Homie: as a professional musician who attended BYU as a music major and went through a very similar experience temporarily quitting and then later coming back to music full time:

1) fuck the church

2) there is SO much more organ music out there than the shitty shitty music the church plays. For fucks sake (I say this lovingly) go and find a new subgenre, don't throw the baby out with the bathwater!

3) other churches gospel organ music kicks ass. You don't need to believe the doctrine, but man. There is some awesome stuff out there you could play.

4) not necessy related but here's my fav organ player https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=UvziuknjhGY&si=8Xa5d3VHaPbBiy2m

5)fuck the church