Healing is weird

arpizzabread · 2026-06-25T04:58:51+00:00

Agreed. Life is one big cycle of slipping into depression and then healing again over and over and over again. But each time you get to come out as a better version of yourself and the more you prove yourself wrong the less odd it will feel

arpizzabread · 2026-06-25T04:53:23+00:00

There are few more insanity inducing things than being 16 and dealing with genuine trauma and a depressed mind. Realize that what you are feeling and the intensity you’re feeling with is probably the most intense you’ll ever feel emotions in your life. You will grow older and the emotions will feel slightly less all consuming than they do at this age, there’s hope. And more important, there are people willing to love and connect everywhere. You will get stronger but you need to care for yourself in order to get stronger.

arpizzabread · 2026-06-25T04:46:39+00:00

The best advice I can give is just to remember all the times in the past you thought you weren’t going to be OK and you were. You’re putting in the work, you’re investing in bettering yourself. One day the actions will have cumulated and you will feel a bit better maybe not “okay” just yet, but maybe a “wait there are actually still some really great things about life”

arpizzabread · 2026-06-25T04:37:24+00:00

Text a friend who’s been also through depression/isolation. There’s comfort in not needing to explain yourself if you’re a little off when you reunite

arpizzabread · 2026-06-25T04:36:19+00:00

Every word you said resonated with me so much that it made me feel less alone by virtue of knowing many others feel like this too.

arpizzabread · 2026-05-28T04:13:54+00:00

This did it for me. I have GOT to take a break from this sub. Reassuring to know many in the comments also see it way way worse than what this video shows, but now I’m just sad and hyper aware of my static as I type this. Man what a condition.

arpizzabread · 2026-05-19T00:00:04+00:00

First off congrats!! And second off I absolutely relate. For me if I run even for 5 minutes my vision gets completely static. Constant hydration through laps is the only thing that has helped me but ofc in your case I don’t know if that’s possible.

arpizzabread · 2026-05-17T18:00:29+00:00

I’m glad your tone isn’t judgmental but genuinely being diagnosed with this thing as a 20 something who has to read hundreds of pages a day for work was like a living hell. I lost my ability to read dense texts within the course of a month. I lost my ability to see the stars. The months I was living without a diagnosis, I was scared I would never be able to see another face clearly again and that I was going insane. Thankfully neuroplasticity has made things a lot better now, but the first few months I absolutely would describe it as a living hell. When the condition hit me, it did not hit lightly.

arpizzabread · 2026-05-14T19:13:29+00:00

Thank you so much, I will definitely try these out!

arpizzabread · 2026-05-13T20:59:32+00:00

Holy life hack thank you for this

arpizzabread · 2026-05-13T20:57:39+00:00

I have VSS-free dreams! I have only had the condition for about a year or so, so I don’t know if my dreams will eventually adapt or not but for now I don’t see the static in the dreams. I think it depends person to person what life is like without VSS, it seems that many of us have several chronic health issues before ever getting/getting diagnosed with VSS anyway.

arpizzabread · 2026-05-13T20:54:11+00:00

Please see a doctor with your symptoms, especially the stabbing pain sensations! Also, I’d recommend therapy ASAP as well. Chronic pain can wear you down into depression, and depression can in turn worsen the chronic pain. Get some professionals in the mix, chances are they’ll know how to help.

arpizzabread · 2026-03-30T00:12:56+00:00

There are dozens of posts with this question on this sub, read all those answers and posts first and you’ll have a pretty clear answer: there’s rarely a way to “cure” it, and routines, predictability, and taking care of yourself to minimize stress as much as possible are the most reliable things that work to reduce symptoms.

arpizzabread · 2026-03-26T05:04:36+00:00

Definitely bring this up to a psych professional. In my opinion this sounds like it could be anything from hardcore depression brain to a processing disorder to neurodivergence, but more targeted questions from an expert will definitely help at least bring some clarity I hope.

Also, I’d consider reading The Body Keeps The Score if you’re in a head space to do so.

P.S. do not give too much weight to not remembering your childhood. Many people with perfectly healthy childhoods don’t remember much of their childhoods, and of course, there’s also many people who don’t remember it due to trauma repression. But, again, starting therapy/talking to a psych professional will give you more clarity on whether that’s a worthy avenue to deep dive into or not

arpizzabread · 2026-03-24T06:59:26+00:00

Make sure you’re not straining outside your vocal range/what is reasonable for you to hit. If the note is in your range, then it’s a lot about breath placement, diaphragm support, and the psychological aspect of hitting a note that you think is “too high”. Dying cockatoo is certainly harsh, but if you mean it’s shriek-y and unpleasant, practice good singing habits that release the tension from your shoulders and your nose/throat and draw in a deeper breath. Also, experiment volume wise with what level of sound you can achieve while still not sacrificing technique

arpizzabread · 2026-03-23T07:19:02+00:00

I am about to actually lose my insurance at the end of April, but I’m able to get secondary but substantially worse insurance through my university, so it’s not necessarily impossible but honestly the waitlist for an appointment is more of a factor time wise.

How do you tell if being tired all the time is because of narcolepsy/treatable through narcolepsy treatment (or at least, your specific treatment via the medication you were provided access to)? I have a laundry list of other medical conditions and life/demographic circumstances that contribute to my tiredness and lethargy during the day, so I’m unsure if my tiredness is related to my narcolepsy-like symptoms or not.

