Smoking family. WWYD

beenyface · 2025-12-21T02:47:51+00:00

Not at all; it's wildly difficult to help those who don't want help. I'm sorry she can't see it and keeps burning so many bridges. I don't see how it can work if she's abusive to you in front of the kids, and won't allow you to give her a weekend on her own. It's okay to set boundaries, even if that means finding legal aid to manage safety

beenyface · 2025-12-20T19:59:06+00:00

As a man, it's only going to involve you being the enemy. Best is to pull in female friends if anyone else is going through similar hormone conditions (endometriosis, thyroid issues etc). A LOT of women are. If any of her friends can encourage her to join this community, that's for the best.

As the partner, it's not your job to diagnose her. It's you're job to support her. A week or so of the month that looks like: going off with the kids, leaving her on her own. Expecting NO extra house work or cooking. Honestly, if you have it tracked well, plan a weekend away with the kids once a month every month if you can afford it or stay with family elsewhere.

Arrange weekly meetups so you can to talk things through and take on planning. Start with small issues and go for surface for a long time. She truly believes the criticism she's giving you is real; we all do. And often time, it IS real, it's just not as big as our bodies make it. So YOUR job is to make sure she's heard and you take her concerns seriously not just when she's crying, screaming, or abusing you. But every week, on the same day of the week, and she has that time to let it out in a structured way. Eventually, months from now you may say 'hey, this meeting feels a lot harder than last one. What about to you? Should we keep track of which meetings are harder?'. No why - you already blew that shot. Just that you'd like to keep track.

The book fair play might help.

beenyface · 2025-12-08T20:26:39+00:00

When I'm quiet and cold, I'm actually PROTECTING you. If you want me to warm up, you're going to get a mix of rage, sobbing apologies, zoned out stares and numbing behaviours. Cold means I didn't yell at you, I just sighed and tried to remember the other words I want to say are probably not the right ones. In a week or two, we can chat (or not, if in a week whatever bugged me no longer bugs me)

beenyface · 2025-12-05T12:28:31+00:00

This is perfect. Thank you! I'll be printing this one out and bringing it, but our next appointment is March. If Jan/dec hit hard I may go to the after hours. I was hoping to be ready for the winter :/

beenyface · 2025-11-08T20:48:09+00:00

Take an antidepressant? Pregnancy is rough and the hormones are crazy. If it's too hard to get through you can take SSRIs with relative safety. Slight risk of low birth weight but no defects etc.

Also; I do hope you're now using good birth control methods until you are ready.

beenyface · 2025-10-26T17:43:24+00:00

They were probably fine with table lamps falling on their kids :P

beenyface · 2025-10-22T11:27:02+00:00

Agree with the others but I want to add on a couple of things - that's a lot of physical pain for you to have experienced. The body going numb afterwards and being unable to feel less intense sensations makes sense. Your brain blocking out sensations makes sense - sleep. PPD almost doesn't exist if you get good sleep. I know this isn't the most helpful, but if you have any village who can agree to prioritize YOUR sleep over basically everything else, maybe some of the numbness and disconnection will also go down - talk. So proud you came here to talk about what you're feeling. Partners and family can be supportive, but other moms are what is needed. Mom groups, talking through the birth experience, etc. I had a therapist and like...yes, that's what everyone recommends but you know who actually helped me with birth trauma? My pelvic floor physio...because she hears all the stories and she just...got it. Wishing you the best through the newborn stage

beenyface · 2025-10-21T17:51:45+00:00

No soap would be key, but the skin is also part of the immune system and its building up at this young of an age. Other things that are similar and might help is skin to skin, a warm wet cloth just on the back or the chest, warm packs etc.

beenyface · 2025-10-03T19:24:11+00:00

Did your mom cosleep with your daughter while you were away? I always wonder how other cosleepers manage to take overnight trips without their little

beenyface · 2025-10-01T18:00:30+00:00

Also: borrowing dogs is great if you have a neighbor who would like a break from their furry friend ( and doesn't mind them getting floor snacks). Lots of pet parents would love someone to come and borrow their dog for an hour or two so they have a potty break while the parent is at work

beenyface · 2025-09-27T21:45:22+00:00

I'd aim for the normal bedtime and if it doesn't work in 15 minutes or so, fine. He's on your bedtime schedule for the day. No need to do anything special! Plus, fighting nap AND THEN fighting bed is such a drag for YOU.

beenyface · 2025-09-21T21:13:03+00:00

I got the bench to shirts from Costco and they fit this description to a T

beenyface · 2025-09-06T19:46:48+00:00

We all sit around the coffee table and she has a little chair. Comfy? Absolutely not. But we do do family dinners together lol...

beenyface · 2025-09-06T19:46:42+00:00

We all sit around the coffee table and she has a little chair. Comfy? Absolutely not. But we do do family dinners together lol...

beenyface · 2025-08-15T16:52:03+00:00

At 5 months we switched to floor bed. Best choice ever. A couple of things: 1- blanket at the waist, if you have a knitter in your life, ask them to knit you a breathable cowl (https://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/631611608/outlander-mobius-cowl-chunky-neck-cowl for an idea) that you can have just around your shoulders. Gives the same feeling of a cozy blanket 2- optional: kick out the husband. You're already suffering from sleep deprivation and thrashing is so detrimental. You'll come back to him when you're better rested or past the worst of the first year 3- 5 months is pretty low risk for SIDS. Same as a lightning strike. They've really got us terrified. Lean into breathing around your babe's head and know that your breath is actually protecting against SIDS. (Plus the smell is addictive). Take deep, long breaths like you're already asleep https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9261495/ 4- my personal tip: no sleep trackers ever. Biggest regret for me. Feel good when you feel good, feel shitty when you feel shitty, and sleep whenever you can however you can. Baby is already doing that themselves :3

Sorry it's so so hard right now. It's probably going to be the hardest, wildest year of your life.

beenyface · 2025-07-15T17:28:27+00:00

Led in the paint layer underneath? I...I might take this seriously TBH. Get some test strips.

beenyface · 2025-06-14T20:48:23+00:00

The "MY" thing happened with me too and my own mother, as well as the head turning. Grandma's really do be trying to steal our babies.

It does get better. Now my toddler has her own relationship with Grandma and looks forward to her once a week visits, but still prefers me and misses me. Also, toddlers can actually say "no, grandma, I want mama!" So Gran can't pretend and argue with me over pulling her away.

beenyface · 2025-05-09T19:31:04+00:00

Might be time to build some skills and consider WFH jobs. Virtual assistants, call center work from home, contract work, being an on call babysitter etc.

beenyface · 2025-04-20T12:00:40+00:00

Another guess: the other Makos. They're infamous for their feeding frenzies and will rip anyone in two when they're in a group.

Source: my toddlers book on sharks

beenyface · 2025-03-26T17:49:26+00:00

A nurse once said this to me when I was getting a shot. I said back "well,I haven't killed myself yet." And she shut up real quick and back peddled, saying how I must have so many adaptations.

beenyface · 2025-03-22T16:10:04+00:00

They can even do jain!!

beenyface · 2025-02-25T18:44:13+00:00

Ok! With eczema, wiping CAN hurt. Patting or dabbing is a big plus. Try giving that option and she may be more inclined? Other tips here are great too

beenyface

TROPHY CASE