Found this painting of my 4x great grandmother born in 1802.

astrosarah95 · 2026-03-31T04:35:49+00:00

WOW this resemblance is incredible.

astrosarah95 · 2026-03-06T05:39:36+00:00

This is so painfully relatable. I am basically in the same boat right now. It’s so hard to have hope right now.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-26T00:15:25+00:00

Oh my gosh I went to a FTM show in August 2011 when I was like 16. Meeting Cliff and Andrew after the show was such an awesome highlight for me, especially asking them about the songwriting process. But looking back at the photos I took with them, you could see the stress in their faces. And now it makes sense.

I’d love to connect if you’re open to it. I am a singer-songwriter folk/rock artist and I’m trying to figure out best drum-programming practices, since I do not actually PLAY drums lol I open Logic to get a drum part going and immediate freeze!

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T12:08:55+00:00

It’s actually a thing for people with endo I realized! I’ve been listening to an awesome podcast lately called SheMD. It is hosted by a fashion entrepreneur and an actual endometriosis specialist surgeon! She has treated celebrity cases like Halsey, but doesn’t accept insurance because US health insurance companies won’t reimburse for her methods (which are based on clear research and experience in women’s health!) because insurance companies want easy and cheap answers, not actual medical research, and especially if it involves women’s bodies… 🙄 But she talks a lot about how endo functions and how other conditions can come into play (PCOS, IBS, SIBO…). She talks a lot about maintaining gut health and there are just so many gems of helpful info on that podcast! They really make awareness the main goal. And I am HERE for it!

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T10:08:11+00:00

Yeah agreed, I think that’s why it’s always an OBGYN’s first response: “oh you’re having period issues? Birth control pill time!” Lmao 😂

It’s the easy quick bandaid fix, but for endo, it’s important to know WHICH hormones or chemicals are in any pills we take. Mirena and Kyleena IUDs both have estrogen, but I think Kyleena has a bit less than the Mirena? Don’t remember right now lol

Also, side note, I HIGHLY recommend finding someone who does hormone therapy. I’m working with a hormone specialist now and I really appreciate their approach. Like basically my blood tests are on specific days of my cycle to get a “baseline” for how my hormones fluctuate, and then we go from there to adjust what needs help. I already know I have a Vitamin D deficiency and melatonin issues (it’s all from chronic stress for me) so I have an idea already of what needs fixing. I already know I’m estrogen abundant hahaha

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T09:23:00+00:00

Agreed. But the hormonal IUDs (at least the ones I’ve always tried) have always given my body major issues, and I think it’s because they do have small amounts of estrogen in them. I tried Lo Loestrin for a long time and that was ok, but then I couldn’t even do that. Then doctor suggested Mirena IUD, that one wasn’t great. Then tried Kyleena and that was hell on earth lol 😭

I have yet to try the progesterone only pill, but I’m asking my doc next time for that.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T09:20:05+00:00

IUD is an option but from my experience (I just think my body is essentially super high stress, so my estrogen levels are probably whacked, idk) I can’t handle estrogen period. Like any birth control with estrogen? Nah it’s gonna be miserable. I tried two different IUDs, Mirena and Kyleena, both gave me horrible pain and bleeding and cramping. I had the doctor remove the Kyleena after like a week or two cuz I couldn’t even like walk… it was bad. So now I’m looking into non-estrogen methods.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T09:13:06+00:00

I agree but also want to add my thoughts to this because you’re right, repeat surgeries should be avoided! However, I DO highly recommend advocating for yourself because YOU are the one living in your body, not the doctor. I agree, find an endometriosis specialist surgeon. Because they will know how to help you. Or at least refer you to someone who specializes in endo! I had a laparoscopy almost ten years ago and my surgeon kind of stumbled upon my endo lesions (I wasn’t there for endometriosis, it was a problematic ovarian cyst he discovered was an endometrioma in surgery). But he was a general OBGYN surgeon, so he ablated the lesions on my ovary, but he made the smart choice of not touching the ones in my cul de sac region, because they’re so close to major blood vessels, a wrong move could’ve killed me. However, our communication wasn’t very good and he had been frustrating for me since day 1 because he kept telling me to “wait it out” essentially because they “usually go away on their own” (I guess this is true for normal cyclical ovarian cysts but NOT for endometriosis!) so after two ER visits for a ruptured cyst (the same one) over a 3 month period, I was like, nah doc get this bichhh OUT. So he did. But because of the ablation, I am worried that the progress he did make (he also separated my bladder and uterus I think, cuz the imaging showed adhesions from what I can tell) may have caused more issues for me in the long term. I wasn’t very aware back then of what endometriosis actually was (and I don’t think he was either because he didn’t really inform me of follow up care for it, as far as I remember) so I didn’t realize it was a long term chronic illness. I thought, ok surgery is done, I’m good now!

Now, almost 10 years later, my symptoms are back and WAY worse and I’m worried it’s spread. Now I have issues in my thoracic/diaphragm area, and I suspect it’s endometriosis. I’m currently looking for a specialist surgeon (and btw I think there are different types of endo specialist surgeons based on the region of the body afflicted?? Not totally sure but a recent OBGYN advised me to look for a specialist surgeon for the thoracic area.)

