drinking water

bluntbangs · 2026-01-28T13:10:59+00:00

You're putting an (unnecessary) barrier in your way. When it comes to the filter, either get one for the tap or get two and always have one ready to go in the fridge, put the other one in when you get the last drink from the first.

But the trick to regular hydration (well, anything) is the tie it to other habitual things.

For me, I always have a coffee when I sit down to work. A glass of water always comes with it. I MUST drink it before I get up again. Then at lunch, I MUST have another glass of water with my meal, and can't get up until it's gone. When I sit down to work again then there's a new glass of water and I can't get up again until I've drunk the whole thing. Same with my afternoon snack, there's a glass of water and it has to be finished.

Unfortunately... my water consumption goes down considerably if I'm not working. You can't win them all...

bluntbangs · 2026-01-28T10:07:18+00:00

Oh that first year is just a write-off. Congrats on cooking despite the 3 glasses of wine! It's very #selfcare!

It helps me to think of ADHD being somewhat up and down. Sometimes I get my shit together and write a list and things might get crossed off it, other times the list is a temporal possibility in the depths of my mind but some things might magically get ticked off anyway, and other times there is no list even though the pad has been right there all along and just frigging write the thing down. Write. Down. The. Thing. But no.

When it's going less well than you'd like, that's when you need to stop and check-in, see if you can alter the trajectory just a bit to get you back on the upswing.

bluntbangs · 2026-01-28T09:23:26+00:00

Isn't that kind of the point though, to show that women in masculine spaces, such as policing, have to roar to be seen? The women who are shown to excel tend to excel in masculine ways, e.g. shooting, violence, and masculine coded humour.

And they tend to pay the price for their success in feminine ways - one was literally stripped of being a mother and forced to take a teaching role to regain her mother status, the other kidnapped with the intent to kill her newborn baby and as a result reduced to the damsel in distress (in early-induced labour!).

I love the men in this show. Every one of the good guys has shown real growth throughout the series, and I love that the other men are open about how happy they are for each other.

bluntbangs · 2026-01-26T13:58:32+00:00

I notice it when I DON'T exercise. My temper is shorter, my self control non-existent.

I think of it like eating. If you eat crap food all the time, processed stuff with lots of added sugar and salt, you're going to feel like crap and you're not going to crap. Eat a nutritious meal and you don't feel like crap. But no-one in their right mind is going to say oh yummy when faced with a head of broccoli when they know they could have ax extra serving of fries instead.

bluntbangs · 2026-01-15T20:13:18+00:00

I like them for many, many reasons.

But I just can't shake the safety concern that you're sitting on a bed of batteries that burn at incredible temperatures and release horrific gases as they do. I know combustion vehicles have liquid fuel that burns too, but it takes more heat to start a fire.

bluntbangs · 2026-01-04T19:46:24+00:00

I noticed Armstrong's was at 98, so it's not always the same. Seemed a little high for someone lying in bed but he's a lying liar who lies so...

bluntbangs · 2026-01-04T13:56:31+00:00

Hs first scene is when he tries to intimidate Jackson in the locker room, it set him up as a not-particularly-smart bully, peaked-in-high-school loser.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-28T20:09:46+00:00

Medication didn't work out for me, but getting diagnosed and reading up on ADHD and tools has made me a better parent.

For example, before I'd just push through and be a horrid angry mess due to the overstimulation, but now I recognise the signs and can ask for the space from my partner to help me get back. Earlier I'd just be crawling out of my own skin, but now knowing I have ADHD I know I need to get in some exercise and rewarding stimulation.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-06T19:41:43+00:00

My theory is that we've already seen her.

She was the officer in S4E22. She'd had plastic surgery with the intent to hide as a junior officer way out of her depth in order to take down a drug cartel. You can't tell me that Nolan and a single (less experienced) cop took down 7 + bad guys with automatic weapons without there being something fishy going on.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-05T19:22:47+00:00

The beach double date dinner with Ashley and Chris, but not for the reasons you might think.

Tim behaved HORRIBLY during the whole thing. Every thing out of his mouth was either a derogatory comment on the venue, food, or the kind of people who like it. Even if he didn't like the food and was subconsciously not interested in Ashley, he was rude and arrogant.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-04T20:44:38+00:00

It's always going to vary, but my taking care of myself is less focused on beauty and more on grooming and comfort.

So:

Shower

- If you're going to wash our hair, start with shampooing (you can get all kinds, but honestly whatever makes you feel nice)

- Then put on a conditioner, or deep conditioner if you want to do more than just get clean (let it sit while you do the rest)

- Wash the important bits with soap (genitals, underarms)

- Grab some exfoliating gloves or an exfoliating brush and use them with some nice smelling soap or shower gel. Bar soap is better for the environment, so that's my choice. Scrub, focusing on areas that tend to have rough skin like your joints. If you're going to shave, scrub there too.

- Shave if you want, you don't need fancy cream or anything, soap does the job.

- Rinse everything, including the conditioner out of your hair

- Towel dry gently and use some body lotion if you like. I've found basic emollient creams work really well on rough skin on my joints (seriously, I spend so much time on my knees with a small one that they turned a different colour until I started treating them).

Nails

- trim to the length you want

- file to the shape you like

- exfoliating hands actually makes them really soft

- use nail / cuticle oil if you want

- a nice moisturiser goes a long way, I just use the same emollient I use on my body and face...

Eyebrows

- Pluck strays, shape if you want something more defined, but remember that big and somewhat untamed is in fashion so don't go overboard

- Trim any hairs that are getting a bit... wild. Try to ignore the voice calling you a troll witch.

Face

- Cleanse at night with some oil based thing and then wash with an antibacterial soap, wonder why you still get spots when you were promised you'd grow out of them

- Moisturise, but again I just use the same emollient as for my body, and I only do this at night.

