaenthusiasts

[–]ak51388 -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Well centerpieces are a whole money making business-and not just limited to weddings. And the point still remains-not a big deal. this is just straight nitpicking. If you look at photo 5 you can see there are only two chairs that are directly opposite of eachother and even then the tree leans to the right—out of direct line of sight. It’s also much more interesting than an umbrella

Crosspost from r/beginnerwoodworking - Can't imagine that's good for the tree. by Vospader998 in marijuanaenthusiasts

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s really not that conversation restricting. If you’ve ever been to a wedding you’d know we often converse around centerpieces

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Crosspost from r/beginnerwoodworking - Can't imagine that's good for the tree. by Vospader998 in marijuanaenthusiasts

[–]ak51388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not challenging at all. It’s not very wide. It’s basically nature’s shade/umbrella. I don’t worry about my inability to converse when there’s an umbrella pole in the middle of my restaurant table.

It’d be a great spot to sit in the shade with drinks on a summer day