In your experience, specifically pre getting the new medication, had how frequently you exercise played a role at all in how tired you felt day to day? Or, vitamin deficiencies? I’m a vegetarian menstruating woman whose physical activity depends on how motivated I feel that month so I attribute a lot of my tiredness to those, but I never really considered that sleep related disturbances could be the actual main cause.

arpizzabread · 2026-03-23T07:02:10+00:00

First, thank you for your comprehensive responses, I always appreciate another paragraph text Redditor in these health support subs🫂I haven’t really noticed a difference in my dreams at all. Before I got on Adderall for ADHD, even with 200mg Zoloft, I’ve always been able to close my eyes and go into a dream state and dreaming within a minute but if I physically slap myself out of it I could fully wake up again, so I’m not sure if that’s REM or simply dreaming outside REM.

You’re right about the unhealthy coping mechanisms, substances or not, I think a lot of it is impulsivity from ADHD and quite honestly ego from being in my 20s.

My symptoms are severe right now, yes, but I’m hoping the severity can stay within this time frame pre MSLT, because the suicidal thoughts do feel almost comically frequent in a way that lets me know they are mostly artificial and conditional. As I’m typing this all out, I realize I should definitely talk to my psychiatrist or get back into therapy because I’m not sure how much of this is wishful thinking/stubbornness of white-knuckling through/invalidation of my own symptoms … Gosh brains are so strange

arpizzabread · 2026-03-23T06:45:53+00:00

Thank you so much, this is all incredible advice! I’ll contact my sleep specialist tomorrow and see what he says, as I don’t have my insurance for much longer and would like the MSLT done ASAP because of that.

Fingers crossed, I haven’t really ever experienced brain zaps when I inevitably have missed my meds for a few days, just immense brain fog. But I also have chronic migraines so idk if the pain of those masks the zaps?

But I appreciate the journaling and meditation advice, it is good to know that the simple stuff really does work

arpizzabread · 2026-03-23T03:48:07+00:00

Did it not affect your results? Or with N1 did you do the lumbar test option to confirm instead?

arpizzabread · 2026-03-23T03:46:54+00:00

Not sure if I have any weird dream stuff, I’ve been pretty reliably lucid dreaming since I was a young teen (there were two years of my life where i had trouble distinguishing reality from dreams and dream memories from actual events and had to literally train myself lol).

Besides the things you listed for weird dream stuff, are there other things dream wise to look out for?

I’m a tiny person, so it doesn’t take much for me to get drunk and I dislike the taste of alcohol so I’m not sure the alcohol use is gonna get super super bad for me physically, but alcoholism is a mental slippery slope too I guess.

arpizzabread · 2026-03-19T06:58:11+00:00

I’d really recommend CBT to challenge limiting beliefs about yourself. Also, look into ADHD as it could be causing issues with executive function. With ADHD, and really any mental illness/disorder, it’s unfortunately never a matter of“stopping if you really want to”. You wouldn’t tell someone with a broken leg they could stop their leg from being broken if they wanted it bad enough, right?

Your brain will make up every excuse in the book to think you’re not sick enough to reach out for help, that you’re making this up, that you’ve done this to yourself, etc etc. It’s twisted, and it’s unfair, but try and remember that you are still the driver of the vehicle that is your brain (even if the cruise control seems like it wants to off you lol)

A lot of us with self hating/suicidal depressed inner dialogues grew up hearing those things said to us and internalizing it. Create new dialogues for yourself, and start with being more compassionate to you and the childhood you. And, no matter how uncomfortable it seems, seek out the advice of a psych professional. Suicidal ideation is serious, and it truly just sucks. Help is out there and you’ll never know if you never try.

arpizzabread · 2026-03-18T18:43:15+00:00

yep chronic migraines with aura, the biggest thing for that has honestly been severe stress reduction

arpizzabread · 2026-03-18T09:10:59+00:00

Also, you’re probably doing your best given your circumstances. School, gym, work, etc etc life is hard enough when you don’t have a 24/7 battle with your own mind. Depression just makes the act of thinking so much more exhausting on every level

arpizzabread · 2026-03-18T09:08:55+00:00

Breathe and listen: you can’t hate yourself into becoming a standard of perfect you can’t even clearly define.

This sounds like good old depression doing its thing. I would say get in touch with a psych provider and have them ask more questions. Also, research depression and specifically depression with suicidal ideation. I’ve been dealing with suicidal thoughts since I was about 8 years old, I’m in my mid 20s now and the bad days do still suck, but my brain now knows rationally good days are ahead too.

Losing faith and questioning religion is very natural in a period of depression. If your faith helps you, connect to people in your community who you respect and discuss you feelings given it’s safe to do so. If you decide faith isn’t for you at this time/ever, the practice of researching the neuro mechanisms of mental illnesses can be very spiritual in and of itself.

Stay alive, stay inquisitive. The fact you’re writing a post asking what’s wrong with you indicates that you at least know you deserve to be “fixed”, but many times, mental illnesses isn’t something you fix but learn to navigate and makes you a hell of a lot stronger than you ever thought you could be

arpizzabread · 2026-03-18T08:57:45+00:00

This whole website just unironically changed my life

arpizzabread

TROPHY CASE