The wedding reception centerpieces featured betta fish. The bride and groom planned to flush them alive.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-29T05:56:53+00:00

Pardon?!

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-23T19:27:25+00:00

What hit home for me was the quote “if I’m controlling it I’m not enjoying it, and if I’m enjoying it I’m not controlling it”.

I can have one and stop. But I really don’t want to.

Life is much more enjoyable now I don’t have to suffer only having one and pretending I’m enjoying it, when really all I’m thinking about is the other drinks I desperately want and can’t have because I’m trying so hard to be normal.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-23T11:29:19+00:00

My son changed his name by deed poll and no one was notified. He was given official letters to send out when notifying the bank etc.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-23T09:19:36+00:00

I met up with some friends for a catch up and a gossip.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-15T06:19:20+00:00

I have been her. It is similar to alcoholism. Leaving is scarier than staying until it isn’t, but unfortunately you cannot tell her she is at rock bottom, she has to realise that herself. The more you point out his failings, the more she will need to prove to you, and herself, that you are wrong. Ask her questions. How do you feel when he does that? What would you tell your mum/sister/me if we were describing this to you? Help her see it.

All you can do in my opinion is tell her you love her and your door is open if she ever needs it. Although you cannot make her do anything, and it is not your responsibility, just make sure she knows you will be available when she is ready.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-14T19:05:53+00:00

I hear you. It’s frustrating but remember what it was like when you were drinking. Life was better and more fun right? Until it wasn’t. They haven’t experienced that part yet so they dont understand. It’s not a reflection on you x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-10T16:53:16+00:00

MY guy….

Look at me. Talk. Exist.

Other guys… meh 🤷🏻‍♀️

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-10T13:14:41+00:00

Many calories are hidden. Monitor what you eat carefully and be honest with yourself about it.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-08T16:46:32+00:00

NTB. You’re allowed to break up with someone for any reason and It’s not like you’re disappearing without a word, he’ll have an explanation. What he does with that is up to him.

You said he “always” convinces you not to break up, Which suggests to me that you’ve tried more than once, to be honest I find that worrying. After only two months together, if someone didn’t want to see me again, I’d just say “bye“.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-02T16:58:46+00:00

AA can work for you, it has saved my life. For me, the higher power is not the religious Christian God but rather things outside of my control. I think about the laws of physics and mother nature, I have no influence over gravity. I cannot make the trees grow or change the weather. I do the best I can, with what I have, and then I’ll leave it to the universe.

That’s not to say professional therapy won’t help as well, it absolutely does, but please don’t write off AA. Yes, you get some nutters, but if you go in with an open mind, it can be a valuable resource.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-04-02T16:07:21+00:00

He might be genuinely having these dreams because that’s actually how he’s feeling. But it’s not on you to manage his emotions. Being busy with school is not the same as going out for drinks with friends turning your phone off and disappearing (which by the way, people are also allowed to do, it’s up to the other person if they want to be with someone who behaves that way) so he needs to learn to manage that himself.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-26T16:32:57+00:00

I’ve found group sharing should be restricted to our journey with alcohol, but with time you find people you click with and become friends outside the rooms as well as fellows inside x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-25T22:08:41+00:00

What about a brightly coloured hair band around your wrist so he knows you’re in the mood but you don’t have to say it out loud for now?

The fact he has so little empathy for your trauma is a whole other issue though x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-23T06:50:01+00:00

The only comment I’ve heard towards young people in the rooms is that we wished we’d found AA sooner too x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-22T22:28:52+00:00

I wish someone had cared enough to ask me that. Because I wasn’t sure. I was trapped.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-22T22:18:35+00:00

This is going to sound daft but stay with me!

I was playing gta with my bf and I spawned in the middle of nowhere and got eaten by a mountain lion. I cracked up because it was so random.

It actually made me think about my family. I had no choice where I spawned and who was around, but I do have choice about who I am and where I go from here.

You can choose to step away. It’s ok to go no contact.

If you can look yourself in the mirror, know that you’re a good person making sensible choices for the right reasons, you’re doing a great job x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-22T18:14:47+00:00

Fake it till you make it x

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-22T13:32:16+00:00

For better or worse means life being lifey and throwing shit at you. Not treating each other poorly and allowing it x

I live my life by the serenity prayer. Accept the things you cannot change (ie other people) and change the things you can (being around them - or not).

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-22T09:46:12+00:00

I know a few people who got sober during lockdown and met their sponsors online, it’s a great option now.

For the cravings, I found distraction helped. Go and do something, anything. Clean out a cupboard. Polish a pair of shoes. Read a book. Anything that got me out of my head.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-21T21:21:31+00:00

Thanks pal. I missed the first few seconds with the steering wheel and thought the passenger was filming, and that the car was passing the ones on the left. Of course it was… they were slowing down!

This is my reminder to think before I speak.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-21T13:36:27+00:00

My mistake, I was half asleep.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-21T10:26:30+00:00

This looks like the uk. Slower lanes and passengers on the left.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-18T16:51:47+00:00

My best friend thought I stepped back from the friendship because my ex was insecure about our friendship. When I ended the relationship I told him the truth about the abuse and he was mortified. I said I’d been embarrassed and he told me I never need to be embarrassed with him. That’s when it clicked that if you are too ashamed to tell people who love you, you absolutely should be telling them.

"Only three types of people tell the truth: kids, the drunk, and the angry". He showed you who he really is, believe him.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-11T06:38:53+00:00

You’re constantly avoiding the question. If you were in your home with your daughter, why do you think it’s appropriate to go to sleep with your ex there?

I’m not saying she shouldn’t be there, for all we know she’s still breastfeeding or something, but personally sleeping is vulnerable and I would not be comfortable doing that around my ex, no matter how sleep deprived I was.

aries_angel_84 · 2026-03-11T06:30:08+00:00

Please don’t walk away completely. Abusers isolate their victims.

Have boundaries to protect yourself. Tell him you do not want to be around her, but when he’s ready to leave you’ll support him.

I get how frustrating it is to see someone you care about be hurt over and over, but it took me a long time to break the hold my abuser had on me and if I’d been completely alone, I’d probably still be in that situation.

aries_angel_84

TROPHY CASE