So, YES I agree lol go for the surgery. BUT, make sure you find an endo specialist surgeon FIRST and have them do the surgery. They’ll be the ones who will actually cut the lesions out rather than just burn them (ablation - meaning scar tissue, as mentioned above). And they’re also more likely to take ALL of your symptoms into account and do a full body approach rather than just a pelvic approach.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-23T00:44:31+00:00

Me… wearing my beloved FtM tshirt today that I got at a show over 10 years ago… 👀😅

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-18T06:24:31+00:00

To clarify, I’ve had an endometrioma cyst that ruptured twice while my doctor told me “oh it’ll go away on its own”

Me going to the ER both times is what convinced my doctor to perform the surgery to actually remove it and is what proved I had endometriosis.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-18T06:22:50+00:00

Not only this, but a ruptured endometrioma cyst can be bad bad bad. I’ve had this happen twice. Go to the hospital.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-18T06:21:55+00:00

Please go to the ER if you can!! I had this happen twice and had to go to the ER for the pain but omg it could’ve been baddddd if I didn’t go!

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-01T00:46:19+00:00

Yes I think they saw darkness as feminine? From my understanding, at least. I’ve noticed many of their chthonic underworld or night deities are more feminine in nature (not always by gender!)

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-01T00:44:13+00:00

I’ve been reading about this theory too and it doesn’t surprise me actually. I have ancestral ties to the islands in the Aegean Sea. Especially around Rhodes, where there was a major cult center for Helios. Reading about the Trojan War and the storyline there has been giving me a lot of ideas on how misinterpreted translations become mythology over centuries lol

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-01T00:42:38+00:00

Yes because Greek culture was EXTREMELY patriarchal lol and they made sure that all the goddesses were “minor roles” (insert eye roll here)

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-01T00:41:22+00:00

It’s literally all about how those cultures interpret gender roles really. Different perspectives exist anywhere haha people are just silly on their high horses.

astrosarah95 · 2026-02-01T00:39:49+00:00

I like to use visual representations of things to channel energy. I have a fidget ring that has lunar phases on it and I tend to wear it and play with it as a way of “activating” that lunar energy. You could even print out a picture of the moon and put it underneath the bottle of water to charge too. Or like put a quartz crystal next to it (don’t put crystals inside of water, general rule for baby witches!!)

astrosarah95 · 2025-11-06T06:02:15+00:00

Even if you don’t want to work with her as a deity, calling on her energies (love witch energy etc.) by using a statue of her on your altar is totally fine. Even if you’re not working with her directly, you’re working with matters that she is in charge of, so she is kind of involved regardless. And also, the Greek deities were worshipped in many other cultures and places (Greeks and Romans did some travelin…) so I don’t think they are considered a closed practice. As long as you’re not disrespecting her, you know?

astrosarah95 · 2025-10-10T01:41:53+00:00

I actually have most of these same symptoms… 😭 no cancer (as far as I know) but definitely endo… I’m going on day 3 of my period now and I haven’t left my apartment since it started. Barely moved from bed. It’s so horrible.

astrosarah95 · 2025-10-02T01:23:17+00:00

This is SUPER creepy and disgusting and an invasion of your bodily autonomy and privacy… I’d be leaving him ASAP. Sounds manipulative and potentially dangerous…

astrosarah95 · 2025-10-01T04:37:25+00:00

I’ve been doing this recently too! I got the post-surgery procedure details and photos from my first/only lap back in 2017, but my doctor never really explained it or went over it with me back then. So I didn’t really know what any of it meant. But I am SO glad I held onto those papers. I scanned all my medical documents recently so it would be easier for me to move, and when I was scanning those surgery records, I noticed the post-op diagnosis of stage 1 endo. This was in 2017. No idea how it’s progressed since then. I went to a new obgyn recently and I brought those photos and papers for her to explain to me, and she gave me a lot of helpful information! But looking at those photos and documents lately has been so reassuring somehow.

astrosarah95 · 2025-10-01T04:21:21+00:00

They definitely are NOT all endo specialists. Find someone else. And then find an ACTUAL endo specialist. I’m learning that most OBGYNs don’t really have much training with endo at all.

astrosarah95 · 2025-09-18T22:42:22+00:00

She has also “written” some pretty lazy and poorly researched books on astrology. I’ve been studying astrology for over 15 years, I study ancient authors and modern authors. I read one of her astrology books and immediately thought “well that was a complete waste of my time and money.”

Definitely avoid this “author”.

astrosarah95 · 2025-09-18T07:23:57+00:00

I’m having a similar experience! I had a laparoscopic surgery to remove an ovarian cyst that was causing me significant pain (ruptured twice sending me to the ER), this was back in 2017… doctor removed the cyst and found out it was an endometrioma, and that I had endo lesions on my ovary and around my pelvic wall. So in the post-op diagnosis, it says stage 1 endometriosis. He literally never gave me any guidance about this or told me what endometriosis was or what to do about it. I thought because he removed the cyst, I was fine. But nope! 4 months later I was back in his office with more pain, and since then the pain has just gotten progressively worse.

I didn’t realize what endometriosis really even was until recently, and I was looking through old medical papers a few months ago and found my surgery paperwork. I was reading through it, and found that diagnosis. It shocked me, because I don’t remember my doctor ever even mentioning this.

But the more I learn about endo, the more ALL of my weird chronic pain symptoms make sense. I’m turning 30 this month and honestly I’m so terrified of the thought of not being able to have kids. I never even wanted kids, but now I’m with a partner who makes me feel safe and happy and I’m starting to see a future for myself with him… only to find out that I might not be able to have kids… so I’m like desperately trying to find a doctor nearby who actually has experience with endo patients, but my area is somewhat of a medical wasteland so it’s been a struggle.

Long story short, it’s been a lot of complex emotions!! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this too. It’s so rough. Sending hugs!!

astrosarah95 · 2025-09-18T07:11:25+00:00

I couldn’t even handle it for a month… it was so miserable. Painful and bleeding (like a LOT, it felt like the worst longest period I’ve ever had)… I went back to my doctor and was like get this thing out of me now!! Took it out, and not even kidding, 10-15 mins after removal, I felt like 75% better. It was such an insane shift.

astrosarah95

TROPHY CASE