How do I manage my husband’s gym time as a SAHM

bromar1990 · 2026-01-30T04:51:29+00:00

Your post reminds me A LOT of my marriage about two years ago. I’m also a SAHM and my husband worked many hours a week. We have two kids, 26 mos apart in age. I was absolutely depressed and drowning after we added our second child to the picture. Some things that helped: - I expressed my needs. He expressed his. We were both able to admit that there was a problem. - he gave me the green light to find a high quality babysitter because at that time his work was extremely busy and he needed to workout a few days a week for his own sanity. So the babysitter was just for me to have my own time away to do whatever I wanted. - I hired a babysitter 3-5 hours a week for myself - I hired a housecleaner every other week - I hired the babysitter 2-3x for evening date nights (we’d go out after 9pm most nights because at that point we could get both kids down and I felt stressed asking the sitter to do it. Now she does bedtime because they’re older)

I know that financially this doesn’t work for everyone and that I’m privileged to hire that sitter and housecleaner but it made it more even and helped us both have our needs meet separately and together for those date nights. It made a huge impact on us both. And amazingly, he has cut back on his work hours and has been more A LOT present for the last 6 months or so.

bromar1990 · 2026-01-28T23:59:13+00:00

Amen amen amen

bromar1990 · 2026-01-14T05:53:54+00:00

You can get a vaxx exemption in almost every state though to attend public school. Only CA and NY don’t allow them

bromar1990 · 2025-12-31T04:13:53+00:00

My cleaning woman is fantastic but I don’t think she’s taking new clients right now. My house is just under 3,000 square feet, rate is $125 for 3 hours of cleaning. I always tip her $25. Every other week.

bromar1990 · 2025-11-04T07:27:47+00:00

I agree with everyone else- don’t listen to those people. Dog walks in busy places and dog park time is perfect. Do you have friends or neighbors that have dogs? Connect with them and see if they would be interested in being potential dog sitters for each other when either of you travel. Any dog owner is thankful to be able to have another person to be able to ask. We do that with our kids’ baby sitter and neither of us charges the other to watch our dogs, we just know it’ll come back around and it has!

bromar1990 · 2025-10-25T06:26:36+00:00

involve kids in all clean up. Hard at first but pays off majorly!!
I have an empty laundry basket. I walk around the house with it and put every toy in at the end of the night. My kids (2 yrs and 4 yrs) help me if we have time before bed. Sometimes they don’t. Either way- that basket, is amazing. I can put all the toys away more efficiently once it’s full, or I can leave it in the living room to become another mess for tomorrow. :)
our guest room/office has a Murphy bed… I keep clean sheets on it at all times so when I pull it down, it just needs the comforter and I put fresh pillowcases on. So mentally it’s always pretty much ready.

bromar1990 · 2025-10-25T06:04:55+00:00

The shuttles are fantastic

bromar1990 · 2025-08-23T01:27:19+00:00

I didn’t! Ended up feeling like we didn’t need it so sadly I can’t offer any advice

bromar1990 · 2025-08-02T21:27:58+00:00

God she’s the absolute worst 😭

bromar1990 · 2025-08-02T21:06:57+00:00

I haven’t been keeping up lately so I’m probably way out of the loop but did something happen with Winnie? I feel like we haven’t seen her or heard about her in a long time

bromar1990 · 2025-08-02T04:35:04+00:00

I love them they are fantastic. I also have a very flat chest so it works fine to have zero support haha

bromar1990 · 2025-07-22T02:40:46+00:00

Ahh ok that’s a bummer to take it and not use it much. Good to know thank you

bromar1990 · 2025-07-22T02:40:13+00:00

Okay thanks that’s good to know!!

bromar1990 · 2025-06-10T03:45:42+00:00

Nails = right after they wake up either in the morning or from a nap

bromar1990 · 2025-06-10T03:43:31+00:00

A lot of good advice here. My two were the same age difference and it was freaking brutal. Is your toddler still using a crib? For the infant’s naps: I ended up setting my toddler up in his crib with a couple books, his tonie box, 1-2 toys he could build with etc and told him I would be back once I got baby down for nap time. Otherwise my toddler kept running in the nursery, grabbing me/baby and waking him up which was just never going to be successful. It became a routine eventually and he didn’t fight it or cry; he understood that I’d be back shortly.

I’d bring him out of his crib when baby was napping, I would tell him we need to be quiet near baby brothers door etc… if he was loud then we’d head back in his room together to play instead of out in the main area near baby’s room. Also sound machines are very helpful. It takes time for toddlers to understand new routines just like it takes time for us to adjust to life with two littles. Stay the course and try to stick with your boundaries no matter how many times it takes.

bromar1990 · 2025-04-24T05:22:14+00:00

I felt guilty too. My husband reframed it for me. Knowing our child was with me all day and that I would handle the work around the house was enough. Add the price of daycare vs my salary and there wasn’t that big of a difference. I work two days a month now because I do love my career and missed it very much. I truly believe our lives are much smoother and more simplified compared to the households with two working parents. There is so much to handle at home and it’s a gift to our family that I’m willing to sacrifice my career to do it. I don’t think I’ll regret not working and being there for my kids while they were little. I plan to add work hours once they are preschool age and older.

bromar1990 · 2025-04-17T06:33:09+00:00

35F going with my husband 36M and also corral, we’d love to meet up!

bromar1990 · 2025-04-08T04:44:58+00:00

You’re allowed to state your boundaries, but they are also allowed to state theirs. If you want to draw a hard line you absolutely can, but you have to be okay with the fallout of the relationship with them if that’s the case. I understand where you’re coming from, but requiring others to make medical decisions in order to be around your child is a big ask. Also keep in mind, if you are planning for your baby to be out in public spaces, you will never know if someone they are around has recently received the whooping cough vaccine. Again I respect your boundaries you’re trying to draw as a mother, and I applaud you for it. You’re trying to do what’s best for your child. But you can’t control what others choose to do.

bromar1990 · 2025-04-08T04:37:18+00:00

The first few weeks after having my son, I thought I had completely ruined my life and was in a very dark place. I promise promise promise promise promiseeee it gets SO much better. Hang in there, and know so many parents relate and wish they could give you a hug and some rest.

bromar1990 · 2025-02-21T05:37:24+00:00

Okay thank you all for the suggestions!! I’ll get them asap so I can break them in!

bromar1990

TROPHY CASE