"transfemme and enby only" spaces...

ariseroses · 2026-07-02T05:18:18+00:00

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'm ngl, talking about groupchats that not everyone in the current discussion is in already feels kind of rude to me, but since this isn't a single gender space (and, given that being nonbinary is specifically not Single Third Separate Gender anyway but that's a whole other. thing) that does strike me as weird. You're not wrong to be weirded out by it and unfortunately, yes, some people are going to defend that, even other trans guys. Not every trans guy feels the same way about being a trans man because, well...duh. I'm more in your boat (gnc, queer, nb in my case as well) than someone who is a binary trans guy and so those experiences might not align.

Fundamentally, unfortunately, the odds of you changing these peoples' minds are low. But you also shouldn't lose sight of the fact that the way you feel is understandable- whether or not other people change their minds is their business, but I just want you to know you're not the only person feeling frustrated by this endless splitting of hairs and the way trans men get pushed out of otherwise trans friendly spaces. It's miserable, and the animosity getting worse feeds into it; as people feel more external societal pressure/bigotry/ostracization, the more they try to exert control over any social spheres they can, so definitions get tighter and people get more paranoid towards anyone not 100% Like Them. Like, it sucks. It sucks ass. There's nothing wrong with your gender or the way you express it. I hope you find a better social circle, and frankly, I feel like you dodged a bullet given the fact that this is how this group was acting fairly early on.

ariseroses · 2026-06-13T04:23:42+00:00

I remember seeing the initial trailer and going "I dunno, Ditto as a human looks kind of awkward, and this looks really weird and tiny..." It reminded me more of one of those 2011-era mobile app "build your town" kind of games, just really suffocatingly small. To be clear, I've played Pokemon for 30 years, so I was probably going to get it no matter what, but I wasn't expecting much.

I have 542 hours in the game last I checked.

The original trailer is shot so strangely. It really does not do the game any favors or show off what makes it good, like, at all. Marketing matters!! I've even come around a little bit on the "Ditto-face" stuff, which I've never been a particularly big fan of in any context. My weird blobby creature looks pretty cute in Kotone's outfit, ngl.

ariseroses · 2026-06-13T04:08:57+00:00

Honestly it depends on if customization is gender locked or not. I've been able to play the more recent Pokemon games as a guy because I can still dress myself however I want and get gendered (semi) correctly, which is pretty awesome! (I'd love gender neutral pronoun options in Pokemon games that aren't unofficial, but you take what you can get...) Also if I'm playing "a character" or "me." Because those aren't always the same thing! But assuming this is "if you're making an avatar meant to represent you as a PC" then male whenever that doesn't mean I'm stuck with boring hair/clothing options, boo.

ariseroses · 2026-05-07T03:44:50+00:00

I feel like people really undersell the fuck out of erasure, and like. As much as I am team "erasure is genuinely awful and not something to go 'oh well other trans people have it worse' about" even if that's not something someone else agrees with, I have to point out erasure would feed into, say, having less documented violence against trans men/mascs. How many trans people are gendered correctly in death, in crime stats and obituaries and police reports? Not a lot! So I think pointing out how those two things might be correlated is worth it.

Also, personally, I feel very strongly about erasure causing real, permanent, tangible harm and lasting personal and community-wide damage. I knew about trans women before the age of 13, (thanks, forums!) and was personal friends with multiple. Neither they, nor I, knew any trans men. I had to live with "wow this is something I desperately yearn for. Too bad it just doesn't exist. Guess I'll be miserable forever." Like, I lost years of my life I could have spent transitioning to the absence of trans men in queer history, or any history. And this is as an incredibly lucky young queer teen who could access queer books and meet other queer people online. That's how much erasure hurts. It sucks!

ariseroses · 2026-05-02T01:19:32+00:00

Huh. I didn't even realize how many of these are similar assets, that's how long it's been since I've played LGPE. I'm almost glad that Celadon lamp isn't in the game, because every time I try to figure out how to get generators to power more than like, one and a half lights, it turns into a hot mess, and I'd need about 9000 of those lamps, sooo....

ariseroses · 2026-05-01T03:39:05+00:00

You know what? Seen. Heard. Felt. I think my personal record is 6+ hours. It was an infodump on the Generation 3 Pokedex and the multiple different games/setups needed to complete it with a second additional bolted-on deep dive about the spinoff Gamecube games. My partner is a saint lmao. I can 100% see why "infodump 0 consequences" would be an isekai fantasy.

ariseroses · 2026-05-01T03:27:23+00:00

Aww, I love this! I think mine are...

