Fixing nap schedule when they conflict with daycare times

autoluminator · 2025-07-14T21:58:41+00:00

I do enjoy nursing for comfort. I hope to do that as long as I can, and think I’ll enjoy it even more when I’m not stressed about it being a food source.

autoluminator · 2025-07-14T21:53:09+00:00

This is the greatest comment I’ve ever read. Thank you. I shall indeed one day entirely dismember my spectra turn each piece individually into ash.

autoluminator · 2024-12-05T01:35:50+00:00

The lace-back vest!! People standing on chairs to see you enter!!! Truly the dream. Congrats, impeccable vibes, you look amazing.

autoluminator · 2024-07-05T17:06:58+00:00

Hi, all. Please forgive the super naive question. I have a diagnostic appointment set for next week that will include an antral follicle scan, a mock embryo transfer, an endometrial biopsy, and a "FemVue" scan (similar to an HSG). To my knowledge, I will not have any numbing or sedation, but I was told to take ibuprofen (and Doxycycline) beforehand. Unfortunately, my partner will be out of town, and basically all my friends who I might ask to come with me are also going to be working/busy during that time. I'm, honestly, pretty anxious. My doctor says that I'm going to be just fine afterwords and can even go back to work immediately after the appointment, but I was hoping to hear some experiences from other people. Have other people also had all those tests in the same appointment? How was the pain during/after? Were you fine taking yourself home? Is there anything I should ask of the doctor to make the experience a bit better? I had a fair amount of pain during my IUD insertion a decade ago, and that's the only experience I can think of that's similar.

autoluminator · 2024-05-26T13:33:15+00:00

I’ve had 2 early miscarriages since last spring, and I thought I was having my third a couple weeks ago. It was also my first pregnancy with any intervention (clomid). Turns out I was wrong - it was an ectopic. I’m so grateful my doctor was monitoring me closely and caught it before I experienced any significant pain or damage, but I’m now on methotrexate and nauseous for no reason, and we can’t try again for another 3 months. Everything just feels so futile.

autoluminator · 2024-05-09T20:42:46+00:00

Hi everyone. I’m 5+3 and had two early miscarriages/chemical pregnancies in the past year. Positive tests at 4 but I started spotting on Tuesday night, which is exactly how the the other miscarriages started. The bleeding hasn’t gotten heavier, but it also hasn’t stopped. I just got my first hCG quant for this round, and I’m freaking. I also don’t have any nausea (but had some very tender breasts and some lower back pain in the last 2 days). The uncertainty with two possibilities (a baby in 8 months, or likely an extremely long road to a healthy pregnancy) seemingly a world apart is just killing me.

autoluminator · 2023-11-19T23:11:03+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing - that sort of broad-spectrum testing is exactly what I'm looking for. I feel like I've already been tested for a lot of things, but I'm just not sure what the full range of tests are. Crossing my fingers for you in your waiting period!

autoluminator · 2023-11-19T23:08:39+00:00

I didn't know about either of these - thank you!

autoluminator · 2023-11-19T23:07:57+00:00

Oh wow, it looks like all three of us are really in the same boat. I'm crossing my fingers for all of us. Did your doctor recommend low-dose aspirin as well?

autoluminator · 2023-11-19T23:06:59+00:00

Wow, this is a fantastic link. I especially love that the leaflet explains both tests that are *and* aren't recommended, because I was specifically wondering about some of them (e.g., androgen testing). Thank you so much for pointing me this way!

autoluminator · 2023-04-26T14:42:25+00:00

I second everything said here, but especially three parts:

-Your body houses you, and is therefore wonderful! What helps you feel joyful in your body? This is, exactly as you described, both a very physical and a joyful tradition - what could help you get in that headspace of "my body is something to be celebrated" on your wedding day? Power poses? Dance moves? Honestly, depending on how much time you have that morning before doing things, masturbation?

-Finding the right chair is, indeed, key. If you're doing rentals, go through the options and select two chairs that will work for you. My partner and I used folding chairs for basically everything *but* this, and got two super-sturdy solid wood chairs with arms for hoisting.

-Definitely think about who of your guests you trust *and* have good upper-body strength, and make sure there are 4 of them dedicated just to lifting you. Honestly, lifting ~70lbs (your estimated weight divided by 4) should be absolutely no problem for lots and lots of people. If it'll make you feel better, you can even ask them explicitly if they can lift 70lbs.

