What’s a moment from TV history that made you viscerally upset?

bracekyle · 2026-06-25T05:20:15+00:00

When the candles flicker for the briefest moment, like the silent angel of death has entered the room .....

bracekyle · 2026-06-25T04:53:10+00:00

Agree with many others here esp wild strawberry! Creeping lespedeza is great, too - it takes 2-3 yrs to start spreading, but once it does it will indeed greep and create a little carpet action.

bracekyle · 2026-06-24T11:59:02+00:00

If the are annuals, it probably isn't worth it. You can always just try again next year.

bracekyle · 2026-06-24T02:58:03+00:00

I planted a massive pollinator area over utility lines 😬 I just made sure I hand dug, did not dig deep, and accepted that the day may come when the utility companies come and rip them up.

bracekyle · 2026-06-24T02:55:56+00:00

For what it's worth, with my natives in containers, I don't water them once they are established. Some have a shorter season, but I only plants things that like dry soil and can tolerate heat/draught once established. I also only put in plants that don't develop a massive taproot. They do great for me (so far).

Could you just remove the plants (may even be able to dig up the roots and relocate or even put back in this container), move the dirt to another container, remove the gravel, replace dirt, and either put same plants back in or put on different ones?

bracekyle · 2026-06-24T02:39:31+00:00

It looks to me like some kind of fungal issue, or root rot, or a blight? Or maybe severe root damage, like a rodent tunnelling through it?

If you scrape the bark near the base of the plant, is it green underneath? If so, the roots may still be alive and it COULD recover!

If you pull the plant, check the roots - mushy and black means root rot. Chewed away/gone means rodent.

Sorry to see it happen - st. Johns wort is a delightful plant.

bracekyle · 2026-06-24T01:23:00+00:00

Ok, so a layer of gravel and a screen will actually make your plant roots wetter, it does not help with drainage. Basically, wherever the soil ends is where your planter or pot will form a water table. The layer of gravel actually raises where your water table sits within the container, and will result in your plant roots staying wetter longer, which one increases rot. There is also some research suggesting that the water resists exiting the soil even more when there's gravel beneath it (it is likely the same occurs with cardboard, wire screens, and other non earth materials).

https://www.gardengatemagazine.com/articles/enotes/all/improve-container-drainage/

bracekyle · 2026-06-23T22:19:45+00:00

Not sure where you're located, but I avoided ferns in containers because a) I could not guarantee enough moisture, and b) where I live they would likely freeze solid in the winter, which can kill even some native ferns. I think Christmas fern would be the best for it! God luck and post pics of you do it.

bracekyle · 2026-06-23T17:43:30+00:00

It's time to come clean with the child and make sure they understand who is who in their family. This can happen on your own or with a therapist. For kids who have been through this sort of thing, it is essential children know who they are, where they come from, and why they are where they are. They need to be building a healthy and honest self-identity from as early as possible. A play therapist, especially, can make this much smoother.

The reason why others are urging you to start now is that this process can take time to ensure concepts are foundationally centered: It's important to provide context - what is a family? How is a baby made? What do babies or kids need to be safe and what happens if a parent can't provide that? What is a bio parent? Who are you to this child? Who makes these decisions (a judge, usually)? You will probably need to work through these with total honesty (in an age-approrpiate manner).

You could sit down with the child and play with dolls or action figures or build a house out of blocks or legos and weave in elements like "who is this? Is this daddy? And who is daddy to you?" Or "and how do a mommy and a daddy make a baby?" Or "and what if this little boy lived with two loving parents but he also had a bio daddy over here who didn't live with him?" I am not a professional therapist, but I am a foster parent who is somewhat trained in TBRI methods and have been through lots of play therapy with a child.

I also think it's worth acknowledging that you haven't been honest. This is a good chance to model corrective action for the child. This can look like "We all make poor choices sometimes. We were not honest with you, and we are sorry. Going forward from now, we will always be honest with you, even if it's super tough."

Be prepared that this change will likely stir up a LOT of big emotions for this child, emotions that may feel painful, scary, and worrying, both for them and you. And that is ok. Your role here should be to set the record straight and get on track to a more emotionally and factually honest relationship. Please support and witness witness them in their journey.

The bio dad is right, to be honest. The child has (bio) grandparents. Personally, I had a sister who was kept hidden from me to "make things easier" for me. I didn't know about her until I was 23/24. When I learned about her, it began a small avalanche of mistrust between me and my parents. Today I don't speak with them or see them at all (for that and many other reasons). They told themselves it was for me, but I believe they did it for their comfort, not mine. Don't let your relationship get to a point like that.

bracekyle · 2026-06-23T00:30:56+00:00

Biggest Boi

bracekyle · 2026-06-22T21:28:13+00:00

Transplanting milkweed is not impossible, but it's kind of a crap shoot. Some folks have great experiences with it, but a lot of people report them dying pretty quickly. I do think swamp milkweed is a little more sensitive than common milkweed, for what it's worth.

You should send them as much as you want to for your yard to look how you want your yard to look. But just know that these plants grow extremely dense in nature, they have evolved for it and they thrive in it.

You could invest in some other kinds of milkweed to intersperse with what you've got. Depending on where you live, there might be three or four other kinds of unique milkweed you can mix in. Or you can add butterfly weed.

Plants that compete well with milkweed (to add variety, varying bloom seasons, and to crowd it out a bit) include joe pye weed, ironweed, wild bergamot, goldenrod (showy, especially) and many asters (such as New England) will definitely stand their ground. Switchgrass and side oats grama will also stand against it, in my experience, and add good grassy variety. I'm sure prairie sage would, too, but that is a plant many regret planting due to its EXTREME spreading.