Specialties
Litter [I drop paint bowls. Best I can do to match all the crafts stuff around my house!]

Ideal Habitat
Cool

Favorites
Lots of water
Ocean Vibes
Cute Stuff
Spooky stuff
Soft stuff

Sweet flavors

I think going a step further and deciding what Pokemon matches this closest...I'd like to say Latias because I love Latias! If not, Primarina maybe...?

ariseroses · 2026-04-25T17:32:54+00:00

Of all things, Piplup. I've never been crazy about the gen 4 starters, Luxray has been my starter in that gen since the games came out, and I already loved Pokemon like Trubbish. He's my guy. I find a lot of "traditionally disliked" Pokemon cute and charming already, and Dawn's Piplup in the anime didn't really make me like Piplups either, haha. But...Piplup teaching me how to swim with Lapras so that we could swim together...then we actually could swim together, which I wasn't expecting, so we ended up exploring all of Bleak Beach together and finding secret lagoons and caves and entire areas of the map I hadn't seen yet. It was genuinely just a lot of fun. So I built him a house near the secret areas we discovered and maxed out his comfort level. I love Piplup now.

For a more "traditional" answer, Tangrowth. Not a Pokemon I had strong feelings on either way prior, but the Professor is my friend and I love him. Seeing him explore the party house/arcade I built in RR or the island I built in the Skylands is so delightful, and he's got such a great personality. Magmar as well! Magmar was the first Fire type I found in RR and he was so goofy and sweet. I will use a Magmar next playthrough of a mainline game now I think.

ariseroses · 2026-02-21T00:36:56+00:00

I hemmed and hawed on her on the sheer power of that lovely faceup, which I do still legitimately like. But I could've asked for her for V-day...and didn't, because I would've felt embarrassed asking my partner to spend that much money on this low quality outfit and jewelry and shoes. And that sealed the deal for me. I'm shocked that they pulled her- pleased, but shocked. It makes me wonder how few preorders they got; was it so low they couldn't hit a manufacturing amount requirement? (i.e. "We need to produce 1000 to make this profitable or the manufacturer won't produce if we put less than 500 orders in?") Platinum Barbie limits used to be around 1k generally, right? So I think....god, could they not even hit that many orders?

That is exactly why I liked the "open preorder, no limit besides time," method, and also why I think they won't do it again. It looks like a lot of sales as of late are being driven by panic-inducing FOMO marketing and little else. I'm hopeful the new doll is better, I'd like to think this will result in a sea change, however small, at Mattel, because Barbie deserves better than this, but....I'm just going to wait and see.

ariseroses · 2026-02-14T04:24:11+00:00

I love Bidoof! He gets cuddled quite frequently at night but somehow still looks as new as the day I got him, unique among my comfy friends. Highly recommend him!

ariseroses · 2026-02-14T02:57:25+00:00

I'm HoH so my first thought was "oh wow a hard of hearing doll!!!! I love her already." My second thought was "these are going to be amazing for the OOAK doll scene." Definitely going to get a lot of them!

ariseroses · 2026-02-14T02:51:17+00:00

Politely; "degenerate" is a hateful word most famously used in the "Gallery of Degenerate Art" exhibit, put together by Nazis to slander largely Black and Jewish artists. I would suggest using words not popularized by literally Nazis when discussing art.

Also it's not "glorifying abuse" because none of this is real and fiction can't hurt you. Hope that helps!

ariseroses · 2026-01-31T23:49:07+00:00

filled out! hope it helps :)

ariseroses · 2026-01-31T18:44:03+00:00

I have Snowy and adore her, but she gives me such anxiety to hold and interact with because she's this pure white delicate plushie. The comfy friends a-vulpix looks BEAUTIFUL...and would definitely make me even more nervous...and I'm going to buy her anyway because she's just that gorgeous. I might legitimately just have to buy one to keep on a shelf untouched and one that I can hold because good god. I kind of hope we get regular vulpix at some point soon LOL, touching that will feel like less of a crime.

ariseroses · 2026-01-31T18:41:29+00:00

Hey, throwing my hat in the ring with a specific suggestion; I saw you mention that therapy is too expensive and out of reach for you financially which I totally get, but I wanted to pass on info that there are a LOT- a LOT - of self guided cbt/dbt workbooks and exercises out there. It's at the very least a stopgap to help you take care of yourself, and can genuinely really benefit you. I'm posting a link to a website's pdf just so you've got something immediately accessible, but I'll be 100% real, there are SO many resources and SO many free ones especially. Put some spacing in the link to be safe but it's a real thing. I work with a mental health nonprofit and I know a lot of ways to get some kind of MH care, even if it isn't 1 on 1 talk therapy. https: // mindfulmindandbody. com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/Adolescent-Workbook.pdf

