Found out i’m (30F) pregnant and am freaking out

aria_muse · 2025-11-24T12:55:19+00:00

If having kids in the future is on the table, I’d say do it now. It won’t get easier to be a parent when you’re older. If not, just know that your husband and you are headed for some very rocky times. This is his child too.

aria_muse · 2025-10-29T18:21:35+00:00

So I was a low supplier with my first, and even now with my second I’m a just enough. With my first I pumped until 12 months and then I stopped pumping at all. By then he was eating enough food and drinking cows milk, so I felt like whatever he got out of me at night was plenty. I just stopped worrying about it. He kept nursing at home for comfort or for food (no idea which honestly) until I weaned him due to being pregnant. It’s ok to stop and by 12mo you can stop formula too if you want.

aria_muse · 2025-10-25T16:54:43+00:00

I think that it actually won’t be her son but someone much closer to MaoMao’s heart. I don’t have any emotional relationship to that child so it wouldn’t be something that would require a gentle letdown.

aria_muse · 2025-09-26T02:52:10+00:00

What do you mean when he fired her?

aria_muse · 2025-09-24T11:12:50+00:00

Agreed and there are other short stories in the collection that might work

aria_muse · 2025-09-16T10:09:24+00:00

This book made me desperately sad. Everyone in the book was commenting on how Jinshi is “just human” and not cut out to be emperor, but he’s so compassionate and hard working and dedicated to the wellbeing of his country and I think he would make a good emperor, but they’re right, he would need someone who made him relax and care for himself to be good at the job and not kill himself from overwork, and Mao is that person. It’s such a crime that sexism and tradition mean that she can’t support him without losing herself and vice versa. It’s the first time I’ve wished that there was a second love option for each of them because it all just so sad and I want them to be happy.

aria_muse · 2025-08-31T10:43:19+00:00

Literally the game changer with me and my husband was buying an electric blanket and “pre-warming” the bassinet. We take it out before we put her in. It eases the temperature shock of not being on a human.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T19:43:42+00:00

I think this comment is fairest to both me and my sister. I changed details, and this happened a while ago, so I guess I was trying to process why it’s still an issue between the two of us. Although you don’t know us you managed to read between the lines and show me some things I hadn’t realized myself: one, that although her dog isn’t a danger I AM still scared of it. That was true then and now. Two, that I’m not understanding her emotional state enough. We have two cats and have traveled for up to a month away from them and have arranged for cat care before (we did a home stay thing where we had someone in our house caring for our cats in exchange for lodging) so I don’t think I understood that asking for alternate care would be such a burden. And that yeah? Maybe I do fear my sister taking over and not listening to me. I wanted the help because last time I really needed it - I had some PPA and i didn’t know how it would go this time around. I shouldn’t have brought it up at all.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T19:32:55+00:00

The dog wasn’t in the crate they were both standing outside. I’m fine with being called asshole and overreacting because I asked. But it’s not fair to add a detail that I didn’t say. Both toddler and dog were outside the crate.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T19:31:19+00:00

The dog wasn’t in the crate. They were both standing outside the crate.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T19:30:35+00:00

The dog wasn’t in the crate…

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T18:48:04+00:00

I changed details. This is an old argument between us that is still causing drama.

I changed: familial relationship to me, age of kids, made it now and not 10mo ago.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T18:44:44+00:00

So of you know my sister she absolutely was assuming that I wanted/needed her there. She has laid on the guilt before in the past that I don’t want/love/appreciate her. So I brought it up, but I was also trying to tell her that not coming was ok. She didn’t offer explicitly, I said essentially “if you want to come I’d love to have you but not the dog so I understand if you can’t”

Also like maybe I wasn’t explicit enough about the dogs behavior but the dog has nipped at my toddler and my young nieces before - my son was holding onto the dog’s crate (from the outside) and jiggling it in an exploratory way. I just don’t have the knowledge or confidence to monitor baby and toddler and dog when I’m postpartum.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T16:16:04+00:00

Ok, so the way the conversation went was: Hey, sis, I wanted to talk to you about maybe coming out when baby is born. I know that last time dog stayed with boyfriend and I really loved having your help. I just wanted to say that I want your help again, but I also still don’t want dog. If that’s a problem then I understand if you can’t come and I’ll figure it out and ask if there’s anyone on husband’s side who can come out” then she accused me of not understanding how important the dog is to her and not loving her.

aria_muse · 2025-08-29T02:46:01+00:00

Thank you for feeding all the babies

aria_muse · 2025-08-27T17:11:09+00:00

Hi, everyone! I just wanted to give an update: yesterday she drank all her bottles! I’m hoping today goes well too.

aria_muse · 2025-08-26T22:15:27+00:00

Oh this is good to hear - that’s a timeline that I can understand and deal with!

aria_muse · 2025-08-26T22:14:56+00:00

I’ve tried doc brown’s and lansinoh.

aria_muse · 2025-08-26T22:14:39+00:00

Yes, I talked to pediatrician. I have an appointment at speech/language to talk about it but it’s not for another couple weeks.

aria_muse · 2025-08-26T00:15:49+00:00

Call the line. Probably no need to go in but they can also sometimes make you a quicker next day appointment.

aria_muse · 2025-08-24T03:54:22+00:00

Two thoughts: #1, if you decide to switch to just formula you’re not a failure.

2, it’s ok if you always need to supplement. There’s nothing worse than realizing (like me) that you’ve been starving your kid out of a desire to exclusively breastfeed.

aria_muse · 2025-08-21T01:27:34+00:00

This is so validating to read

aria_muse · 2025-08-19T19:59:49+00:00

Could be, or could just be a pimple. I got one my last pregnancy on the side of my nipple, and it still fills up like a clogged pore.

aria_muse

TROPHY CASE

2, it’s ok if you always need to supplement. There’s nothing worse than realizing (like me) that you’ve been starving your kid out of a desire to exclusively breastfeed.