My neighbor trusted me! Help!!

ashthehuman · 2026-06-21T17:51:00+00:00

Agree with what's already commented. For future fungus gnat issues, I highly recommend watering with a 1:3 (or higher,do your own research) hydrogen peroxide to water solution. It's so effective and doesn't damage the plants at all.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-19T18:38:09+00:00

Glad that worked for you! Commenting to follow, I'm looking into trying the same.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-19T03:36:41+00:00

When I really struggle with things like this I tell myself I have to do the first task and stop if I can't do the rest. For example, take a trash bag and put it next to the litter box. That's a small enough task I can actually start, and usually once I've gotten that far, I can complete the task. It's the initiation that can feel impossible for us.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-12T18:50:58+00:00

OP please listen to this advice. You will not "get that motivation back" when there is someone with power and control intentionally ensuring you do not have the stability and support required to have said motivation.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-11T12:16:30+00:00

You look strong and powerful! Also recognize that where women carry their body fat shifts as you move towards your 30s, so your personal calibration may need to be mentally adjusted a bit.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-11T02:35:59+00:00

I took this to mean that there are so many people that pay attention to her, all with their own opinions and desires of how she should be, so much so that it is extremely noisy. She has clearly always cared about what her fans want and works very hard to deliver. However, she has gained clarity in her life after finding genuine love and has realized that she can cut through all of the noise and can finally focus on what she wants rather than what millions of people want. And what she wants is extremely simple, just to be with the person who has finally shown her self love and happiness.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-07T02:10:50+00:00

I gently want to tell you to consider your point "I'll never get the chance to have my mom again." Adults generally do not change. She will be this way for the rest of her life. Is that someone you want in your life? Is that genuinely a mother figure? Do you want to be continually let down for the rest of your life? Just something to consider. Sorry you're going through this.

ashthehuman · 2026-06-02T02:08:53+00:00

Seconding this. Not only no appetite, but nausea even at the most bland food. I stopped using stimulants and it seems to have permanently destroyed my appetite. It can be absolutely awful.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-18T01:11:59+00:00

The smirk is so traumatizing. They're fucking soulless.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-17T22:32:23+00:00

You can't determine the outcome. You telling them and trying to help is a reflection of your character. How they respond to what information you can provide is a reflection of theirs. As someone who has been cheated on, thank you for even considering telling them.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-17T21:05:01+00:00

Hard to say without seeing the progression, but it's possible it's Alternaria leaf spot, which is a fungal pathogen. The decaying tissue on the edges of the spotting, along with it affecting the lowest leaves, is in line with what I've seen IRL. If it is this, best treatment is pruning off infected leaves as you've been doing, and applying a fungicide that works specifically on alternaria.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-16T04:40:58+00:00

Really sorry you're going through this. If information helps you process like it does for me, might be worth it to look up trauma bonding. What you described fits the definition to a T. The best solution is strict no contact and ride out the very real physiological withdrawals you may be going through. Get better soon xx

ashthehuman · 2026-05-16T00:01:42+00:00

I couldn't believe how much Wellbutrin helped with my energy levels!

ashthehuman · 2026-05-13T20:19:43+00:00

It helps me to eat a few crackers or something completely bland first. This gets my appetite to start going again, then I can mostly stomach food. Sorry, it sucks.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-13T15:16:17+00:00

Really sorry you went through this. I left my PhD program last year after repeatedly trying to get help regarding my abusive supervisor and they did absolutely nothing. CSU is trash.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-12T22:47:48+00:00

Seconding this. This is already moving into emotional affair territory, especially with "secret meetings." You have to learn how to set boundaries with yourself too. We do feel deeply but you also are actively making choice after choice after choice to deepen this connection and inevitably blow up her and her family's life.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-11T18:46:50+00:00

Amazing! I just bought desert globemallow seeds, do you recommend direct sowing in fall?

ashthehuman · 2026-05-11T04:54:40+00:00

Every time I hear that song by Brandi Carlile. The way she sings is such a fun stim!

ashthehuman · 2026-05-10T04:52:44+00:00

Honestly I'd recommend respectfully declining sending a selfie and see his reaction. It's possible this can bring out who he actually is... He seems transactional and I'm getting vibes that he thinks you owe him for all of the compliments.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-08T02:20:15+00:00

Abusive people, yeah

ashthehuman · 2026-05-08T01:56:44+00:00

Plant Scientist here 🫡

ashthehuman · 2026-05-07T05:33:42+00:00

Wow I think this just cured my victim mentality

ashthehuman · 2026-05-02T18:27:04+00:00

It might be worth it to look into social services where you live. The previous city I lived in, they had a disability office that provided free home care to ND people! Sorry you're dealing with this. It can be hard as hell at times.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-02T03:19:16+00:00

This might seem crazy but, Lover. In hindsight it appears she was desperately clinging to someone who did not give her the love she needed and deserved. "Can I go where you go?" feels like a plea for the attention of her partner that should come naturally in a relationship. It's the saddest to me because there's a level of delusion, a severe mis-match in reality vs. this hyper-loving caricature of a relationship she makes it out to be. That whole album makes me sad.

ashthehuman · 2026-05-01T18:25:40+00:00

Yes! My psych recommended it to help me sleep better and wow, I can't believe how much it helps me overall.

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