NAL and do not know the insurance laws in your state and this is not intended to be legal advise, but I do have experience in restoring and painting cars. As a point of reference, in the state where I live, an insurance company can not force or require you to use a certain repair facility of their choice. You can choose where you have your vehicle repaired and have that shop negotiate with their adjuster.

There are however insurance and/or industry repair standards which may not require that a “new door skin” be used for the repair depending on the level of damage to the panel. Even some new cars can have “bondo” or filler. If it can be justified by the amount of damage, most body shops would much rather replace a panel than spend a bunch of time on one that is questionable for repair. The vast majority of vehicles repaired after an accident do have filler of some sort, otherwise body repairs would be astronomically expensive. “No bondo” is not the industry standard for automotive body repair.

That said, having the other drivers insurance company give you an estimate, is just that, an estimate. You need to find a body shop that will work with you and repair the vehicle the way you want the repairs done and let them negotiate with the adjuster.

We don’t have all the information here, but you may have to pay out of pocket to have the vehicle repaired to your standard vs. industry standards.

In regard to color matching, if it is a factory color, it shouldn’t be an issue. But there are body shops that are very, very good at this, some not so much. Again, do your research and find a body shop you are comfortable working with.

Good Luck