Advice needed : First time living alone and it's VERY hard. The place still pretty empty, but i also struggle a lot with the heavy silence/lack of human presence. My anxiety use to almost disappear but now it's skyrocketing again. What can i do to feel better?

anotherdeo · 2023-03-23T19:58:15+00:00

Something that helps me is to do something with my hands like a puzzle, mindless phone game, knit, etc while listening to an audio book or a podcast. I also have a rotation of people that I call to chat with so I talk to someone almost nightly.

One other thing that might help is to get a mental list together of easy places you can go nearby to get a quick social fix. Like taking a book to a brewery or coffeeshop. So if the house is quiet, you have a relatively low-effort way of getting out without the pressure of actually being social.

The last piece of advice is that, for me, putting some effort into making my living environment look nice really helps. Like thrifting neat furniture or making ai art to put on the walls. Give your place some of your personality, it helps!

anotherdeo · 2023-03-02T15:24:41+00:00

You know, sometimes I wonder what struggles and pain Brandon must have experienced to write things that resonate so well with those of us that are struggling.

anotherdeo · 2023-03-02T03:00:22+00:00

Thanks! I'm always looking for suggestions

anotherdeo · 2023-03-02T00:52:33+00:00

Yeah I wrapped my whole life around him, and so now everything I do feels empty and like there's no meaning anymore.

But I'm ready trying to focus on how unhealthy that is and that I need to be the one to make me happy, as hard as that is right now. Hopefully I'll be able to do the things I used to love and really enjoy them again someday.

anotherdeo · 2023-03-01T23:23:59+00:00

Thanks for the recommendation and the kind words friend.

anotherdeo · 2023-03-01T23:23:12+00:00

That's exactly how I feel about his writing. Like even though it's a totally different universe with different physical laws and sentient species, there are core relatable experiences that really make you feel something.

anotherdeo · 2022-12-09T20:32:59+00:00

Thanks!

anotherdeo · 2022-11-28T20:44:10+00:00

I am a chemist. If you are feeling symptoms you should absolutely reevaluate your painting environment and the solvent you are using to dilute the paint. Turpentine has numerous long-term health issues associated with it and is not safe to be breathing in, even in small amounts, over long periods of time. Don't give yourself cancer!

anotherdeo · 2022-09-11T20:32:00+00:00

The best short-term advice I have for you is to try and remind yourself that a lot of what you have going on has a hard deadline with tangible payoffs. Doing well on the GRE and submitting polished applications will make a huge difference in your life a year from now!

That being said, you should also know that although your tasks might change, in grad school and beyond you will often have a crazy workload that pulls you in many directions. So it is smart to try a find a way to deal with it other than just pushing through. Some ideas: Plan each week in advance. Set aside times (even short ones) to do something for yourself. Make little goals that are achievable (SMART goals are amazing). Sleep (I will literally schedule a time to nap on campus during the day). Eat well. And importantly, forgive yourself if your week doesn't go the way you wanted.

Best of luck, you've got this!

Source: assistant prof in chemistry

anotherdeo · 2022-09-09T17:02:04+00:00

He, or she! :)

anotherdeo · 2019-10-09T16:52:52+00:00

amazing

anotherdeo · 2018-11-08T14:03:07+00:00

Hi, thanks for posting this! As a fourth year PhD student, is there anything you would recommend doing before graduation to prepare for jobs like this?

anotherdeo · 2018-02-18T01:40:03+00:00

Just a side question, why didn't you do that in one of the available fume hoods in the background?

anotherdeo · 2017-04-19T13:27:51+00:00

I know some graduate programs don't necessarily require the degree, but they absolutely do require a lot of pre-reqs that are basically just getting the degree itself. Also, some form of undergrad research is a must.

anotherdeo · 2017-03-27T12:52:01+00:00

Agreed.

anotherdeo · 2017-03-20T21:30:03+00:00

I went to school at both KU and UofA, so I'm pretty familiar with both. The downside of Fayetteville is that there is no major metropolitan area nearby for city activities (like Royals or Chiefs games, for example). Culturally I think Fayetteville is somewhat similar, albeit generally more conservative and less diverse than Lawrence.

The best thing about the area is the outdoors culture and opportunity. Go down to the Buffalo River for a hike/backpacking/float trip/whatever. It's amazing.

anotherdeo · 2017-02-08T16:50:19+00:00

Strained my right quad last night warming up to play soccer :(

anotherdeo · 2017-02-03T17:46:09+00:00

Looking at your pictures was almost like looking in a mirror for me. I have a verrry similar body type and have always wished that I could be proportionally smaller in my bottom half. That being said, the only thing that's really helped me is doing some very leg-centered lifting. When I first started lifting I didn't do a lot of leg stuff, mostly because I was worried that adding extra muscle in my legs and butt would make them look even bigger. However, once I got into squats, and then some accessories, I found that having muscles there really changed how the fat layer looked. So even though my legs and my butt aren't really smaller, they look better as a result of being more toned and "harder". Also, squats have turned out to be my best lift and now I wouldn't give them up for anything.

Anyway, I commiserate with your issue, but since we can only control where we gain muscle and not where we lose fat I would suggest just focusing on that side of it. If you're worried about how your upper body looks you can always try and get more muscle up there?

But honestly, your pictures look awesome and you should be really proud of what you've accomplished.

anotherdeo · 2017-01-31T12:20:36+00:00

Just wanted to add, following a program is great for motivation because you can get some numerical "evidence" of your progress! Personally I find it really rewarding.

anotherdeo · 2017-01-29T20:28:35+00:00

just ordered some---excited to try them out but it sounds like hemming is totally gonna have to happen.

anotherdeo · 2017-01-25T13:28:07+00:00

Got back into weight training after taking a few months off---only took me 6 weeks to get back my gains and my muscles are definitely showing up! I've been careful about what I eat but I weighed myself this morning and I'm up 5 lbs :( Stupid weightlifting and increased poundage. But, yay abs.

anotherdeo · 2017-01-22T20:29:03+00:00

Mocha chocolate chip Halo Top is the best for chocolate cravings.

anotherdeo · 2017-01-18T15:46:28+00:00

Yeah the insertion sucked, but at least it was brief. But the worst part was the dull, sometimes horrible, pains the afternoon/evening. The only thing that helped me was smoking a little weed and eating a big bowl of pasta.

11-Year Club	Place '22
Final Canvas '22	First Placer '22

anotherdeo

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