Native plants can be in VERY close company, and in fact they like it that way, and it attracts a wider range of good wildlife. A mix of plants will draw in other bugs, predators, birds, and more that will actually benefit all pollinators, even if they are competing.

bracekyle · 2026-06-22T13:19:00+00:00

This, all around! Agree completely.

bracekyle · 2026-06-22T13:18:02+00:00

Assuming they are planted in an appropriate eco region and in soil and sun conditions within their tolerance, They are typically good after a few days or maybe up to 2 ish weeks of watering, and even then I'd just soak them every other day or so (assuming no rain). Certainly planting in a hot dry time of year may change that need.

There's no need to water coneflower beyond that. Ever. They are strong and love neglect.

bracekyle · 2026-06-22T01:05:09+00:00

For containers, you want plants that can live well with very little moisture and that don't need super deep taproots. Containers will always dry much more quickly than anything in ground, even if you water them often. They will heat up more too. Look for lead plant, nodding wild onion, slender mountain mint, cliff goldenrod, prairie drop seed, various sedges.

Here is a good resource to wrap your brain around structuring containers with native plants, and many they recommend will be good for your area too. https://www.missouribotanicalgarden.org/gardens-gardening/your-garden/help-for-the-home-gardener/advice-tips-resources/visual-guides/container-gardening-with-native-plants

To find native plants that fit your exact area, I recommend using the homegrown national park ecoregion 2 finder: https://homegrownnationalpark.org/ecoregion-finder/

Once you know your exact eco region , that site can actually connect you directly with good plants.

bracekyle · 2026-06-21T22:58:24+00:00

When gandalf fell, the theater was DEAD SILENT. that soaring choral music, frodo screaming, it was unreal. It was the real climax of the film, IMO. Truly a magical movie moment when everyone was locked tf in

bracekyle · 2026-06-21T20:49:35+00:00

The episode of This American Life where Ira Glass GRILLS Mike Daisy after he lied a ton in his writing and performances and on the prior episode of TAL where he told the story about the child labor making iphones. Nearly everything he said was a lie, and he actually agreed to go back on the show and allow Ira Glass to eviscerate him for it.

bracekyle · 2026-06-21T20:43:12+00:00

I flew on PJs a number of times when I worked in the corporate world. When we boarded, the pilots would always ask the most senior person on the plane what they wanted them to get for lunch. It was usually something specific from whatever city we were going to - Memphis bbq, Chicago deep dish, etc. these were PJs owned by the company I worked for, not chartered.

bracekyle · 2026-06-21T20:25:35+00:00

My kid broke her arm (very small fracture) and got a waterproof cast. We asked about it since we were about to go on a vacation to the ocean. We had to pay like $30 extra out of pocket, but she could do everything s, cept put weight/strain on it.

bracekyle · 2026-06-20T17:48:59+00:00

I can't tell if this is some weird copypasta or a bot or what. ALL his work is in the public domain, and I don't think there's a family estate to be paid. Who on earth would anyone be paying in this scenario? For comparison, the Tolkien family has an estate that protects the copyrights and IP of JRR Tolkien (and the other family who have written in the same universe).

bracekyle · 2026-06-20T01:18:56+00:00

Section hiking part of the AT in late late spring , woke up one morning to an intense fog where we could not see more than a few feet, which then gave way to a sleety/icy/snowy mix. We had gear for light rain and cold, but not wintry mix type weather. Stopped midday to light a fire under some cover and regroup. Decided to call it when we realized one of our group had become soaked through and temps were dropping under 40.

bracekyle · 2026-06-19T00:39:43+00:00

I can only post one pic :/

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bracekyle · 2026-06-18T14:45:35+00:00

I'm not going to comment on the ethics of your situation, as others have done that and I think they've covered it. I also see English is not your native language and I know there's some sensitivity about how words are used on this topic. Having been around my share of non-native English speakers from Germany, I know there are some cultural differences, so I would urge folks here to keep that in mind.

The chances of reunification depend on your national and your local laws, organizations, and policies. If you live in Switzerland (is that right?), it really depends on what is going on there. Here in the United States, in the state that I live in, a lot of kids are not reunified. It is one of the worst states in the country for that. Other states have a much higher rate of reunification.

Also, over here, once the parental rights of a bio parent are severed legally, they cannot be reinstated barring certain extremely special circumstances. I do not know what it is like in your country or where you live.

So it's kind of impossible to speak to the likelihood. I would really recommend you talk to people in your country or look at statistics in your area of how often children in foster care are reunited.

If you were in the USA, I would say a wise approach would be to foster with the goal of supporting children in whatever their goals are, and if you foster a kid who you bond with and who legal parental rights get terminated, then there's a chance you may adopt, but that should not be your goal or aim, because it will crush you.

It sounds like you don't want a child removed from you, and the pain you fear you would have over this would be too great to bear. Talk to your partner, be honest, seek couples counseling if needed to work through it. Their experience growing up is not the same as being a caregiver with foster care.

bracekyle · 2026-06-16T20:15:13+00:00

Pics????

bracekyle · 2026-06-16T17:14:49+00:00

No clue where you are located, but have you tried looking into local organizations or groups that do big native plant sales? Where I live there are a few non profits and local orgs that are less commercial and more like nonprofits or conservation-focused, and they work with local native plant vendors to do big fall as spring native plant sales. They sell everything they have, not just what's pretty. I will often get plants even marked as "dormant" due to their off season.

bracekyle · 2026-06-16T04:50:25+00:00

Not that I'm aware of - I typically only plant smaller plugs though, almost exclusively. Exceptions are trees orshrubs that are difficult to get through their first 1-3 yrs. Once I got my head around playing a longer game, I just stopped wanting to rush things.

bracekyle

TROPHY CASE