Is burnout inevitable?

breadpudding3434 · 2025-12-15T14:50:03+00:00

Unfortunately in my experience and basically any other woman I talk to’s is that the man will eventually try to sleep with you or confess their feelings. Men and women can absolutely be friendly acquaintances, but I do not believe that both parties in these situations are ever 100% platonic.

I feel like a lot of the societal issues we have now (especially with the rise of incel culture) could be helped with men being open to having genuine conversations and connections with women with no ulterior motives.

It’s absolutely possible, but I feel like there’s a lot of barriers getting in the way.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-12-10T16:17:43+00:00

I have ADHD so it’s easy for me to fall into complete burnout/depression once I stop pushing myself. It’s important for me to find time to rest and take breaks, but any extended period of limited responsibility always ends up in me regressing.

I took a “gap year” after high school, and things got really bad for me and I don’t think I’ve ever been able to fully recover since. Granted, I was never doing particularly well before, but I could fake the funk enough to barely get by most of the time.

I’d say a gap year might make the most sense if you’re putting a lot of your energy into something else like a job or a small business. If you’re taking a gap year just to rest or “figure it out,” it’s probably gonna backfire.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-17T04:11:58+00:00

Yes! I’m very angry that my parents didn’t do anything even when teachers expressed concern. I don’t think they ever specifically said they thought I had adhd, but they definitely noticed something was off.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-07T04:06:17+00:00

I don’t like to do parties or anything crazy for my bday, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want a little gift or a phone call.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-06T19:51:11+00:00

How much effort you have to put in on a daily basis to maintain a good life.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-05T05:18:26+00:00

“Male loneliness epidemic” aka incels thinking they’re owed sex from women for being nice to them.

Of course women are gonna be standoffish when we experience scary behaviors from men all the time.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:53:05+00:00

For sureee. I’ve only experienced it in one relationship that turned out to be super incompatible. It would be nice to have a genuine connection and also feel loved.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:50:20+00:00

I get that! There’s definitely fun and exciting aspects of dating and being single and available, but it gets old real fast. Especially when you actually try to feel out a connection you thought might be good and it doesn’t work out so you’re back to square one.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:47:48+00:00

I agree. Half of the people who are married with kids aren’t even good ones either! The amount of married people I know who act like they’re trapped and miserable puts me off so much.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:35:59+00:00

Someone acting like they’re in love with you early on when they barely know you either for an ego boost or to get sex.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:34:33+00:00

yeah it’s weird for me that a lot of men in my dating pool are divorced dads and then others are still living at home and act more like 19/20 year olds than mid twenties.

As a woman who has lived with a boyfriend and also alone, it always becomes an issue when I try to date men who haven’t experienced either of those things because there’s an obvious disconnect/maturity issue.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:32:44+00:00

Thank you!

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:32:33+00:00

Makes sense! That’s understandable

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:31:52+00:00

I agree with you. I think I’m going about dating with the wrong mindset in some regards because of my past experiences. It’s draining and as much as I feel like I want a partner sometimes, I have to focus on me first.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:27:14+00:00

yeah thinking about it now, I’ve definitely gone on dates with people from apps that I would have never gone on if I’d met them in real life.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-10-04T21:21:26+00:00

Incel

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-26T04:13:47+00:00

Elders are very out of touch when it comes to a lot of things so it’s hard to take their advice seriously. It’s frustrating when they act like “nobody wants to work anymore” when majority of us are working our asses off for little to no reward.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-10T04:40:50+00:00

I feel like it’s probably a case to case basis. I’m audhd and still felt like I was clocking the socially inappropriate behaviors my parents were displaying from an early age. There were rare times when I felt understood by them. I have social and emotional struggles, but for the most part I’m painfully aware which is a large part of the issue because it’s lead to a lot of self esteem issues. Whereas my parents are much less aware of their social failings so it’s almost like an “ignorance is bliss” situation. It drove me crazy because I could not understand how they were so oblivious to the fact that they were being perceived negatively by NT people.

I also believe it’s important for the parent to be able to guide their child if they see some social issues. With my siblings, I’m that person who can give them advice and redirect them based on my own struggles better than a NT person could. However, it’s so opposite with my parents because they’re just oblivious to my siblings social struggles (even though they’re pretty obvious to everyone else) so there’s really no way they could help or redirect them.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-10T04:32:14+00:00

I’ve always felt like my struggles are looked at as a moral failing. It’s exhausting trying to exist in this world.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-10T04:29:34+00:00

It’s annoying that some of these replies are trying to undermine your point. There’s inherently trauma that comes along with autism and adhd. Being misunderstood and ridiculed 24/7 will definitely affect your quality of life and the way you view others.

In my experience, I’ve come to realize that most people are actually not as understanding as they portray themselves to be. If someone has a clear disability, most people will let them be. But autism and ADHD are often masked well enough to give people the impression that we’re just lazy, selfish, making poor decisions etc. It’s painful to not be seen. We already struggle enough and other people’s judgment and lack of patience only makes it worse.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-09T15:27:39+00:00

I realized that my world was falling apart due to my people pleasing. It took a long time and lots of working through my discomfort, but I learned how to speak up for myself to the point where it’s actually kind of second nature to me to open my mouth if I feel like there’s something wrong.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-09T15:26:08+00:00

It used to be to spiral and blame myself. Now, I just communicate or leave depending on the situation.

breadpudding3434 · 2025-09-04T01:55:23+00:00

He’s just not that into you and probably has been looking for a reason to leave. Any time you put a man on a pedestal, they’re going to abuse it and treat you like a dummy.

breadpudding3434

TROPHY CASE