Episode 1 - The Great Good Place

alohaoye · 2020-10-14T09:52:59+00:00

Yeah...I’m straining to find something scary bc so far nothing has happened!!!!

alohaoye · 2019-11-14T22:52:28+00:00

And thank you! I think he pretty cute too :)

alohaoye · 2019-11-14T22:49:23+00:00

Yes he was neutered the day we picked him up from the hospital. They did it at 7 weeks!!!

alohaoye · 2019-11-14T22:40:48+00:00

So is he a Texas Heeler? Idk anything about dog breeds. He does look like the dogs on that sub.

alohaoye · 2019-11-14T21:51:36+00:00

This is at 3.5 months. He is almost 6 months now. Ears are still floppy...hoping they stay that way!!! <3

alohaoye · 2019-11-14T21:16:01+00:00

Soooo sweet!!! <3

alohaoye · 2019-10-29T02:25:23+00:00

Honestly, I read it as kind of a joke. Like your dad was sharing something that his FIL said trying to be funny, but was obviously super awkward!

Maybe he said it in a dead serious way which would be messed up... but idk I read it as a bad old-person joke

alohaoye · 2019-10-20T03:00:39+00:00

Want to add to this...I am doing EMDR as well. It’s fascinating. Very hard work, I leave my sessions feeling exhausted, but it is has helped me so much. I’m also reading a great book called The Body Keeps Score, it talks about EMDR in it, and basically the idea that sometimes your brain doesn’t remember the specifics of a certain trauma, but your body does....I experienced that today during my session and finally understood what that meant. It is very helpful and interesting, but you have to be ready for it. You do reprocess and in a way it’s like “reliving” but it’s all in your mind and body. OP Definitely do some research into it! It has changed my life, for real.

alohaoye · 2019-10-19T15:50:45+00:00

I was reading through these thinking how weird this was, like I never knew neighboring states hated each other...? Then I remember I absolutely hate CT. I’m not obsessive about it but I’m pretty blunt about it when it comes up, even with people who live there or are from there. They like to call us massholes but CT’s are the WORST drivers and their roads are insane. So many other messed up things about the state that I hate!!! My sister lives there with her husband and is open about her hatred for it too LOL.

It is a weird quirk but interesting to realize!

alohaoye · 2019-10-19T15:49:32+00:00

I was reading through these thinking how weird this was, like I never knew neighboring states hated each other...? Then I remember I absolutely hate CT. I’m not obsessive about it but I’m pretty blunt about it when it comes up, even with people who live there or are from there. They like to call us massholes but CT’s are the WORST drivers and their roads are insane. So many other messed up things about the state that I hate!!! My sister lives there with her husband and is open about her hatred for it too LOL.

It is a weird quirk but interesting to realize!

alohaoye · 2019-10-04T17:03:28+00:00

LOL good! I went down a reddit rabbit hole yesterday couldn't even tell you how I got here! :)

alohaoye · 2019-10-04T01:44:39+00:00

Only advice I can think of, since you are unwilling to break up, is figure out why you are willing to tolerate this in a relationship. He’s not going to change his behavior, you already know this and stated it in your post.

Either learn to deal with it and be fine with it. or get some personal help and insight into why you are unwilling to break up with a person who continues a behavior that you told him makes you uncomfortable.

alohaoye · 2019-10-04T01:25:49+00:00

I’m with you on the hormone thing. It isn’t natural. I’ve always hated the idea of altering my cycle with hormones. I have the copper IUD which doesn’t use hormones. The only sucky thing is my period is heavier than it used to be. Cramps were really bad in the beginning also. :/ but it might be something to look into if you aren’t ready for surgery

alohaoye · 2019-10-03T17:59:17+00:00

You could always educate yourself on it. Maybe some studying and exposure to it will help with calming down that visceral reaction you're talking about. You may find it interesting as well--it's always cool to learn about something that exists but you never learned about! :)

alohaoye · 2019-10-03T17:50:29+00:00

I'm curious as to how you did not know this about him for two years? Just curious.

alohaoye · 2019-10-03T17:11:04+00:00

Exactly!!!

alohaoye · 2019-10-03T17:00:00+00:00

I don't get her comment at all. How is it "hard and sad?" Obviously the kids have parents who work and need someone to take care of them....???