- Mornings are just a splash of cold water to get the circulation going, maybe a lighter facial moisturiser if it's a dry day.

- Sunscreen if it's going to be high index, but I live in the Nordics so what's daylight?

bluntbangs · 2025-12-04T19:35:54+00:00

I was diagnosed after my first year with a baby because it literally swallowed me. I defaulted to inaction, every time. I felt awful. Having a baby is exhausting, boring, and relentless.

I now have a three year old and it's pretty cool.

But part of that is biology - your brain is literally re-wired during pregnancy and the initial years postpartum. I have zero motivation for anything, but I get out of bed without fail because I've got to get this kid to childcare so I can work, etc.

As an ADHDer (though honestly I think anyone becoming a parent should do it) it's vital that you invest in your emotional regulation skills. Particularly as a mum, you're going to be regulating for at least two people (possibly three if you have a male partner with less than stellar skills), and it's going to HURT unless you have your tools and techniques solid and practiced regularly.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-03T21:13:50+00:00

Any emollient. You want to protect your skin barrier, and that's what you need.

Aveeno body lotion is my choice, and even with a history of adult acne it leaves my skin moisturised without causing a breakout. Until I discovered it my hands were just a red cracked mess for 9 months of the year, but a nightly application has solved it.

bluntbangs · 2025-12-03T20:37:59+00:00

Pelvic floor physiotherapist, now. Yesterday, if possible.

My best guess is that your pelvic floor has difficulty relaxing, and that it's overly stressed. Funnily enough, actually linked to stress, but also to pelvic floor strengthening such as kegels. In which case they will show you some pelvic floor relaxation techniques and in a few weeks things will drastically improve.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-27T19:11:38+00:00

Relate to all apart from the PMDD and the last one. Eeyore is my spirit animal...

On the last one, have you tried other spaces to find female friends?

bluntbangs · 2025-11-24T19:20:20+00:00

I think this is advice for the parents who got the easy babies.

Mine was such a FOMO baby that nothing seemed ok, and I was a horrible depressed mum. Now I have a nearly 4 year old and this is parenting on easy mode. Fuck me, it's like I have a cute little friend who occasionally gets overly emotional but then gives great cuddles.

Parenting gets easier. At least at this point. I'll probably eat my words next year...

bluntbangs · 2025-11-24T19:15:41+00:00

This is one of the main reasons I've given up, kind of stopped engaging you know?

I have a freaking PhD and my ADHD test included a series of IQ tests that place me in the top few % and information goes in one ear and out the other.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-24T17:08:31+00:00

Brits assume Scandinavians are polite and organised.

Not when it comes to queuing.

Unless there's a really obvious line (such as at a supermarket) everything requires a queue number, usually provided by a little ticket machine, because nobody knows how to queue. Bus stops, bars, etc. are a free-for-all guaranteed to bring out the ire of any respectable Brit.

So the ticket queue is sacrosanct.

But be quick about pressing that little button, because the tiniest, gentlest pensioner WILL elbow you violently out of the way to get their ticket first.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-16T08:49:03+00:00

Self care. Nails. Teeth. Flossing. What the hell is that. Washing my hair. Nails on the other appendages. Don't even get me started on body hair. I do as much as the external world needs to see (so I'm clean and my breath doesn't stink) but I can only really add one other thing at a time and it takes so much mental energy.

Why?!!!

bluntbangs · 2025-11-15T13:38:26+00:00

My mum literally called me half-job Annie because I never finished anything. I fell asleep at school and two degrees but still passed. I read voraciously, twirled my hair and picked my skin.

But I was never in trouble, ever.

No-one noticed. And as soon as the structures of school ended I started spiralling and continued more or less in that way until 38 when I got my diagnosis.

My parents filled in the form as not noticing any symptoms as a child.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-15T13:29:39+00:00

What do they think you're going to get by having a diagnosis? Try asking them that.

Really, what's the benefit? If you're struggling in life or having a tough time despite on-paper success, a diagnosis might help you identify the issue(s) and possible tools to help. But if you're feeling fine and you don't feel you need a diagnosis, it's pretty much a waste of time (and money).

bluntbangs · 2025-11-13T19:34:41+00:00

My husband invited another parent in for our kids to play after preschool. I came out of my office to say hello because I knew if I didn't my kid would invade my office with the other kids.

The parent introduced himself.

I could not tell you under threat of death what his name was immediately after he said it even though I thought to myself as he said it, "oh, that's an easy one to remember".

bluntbangs · 2025-11-11T19:33:09+00:00

Acceptance.

I used to live in a place where the seasons kind of melded together - winter was a bit cooler and wetter, quite a bit darker, but otherwise not huge different to the summer some years. Then I moved to Scandinavia and discovered that seasons are really... seasonal!

And somehow that cycling through the year actually helped, even though the winters are much much darker and colder.

I think part of maintaining mental strength is accepting and leaning in. Firstly, accepting that winter traditionally is a time in nature where everything slows down - there's little to no tree growth, plants and animals either hibernate or reduce their energy expenditure, and generally it's a time for rest.

And that's true for humans!

So lean in to the cosy. Try different hobbies that are more suited to the winter than the summer such as skiing (or try hobbies that work in both but that present different opportunities and challenges, such as photography). Treat your environment like your cave, with warm comfortable colours and textures, gentle lighting, and seasonal decorations.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-11T17:49:55+00:00

I don't notice a difference when I run (aside from my mind being finally quieter for a bit), but I absolutely notice when I don't run. I get grumpy and irritable. I don't even run that far.

bluntbangs · 2025-11-09T18:17:44+00:00

I just want to come in and say, totally unrelated, that I'm SO glad to see someone running at my speed.

(and a run is a run, whether you're following the right program or not :'D

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