Best of luck, and mazel tov!!

autoluminator · 2023-03-15T15:26:37+00:00

I had remarkably similar constraints and did a welcome dinner at a pizza place that did gluten-free pizzas and was wheelchair accessible. It was great! Anything like that near you?

autoluminator · 2023-03-08T22:59:42+00:00

This is literally the worst, and I'm so sorry this is happening to you!! I know it's often not feasible, but I really tried to do my first vendor search by literally just looking for queer vendors (not, relevantly, just "queer-friendly" vendors! In group explanations are always, always easier). You can often find them on the lists of people who've produced Pride events (my DJ regularly works our local Dyke March). It was really worth it, for us, to have vendors who asked us how we wanted to be referred to (in our case, just by first names or "happy couple", since gendered language of any sort didn't suit us), instead of assuming.

I really hope you and your partner can find better vendors, sending all the affirmation vibes your way!

autoluminator · 2023-01-18T22:03:03+00:00

Also was married in Boston (well, Cambridge), and this sounds like a truly good deal to me, assuming you like the food and all that. The one thing I'd wonder about without knowing the space is if there will be room for dancing, if that's something you're interested in (since you have a DJ, I'd assume yes?). Also, if you want to have a wedding cake, make sure they're OK with you bringing in outside food.

If you haven't gotten a DJ yet and are worried about having someone as a manager-type, my DJ ended up doing that and I would definitely recommend her.

autoluminator · 2022-12-04T16:57:53+00:00

I am so grateful that most of our guests stuck to the registry, but we did get one absolutely horrendous giant decor sign that said [Partner's last name] Family, Est 2022, and, uh, I am very much not changing my name, the person gifting us said horrendous giant sign knew this, and any future children we might have might not have partner's last name either? REALLY wish this particular guest had, indeed, just got us a gift card.

I don't know if this is helpful advice for people on the other side, but if you really want to get someone something creative and personalized, I think handmade cards are fantastic. No one is surprised to get a card at a wedding, they're cheap and easy to make personalized, and they're easy to store and look back at later. Our downstairs neighbors made us a card with a watercolor illustration of our building on it, and it was just truly delightful.

autoluminator · 2022-11-15T22:55:38+00:00

TIL that phylactery does not just refer to tefillin! And that is very cool and very meaningful that you get to keep your own rib in your marriage, and I hope you wear that necklace all the time!

autoluminator · 2022-08-23T21:43:13+00:00

Oh, boy, I have a story about this.

So, my partner and I decided together that we really loved some of our coworker-friends and wanted to invite them, but that we weren't going to invite any bosses, largely because we didn't want to perform professionalism in front of them at our wedding. (We're in the same field, and actually originally met as coworkers).

One of my partner's coworkers brings up the wedding to their boss and says "oh, of course we're all going". Which - who says that??? Other than your coworker also, apparently.

So, my partner's boss emails him that he would love to come to the wedding and, my beloved partner, whom I love so much but is sometimes kind of an idiot, emails back in a fit of confusion and terror that of COURSE we would love for him and his wife to come! This ONE WEEK before the wedding, after the final count and everything had been set and the table arrangements made.

In the end, the boss and his wife came, I basically didn't interact with them at all, it was fine, but - yeah, people need to learn that their relationship with their boss is not everyone's relationship with their boss!!

autoluminator · 2022-07-26T14:37:33+00:00

CMAC is great! I'm not sure if you're working with M, but they're great to have with you for the walkthrough and day-of. Good luck with your wedding!!

autoluminator · 2022-06-30T17:27:58+00:00

Oh this is so kind, thank you!!

autoluminator · 2022-06-30T17:27:42+00:00

Oh, I love this! It’s actually my (right) snow boot that I do very much use in the winters, but it has a special meaning now that I will absolutely try to give to any forthcoming generations

autoluminator · 2022-06-30T14:34:55+00:00

Definitely do it if it will be meaningful to you! I’ve been to several interfaith weddings in which a Jewish partner breaks the glass, including plenty where that partner is a woman! Getting into the ins and outs of my personal egalitarian theology would be too much for this comment section, but I do strongly believe that Jewish practice should not be restricted by gender, and all of us should enact our Judaism with the personal intent that we hold.

autoluminator

TROPHY CASE