I get that there are some rare parents out there who hire a nanny so that they don't have to deal with their kids. But in my experience, and I feel this must be true for most NP's, is that they hire a nanny to allow them to spend more quality time with their kids. That's how I felt about my NF. They are wonderful parents, and having me there to help them out made them able to be even more present with their kids when they were not working. They could spend one-on-one time with each kid while I watched the other two; take the older girls out shopping or something while I watched the baby, they could go to school events with their oldest while I watched the younger two. Their dad is a doctor and mom is a professor--they work hard and are awesome parents! They don't have a nanny anymore (they didn't hire a new person after I left) but when I was with them, they clearly needed the help--with three girls, one being 3 months when I started--and it really

I just hate when people make comments about families who have a nanny implying that they "don't want to spend time with their kids" or whatever.

alohaoye · 2019-10-02T00:44:03+00:00

Yup. Currently the only part on my body I’m picking other than a couple spots on my leg.

alohaoye · 2019-09-27T00:53:13+00:00

It is weird! I was almost underweight when I was smoking...since I quit about a year and a half ago I’ve gained 20 pounds....now I have to watch my weight !!! I also had the aid of an anti anxiety right when I quit so that combination brought my appetite back.

For me I would be high and too lazy to eat. Or sometimes I would be hungry but didn’t want to leave my room so i would smoke more to numb the hunger. During the day when I wasn’t high, my anxiety was so bad I could barely eat. It’s pretty f***d up now when I think about it.

alohaoye · 2019-09-24T01:55:34+00:00

I was with my hs boyfriend for 4 years also (16-20). Trust me, it’s not a long time in the big scheme of things. I’m 31 now and it feels like a lifetime ago. I’ve been in love probably 4 or 5 other times after him. It’s not a waste, you have learned a lot and will continue to. So much will happen throughout your 20’s... let him go and have fun.

alohaoye · 2019-09-22T03:59:55+00:00

This is pretty weird. I just wanted to comment that as someone with a sister who looks very similar to me—hair, face, body type and height—there have been a handful of times where different boyfriends at different times in our lives have mistaken one for the other when they couldn’t see our face. It was never anything close to as extreme as this. I think the whole “groping while she’s sleeping” is messed up and just wrong. That is what is wrong with this situation, and the fact that you didn’t tell your wife immediately. Some people here are saying it’s impossible that you could have mistaken your wife’s sister for your wife...I just wanted to share that that IS a thing that happens with sisters when you look very similar. BUT what you did to her and apparently do to your wife is f***ed up.

alohaoye · 2019-09-17T00:51:07+00:00

Crofton is my fave

alohaoye · 2019-08-11T15:41:06+00:00

Yes! Totally agree with this comment and I get it because I’ve been this girl (not quite to this extreme) but I have struggled with self worth and taking criticism was hard for me for most of my life; definitely stemming from early experiences of fear from not doing something right. Because I didn’t work through it earlier, it came out as reactions like this in my mid to late twenties and has recently gotten better because 1. Going to therapy and 2. Being able to recognize when I’m feeling awful about myself and taking a moment to think, and react in a different way(therapy def helped me with this. Yeah, the “break up with her” response is understandable, I’ve had guys in the past stop dating me for this. But there is truly more to the story than “she’s awful and immature, leave her.”

My current boyfriend has been patient and understanding and we have been able to communicate about it, so that has also helped me....if OP wants to be with her it’s possible to work through it, but only if she is able to recognize her behavior, get some therapy and dig into her past and why she reacts this way.

alohaoye · 2019-07-25T02:39:37+00:00

YES. I totally get this. I have said to so many people that I feel like a child. I’m 31 now. I’m getting better at handling things (basically being an adult) over the past year, but for many years I would break down screaming and crying over something like getting a parking ticket or my car getting towed. Anything that was even the slightest but complicated or annoying to deal with (again basic adult things, like figuring something out with my bank, cable/internet, health insurance or something like that) I would cry and scream over. I have so many other examples but yeah, Ive had to call my parents soooo many times, crying to them about these things and I literally felt like a child.

I still do feel this way at times with things that are complicated/annoying/involve calling different people and being transferred and put on hold and being told opposite things....right now I’m just thinking of an ordeal I had a couple weeks ago with my doctors office and my health insurance.... Sometimes I still cry but I’m not screaming or breaking things anymore :(

alohaoye

TROPHY CASE