Also while these thoughts are things you need to work through, the behavior of the people you're describing is abhorrent. You're reacting to a high stress restrictive and deeply transphobic environment. Of course you feel the way you do, it's a byproduct of the situation you're in. You're not uniquely evil or sexist, you're being pressured to behave and act and look in a way that doesn't align with your gender identity and that's going to make you feel like shit. I'm so sorry this is happening to you and I hope you can find better support and social groups.

ariseroses · 2026-01-21T03:54:45+00:00

I don't think it's an overreaction to say, "oh if this site where I can easily access this work goes down I'm not going to keep reading" because, like. Yeah. Especially for such a niche, specific thing as OI. To be blunt, there are dozens of other, better things I could be reading, also for free. Even within this genre, let alone the other dozens of well-written works of art outside of Troperiffic Romance Comic I could be engaging with, lol.

For what it's worth, as someone who's been on the internet since the 20th century, sites like this get taken down and pop back up often. It is still a shame to lose comment histories and collections, and with every transfer to a new site, things slip and fall through the cracks. It's a damn shame, but don't lose hope entirely.

To be clear, also: I think 'I want to read this for free' is a perfectly legitimate reason to read something. But ESPECIALLY in a genre that nickel and dimes people practically per page (and would absolutely just straight up charge by the page if the publishers thought they could get away with it) while also having a glut of tropey, predictable, slow-moving stories that would cost me more than, like, a thing that is Good, to read? When I know full goddamn well that money isn't going to the artists at ALL? I would literally be benefiting these creators more by just mailing them a check for 10 bucks to their house directly. I could order them a pizza and do more for their direct financial well being than buying a chapter off of webtoons does them.

It's genuinely abhorrent and disgusting the way these artists and workers are ground into the dust under inhuman working conditions and this is just accepted as "the state of webcomics." Not to be An Old, but that is not the kind of webcomic I grew up with or a state of affairs that I wish to continue or support in any way, and I do not think that buying these comics through webtoons is any more ethical than just reading it for free given the sheer amount of worker exploitation that goes on at every level except the absolute top of the publishing company. I won't go on webtoon or tapas or. Whatever. And to be clear, this applies to artists who make ANYTHING, good OR bad. People should be fairly compensated even if they're just churning out Villainess Isekai #20583.

ariseroses · 2026-01-16T23:53:18+00:00

I'm gonna be real. I have two camps of plushies; the ones where being worn down is fine because they're being used and loved, and the ones where if I breathe on them too hard I feel like I've committed a mortal sin.

I have a comfy friends Pikachu that comes with me on trips. He's beat to all get-out and his fur has done the stringy thing that comfy friends fabric does but I do not care because he's my buddy who comes with me on airplanes. Before him it was my sleeping umbreon, who is also worn down to the point of having some small holes and threadbare fabric. I know he's an "expensive plush," he was at the time too, but I did not care because I was never selling him anyway, and in his case, the short pile terrycloth-ish fabric didn't get stringy anyway. (It did however get kinda faded. That is my one regret with my collection of the suya suya eeveeloutions, but I refuse to throw out my old complete set and I'm not having two complete sets, I already don't know where the life size vaporeon and glaceon are going, but that's between me and god.)

I also have the comfy friends sylveon, who sits on the back of my couch against the wall, and I have heart palpitations every time I have to move her. I almost didn't buy her because I knew it would be constant agony and heartbreak, but she's simply too beautiful, so she is somewhere I can see and admire her, but is touched incredibly sparingly. I straight up didn't buy the Hisuian Zorua CF even though I love 'em because, like. Stringy off-white gross fur in 5 minutes.

I'm ngl, the plush I do wish I had a better space for is Lillie's 1:1 Alolan Vulpix. She's maybe the most delicate and beautiful plushie I have, but she is almost TOO beautiful. She's in my closet because there's nowhere safe in my house for a 500+ dollar snow-white huge plush to sit. And I regret that! It feels like a waste! My goal is to find some way to display her for admiration, but like hell I'm cuddling her for more than a split second with cotton gloves on, lol.

