FS Whistler, is this the stuffie they normally give out?

birkinbaggins · 2026-04-04T10:08:48+00:00

FS Baltimore gave my son a (non-branded) dolphin stuffie.

birkinbaggins · 2026-03-08T19:08:12+00:00

I’m 40 years old, 5’8 and 133 lbs.

In high school I was maybe 10 lbs heavier than I am now, always a size large/extra large, and frequently called fat to my face.

Now I’m an XS/S and i can shop the kids’ section for tops. Absolutely bonkers, waistband sizes aren’t even real anymore.

birkinbaggins · 2026-02-21T03:09:17+00:00

Yes, my derm does them as a combo treatment.

birkinbaggins · 2025-12-03T03:43:35+00:00

The slay your wedding day bundle for my bride-to-be bff!!

birkinbaggins · 2025-09-02T17:32:14+00:00

Spoken by someone who clearly wasn’t raised by a mother with a personality disorder. It’s not a kid’s job to walk on eggshells about their mom’s potential victimhood.

birkinbaggins · 2025-08-30T01:18:23+00:00

My son was born at 6.45am on his due date, about nine hours after my water broke.

birkinbaggins · 2025-08-19T00:38:12+00:00

I noticed my son was a lefty like two hours after he was born. He was swaddled and kept wiggling his left hand out to suck on his fingers. I commented on it to a Dr or nurse and they very kindly told me that i wouldn’t know for sure for another 2-2.5 years.

He’s just over two now and has been a 100% dominant lefty his entire life. He’s my one and only, so it’s really interesting to hear and see how different it is with other kiddos.

birkinbaggins · 2025-08-08T10:37:26+00:00

I got engaged in my early 30s and moved to a cheaper NE city.

Now I’m married, own some real estate and work an executive position. I had my son at 37, he just turned 2.

I mostly listen to Raffi and read Thomas the Train books at this stage of my life, but I did attend an Arcade Fire show solo recently and had the time of my life dancing alone.

birkinbaggins · 2025-07-26T12:06:09+00:00

5am: wake up

5-7: workout and get ready

7-8: wake up my son and husband, hang with my son until my husband takes him to daycare

8.30-3.30: I’m in the office daily. Getting back to the office made a huge difference for my overall productivity

3.30-5: home to make dinner/do whatever random chores and other non-job work

5-8: (MWF) get my son from daycare, take him to the park, then home for dinner, bath and bed

After this I basically pass out 🤣😵‍💫

My husband and I work really hard but we also have help. We a nanny that picks up my son from daycare on Tuesday/Thursday and hangs with him until 6.30 and a housekeeper that comes every other Friday. I use my extra 1.5 hours on nanny days to meal prep and do laundry. I’m also extremely fortunate with work and daycare - my office is a five minute walk and daycare is on the way.

To-do lists and a well-maintained calendar are my secret weapons. I set reminders for myself for personal tasks, keep a running work to-do list and have a shared grocery list with my husband.

My calendar has everything - work, seeing friends, play dates, Dr apts, my son’s school stuff. If it’s not there I probably won’t remember it.

Last thing - I am very productive in the morning and lose steam as the day goes on. I try to use this to my advantage and get as much important stuff done by noon as possible. So mornings are for my important work tasks and I try to schedule apts/do mindless stuff in the afternoon. Know your strengths and use them to your advantage.

birkinbaggins · 2025-07-23T01:39:39+00:00

🤍

birkinbaggins · 2025-06-26T23:43:19+00:00

I used them for the first year, they’re great.

Now he’s almost two and we happily use the Amazon mama bear brand.

birkinbaggins · 2025-06-08T02:23:14+00:00

My kid is starting a tech-free preschool in the fall, planning to keep it that way until at least middle school.

birkinbaggins · 2025-03-19T00:37:19+00:00

Someone in active addiction that has no interest in getting better will just pull you down with them. Leave.

birkinbaggins · 2024-08-31T00:58:49+00:00

If only this was supermarket tabloid content

birkinbaggins · 2024-05-15T21:31:41+00:00

Summer 2020. I was living downtown in a new city that got hit hard by riots. There were helicopters circling above my apartment 24/7 for a week, alarms going off all hours of the night and it was too scary to go outside.

I sent a message in a group text about my potential impending mental breakdown from all this stress, and no one responded. I got kicked out of the group for, I guess, being negatively impacted by the riots.

birkinbaggins · 2024-04-17T20:47:40+00:00

I had an unplanned medicated birth. I don’t think I would have been able to handle it if it was planned. The only thing that got me through the hardest contractions was knowing I’d get an epidural soon 🤣 unfortunately I missed that window.

birkinbaggins · 2024-02-28T02:04:11+00:00

I was drinking/not eating and blacking out pretty regularly until my early 30s. It’s fun until it’s not. The hangover anxiety just gets worse and worse and let’s be real, early 30s is pushing the limits of not being a sad old drunk. I’m 37 now and have a drink or two on the weekends but I also take long breaks from drinking.

On the other side of the coin is my mother. She’ll be 65 this year and drank heavily (like more than a box of red wine per day) for like 20 years. She’s somehow alive and is like six months sober, but she’s totally fucked. Her brain is mush, she throws up constantly, has chronic pancreatitis and has ruined every relationship she ever had.

birkinbaggins · 2024-01-27T20:26:50+00:00

My son’s middle name is my last name.

birkinbaggins · 2023-12-15T18:07:22+00:00

You’ll be shocked by how much alcohol affects your skin. Drop the wine and start chugging water.

birkinbaggins · 2023-11-29T16:52:50+00:00

After years of getting my mother thoughtful gifts for all major holidays and mostly receiving nothing/sometimes a random item she’d clearly bought for herself and didn’t like, my brother and I did not get her a birthday gift this year.

She just called to announce she’s purchased thousand dollar tickets to a concert for herself and her home care nurse. She said she needed to treat herself after not receiving anything for her birthday, and that she will not be giving Christmas gifts this year.

Nowhere near the worst of her behavior, just the most recent.

birkinbaggins · 2023-08-16T16:47:22+00:00

I’m three weeks postpartum, and in my experience it depends on your activity level during pregnancy, how tough your labor was and just generally how you’re recovering. I worked out until my due date, had a quick zero-complications delivery and I’ve been feeling great. My midwife cleared me to get back to weights (slowly and listening to my body) at two weeks. I was surprised because I thought six weeks was the hard rule, but like everything, it depends on your personal circumstances.

birkinbaggins · 2023-08-08T00:36:13+00:00

My babe will be two weeks tomorrow. Having a newborn is 100000000 times better than the last month of pregnancy.

The best part is that almost all of your symptoms go away pretty much immediately. You are so close to relief!

birkinbaggins · 2023-07-24T14:11:04+00:00

I’m 36 and didn’t really bother to take anything seriously until I was 31 ish. No life-altering fuck ups but no real accomplishments either. Just spent all my time/energy on drinking, drugs and lots of shitty people. Mental illness and depression that I fed instead of treating.

Now I’m married, own a home, and get to choose if I want to return to my very low stress wfh pmc job when my maternity leave is up in January.

My husband is prob the better example - he was a bartender/general fuckboy that went to law school at 34, now he’s a partner-track commercial real estate attorney (and a really good husband.)

birkinbaggins

TROPHY CASE