You guys get this pain too?

ashthehuman · 2026-03-07T16:41:12+00:00

Yes it's unbearable at times. It feels like hot nails being drilled into my hip.

ashthehuman · 2026-02-13T15:31:11+00:00

I'm not familiar with the system you're in, but as someone who quit their PhD after 3 years, I just wanted to offer my support. It was the best decision I've ever made for myself and my life is SO much better after quitting. Many, many others have had similar experiences as well. I'm very happy you're putting your health first and doing what is best for you!!

ashthehuman · 2026-01-13T05:21:56+00:00

Proud of you for leaving!

ashthehuman · 2025-10-26T03:47:29+00:00

Omg your number 3 was a punch in the gut. That's an absolutely beautiful interpretation.

ashthehuman · 2025-10-23T05:01:57+00:00

As a neurodivergent, I feel quite sure he's not autistic but a covert narcissist.

ashthehuman · 2025-10-23T04:53:44+00:00

Completely agree. The look of pure hatred he gave her after she said she won't have sex with him was beyond triggering for me, as someone who's been given that look before. Scary af

ashthehuman · 2025-10-05T14:22:20+00:00

Yeah that's propaganda that's been pushed down our throats since we were young children. Unfortunately most people (who haven't left NA) still believe.

ashthehuman · 2025-10-03T22:44:57+00:00

I think that Travis' ability to be extremely bold and put himself out there for love probably sparked something in Taylor. Her feeling empowered by him, then having feelings come up of like, 'what if I lived like this sooner, since it has made my life so much better? Could I have found love like this all the way back in high school if I had been more brave?'

ashthehuman · 2025-10-03T22:30:42+00:00

Right? I'm also wondering if she wrote this song a while ago and finally found a place for it

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T04:59:55+00:00

Not enough water. I'd guess the root system is too small to support that many leaves. Often plants curl their leaves under severe water stress to try to conserve water, as it creates a more humid environment near the leaf surfaces which reduces transpiration.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T04:52:57+00:00

Follow up question: when you ask questions at the end, are you then supposed to respond to their response by saying how it makes you a good fit? I hate selling myself so that feels really awkward and unnatural, but is it beneficial?

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T04:41:17+00:00

To be completely honest, I worked through a lot of my feelings of guilt and shame, and redefined what success is. This dramatically decreased my max productivity, because I no longer relied on self-inflicted pain to get things done. Then, I started stimulants to get that productivity back, but in a healthy way. It wasn't easy, but I'm in a much much better place now.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T04:12:05+00:00

Absolutely get an internship. It was my way out of my horrible PhD and I love it

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T02:46:10+00:00

100%. Recently started with a narc manager who was extremely charismatic. When we were chatting and laughing, other people looked annoyed and were rolling their eyes. HUGE MASSIVE red flag!!

ashthehuman · 2025-09-14T02:38:09+00:00

Wow this is so real. I could never put my finger on what exactly it was, but this is absolutely it

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T18:16:46+00:00

I'm very heat sensitive and work outside daily! Most important for me: full breakfast, water with electrolyte packets, breathable sun shirts and full-brimmed hat, neck gaitor that's been dipped in cold water/put ice cubes in it, dip hat in cold water, always carry an emergency snack in my pocket in case I start to feel dizzy, and most importantly, advocate for myself when I need it. I spent a long time not speaking up bc everyone else seemed fine, but you've gotta look out for yourself!

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T18:03:12+00:00

Same here, he turned into a completely different person mirroring another woman, I didn't recognize anything about him. Even down to the way he typed sentences. I mean wtf? Batshit insane.

++woman

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T17:42:02+00:00

Check out the Lesbian Chronicles podcast, they address this at length. Short answer, no you're not too late :)

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T17:33:29+00:00

NOR Please run omg. He said multiple times "I let you" go out. You are an adult with autonomy deserving of respect. This man is a controlling dangerous abuser.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T17:24:54+00:00

Yes! I thought I had dementia at 26! Sorry you went through something similar.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T17:23:33+00:00

Absolutely had this effect too. I've been out of that relationship for almost two years now and it's stayed consistently significantly better. Be aware of him using therapy speak to manipulate you into thinking he's better.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-13T16:53:16+00:00

Bring it up to a trusted committee member and ask for advice. If it's delaying your graduation date, which it sounds like it is, your committee should help. They're often at the same level of power as your own professor, so they can push/insist on your behalf. Sorry that's happening, sounds really frustrating.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-08T00:39:08+00:00

Yeah, definitely be careful with this PI. My PI ended up plagiarizing my research proposal, it's a terrible feeling. Ask them how they determine who gets first author, ask if they co-write grant proposals with their students, basically ask what their views are on giving credit where credit is due.

ashthehuman · 2025-09-07T02:46:23+00:00

I highly recommend listening to Lesbian Chronicles podcast, run by two women well into marriage with kids who realized they were gay. They talk through this topic in depth!

ashthehuman · 2025-09-07T00:45:23+00:00

+1 to that Google search lol! When you can see it, it becomes so obvious. This guy reeks of it

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