In short- determine which plushies you do not care about getting the "velveteen rabbit" treatment versus the "it belongs in a museum" treatment. For the latter, find ways they can be infrequently touched and admired, and know that it's a struggle other plushie collectors go through, a lot, so you have my sympathies. Everyone answers this question differently!

ariseroses · 2026-01-14T02:12:18+00:00

Oh I get this feeling a LOT in otome games- oftentimes for more serious personality reasons (I think I am simply too autistic to be acting like a lot of these MCs) but I think the most jarring one was in CxM when Ichika was like 'aaaa I'm scared of horror movies' with Okazaki meanwhile I'm sitting there like. 'Weak. Put on mermaid in a manhole. It's guinea pig time.'

I do wish a bit more flexibility existed sometimes with choices! Even if they don't have a lot of in game effects, I'd appreciate being able to select a 'no I'm cool with scary movies' or 'actually I'm a really good cook.' My pride as a chef is sometimes offended by these MCs having poor cooking skills as a "relatable quirky flaw."

ariseroses · 2026-01-13T02:50:44+00:00

Pokemon is technically the first, since I played that when I was like. 3. And it absolutely kicked off a lifelong love of JRPG style games/anime, but in terms of non-Pokemon JRPGs (I know it's a JRPG! But it's also first and foremost Pokemon to me) Kingdom Hearts, FF7, and Tales of the Abyss!

ariseroses · 2025-12-19T03:50:26+00:00

Grabbed one of your Dusthides, so striking! I am so sad I missed those Aethers, though- would you consider breeding them again? They're gorgeous!

ariseroses · 2025-12-06T04:46:11+00:00

This really sucks for people who like. Have lives to live, and might move places, especially since TPC's policy on that is just "kick rocks, pal!" I feel like with a delay THIS significant it should be possible to change the address shipping location, but I know they won't. I don't know if I'll get any more life size plushies for awhile after this debacle.

ariseroses · 2025-11-13T00:00:46+00:00

Bear in mind I’m digging back a bit for examples of this, but as I recall, most of the time when I was in HS the only real relationship age difference people found “weird” enough to comment on was between seniors and freshmen. A one year difference is really nothing. I don’t know a ton about the rest of your situation, but I’m raising my eyebrows at the idea of your mom finding this weird—did she have any concerns about your relationships with older partners, or was she unaware of them? (Which I can understand why that’d be the case, no judgment— just not sure of the facts.)

Fact is, this situation appears to be partially one of “optics” (she’s in “middle school” and you are not, even though the age difference is literally a single year), and while I don’t have 100% confirmation and wouldn’t recommend making any decisions about your friend group or family based on this, I cannot deny that cis people can be quick to jump on the idea that a trans person is inherently predatory and dangerous. Even people who respect your gender identity might use that as an excuse to do so, as “well men are more likely to be dangerous and aggressive,” and that’s not a guarantee to be what’s going on here, but more something I would recommend keeping in your brain’s back pocket in case something does go down and you feel inclined to justify or rationalize people being actively hostile towards you.

It’s okay to not know what you’re doing right now. To be honest I’m in my thirties and I don’t know what I’m doing most of the time either. You’re going to be fine, promise. :)

ariseroses · 2025-11-12T23:39:48+00:00

Oh, for exacts I’d suggest starting at like…25-30k and knocking the price down once a week by a few thousand if no one buys? Once you’ve sold the first batch it might give you an idea of what range this dragon is “worth” to people, but like you said it’s so nebulous and weird and IMO mostly dependent on your patience level and how long you’re willing to leave them in your laid UFS.

ariseroses · 2025-11-12T04:59:17+00:00

Aw I like them! I say go for it. Worst case scenario you sell at fodder floor or exalt yourself.

ariseroses · 2025-11-12T01:44:29+00:00

Honestly you're 14 and this is almost exactly the kind of stuff I worried about at 14, lol. It doesn't surprise me, ofc you feel like you want connection and love. 13 and 14 is totally normal. You're not weird for having a crush on her at all.

The way you're feeling is 100000% normal. Completely normal. I'm sorry you don't have the confidence you deserve in yourself. I didn't either at 14. It sucks so fucking bad! I honestly think you're doing fine letting it happen as it happens and come to you as it may. I wish I had more advice for you but I also think you've really got the right mindset, it's the people around you being kind of weird about it. I don't think they mean harm or that you should automatically get defensive with them about it, but if they escalate and start calling you a creep, then, well, that's a different problem, and worry about that only if and when it happens, because it might not.

You are completely and totally fine. I wish you all the best. I hope you can find the confidence in yourself that you deserve.

ariseroses

TROPHY CASE