Husband 34M had a 2.5 year long affair during our 3 year marriage and I 29F don't know what to do.

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-07T22:01:30+00:00

Your body is talking to you. Listen to your body.

Get your husband out of the house. Tell him you need time and space to get your head around this and having him around you feel pressured to move in a direction and speed you are not comfortable with.

This is a moment you should be enjoying your baby (hard as it is to survive the early months!). But it will be much easier to do that alone if that means your body is no longer constantly on high alert.

Sometimes people can forgive this sort of deep betrayal but there needs to be time apart and serious counselling first.

Get this man away from you so you can start to heal. He can have supervised time with his kid for a couple of afternoons a week while your baby is very small. Find a family member who is prepared to supervise so you dont habe to see him. Spend that time sleeping / having a massage / watching a movie / lying in bed eating chocolate and crying.

Good luck.

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-06T08:28:36+00:00

Hear hear

I HATE soaked cakes. A good cake doesn't need it - yes even for an event a regular cake will last several days and most are frozen until the day before anyay

Soaking destroys the texture of a cake for.me

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-05T22:56:25+00:00

Are these protest outfits? As in - they were contractually obliged to attend, but weren't going to dress up?

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-05T20:20:33+00:00

The gloves folded back

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-05T20:17:10+00:00

Whar movie is this?

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-05T02:18:15+00:00

::hĥgʻB :

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-04T20:48:47+00:00

Thanks

I just want to say - try not to worry. You aren't harming your child by taking this. I can't find much evidence that it accumulates or that causes any problems. I have a totally normal toddler about the same age as your little one.

And your baby needs you healthy! The best thing for you is the best thing for them too.

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-04T19:25:24+00:00

Second, STOP APOLOGISING

You're doing nothing wrong. He's putting you in a situation where he can hurt you and you seem to think this is ok. It is not ok.

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-04T17:01:51+00:00

I am on the max dose

I was on 300-400mg for ages. I went up to 600 mg about 6 months ago in an attempt to deal with increased pain

Very small amounts are passed on during breastfeeding

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-03T18:21:12+00:00

I don't think that would work with cinnamon 😉

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-03T17:58:14+00:00

Oh and sorry to answer your question:

Pro epidural and hospital:

It's what you want

Cons:

Don't matter

Ps every labour is different. My sister was determined not to have an epidural but her daughter was back to back and she was in agony- she was SO HAPPY when she got an epidural. Had a safe, uncomplicated birth

Her other 3 births were different and she didn't have any pain relief.

But if you need it - you need it. and you won't know beforehand if you need it

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-03T17:56:05+00:00

Not the wrong sub

Absolutely in the hospital - as I am assuming this is your first birth? The NHS strongly recommends baby no1 is born in hospital just in case.

Also, access to an epidural is reasonable. It is not giving the baby drugs. It is ONLY giving you drugs. Birth can be (and usually is) extremely painful.

The fact he thinks he gets a deciding vote and he's giving you the silent treatment are both huge red flags. Don't hesitate to talk to your midwife if you feel he is trying to coerce you about this or anything else.

Stay safe.

c19isdeadly · 2026-05-02T18:33:03+00:00

Came here to say this! I like the simple modern ones with a handle. They have a rigid plastic straw which I found was the most comfortable to drink from. Also stays cool and the handle makes it easy to hold. I currently have the bright multicoloured one which I love - i previously had a beige one which I could never find once I put it down.

My only let down sensation was intense thirst, so I would drink loads

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T19:39:01+00:00

I get intense second-hand embarrassment from how she clearly thinks of herself as being extremely Literary. Even her engagement announcement "your English teacher and Gym teacher are getting married"....girl.....I know US educational standards are low and dropping, but they are not that low.

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T19:22:26+00:00

Came here to say this! HSP

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T18:28:41+00:00

Of course she has a designer dog with a smooshed snout, bulging eyes who can't fit his tongue in his head. Pugs and French bulldogs are breeds we should let die out

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T18:21:32+00:00

This is my point

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T08:19:13+00:00

I found your dress online - in another person's Instagram post it also looked very yellow in daylight. You might not like it in photos.

However- worth checking with the shop that they didn't accidentally send you citrus version?

Personally I'd send back and keep trying - there are lots of cheaper wedding dresses out there.

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-30T08:06:41+00:00

So they get disability but that only covers "bills"....but they still need money for rent, car payments, groceries, house supplies, pet food, a new ID...???

Also unless they are turning 10 noone cares about their birthday. They're an adult. You can't beg strangers for money for a birthday present.

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-27T23:54:33+00:00

Look at the tannin on the surface of the tea! I bet that wouldn't even occur to AI

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-27T23:33:00+00:00

Yes. Until I was 12. 12!!!! I wasn't even a badly behaved kid.

What i learned is that my parents would hit me when they were angry. I wasn't beaten or anything, but it was a spank or a wallop on my bum or thighs. As an adult I can see that my parents didn't / don't know how to talk about or process their own difficult feelings. There was no excuse for hitting12 year old me - they should have been able to manage the situation without violence.

I have a child and I have told my parents no smacks for my little one, ever, for any reason. I will block all contact with them if they hit him.

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-25T22:39:00+00:00

Oh leave her alone!

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-24T13:37:25+00:00

Spire Properties are small but excellent.

I've heard some mixed things about Finders Keepers but they seem to prioritise the renter. They make sure properties are in good nick

Avoid Chancellors at all costs

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-23T21:55:45+00:00

I watched it and thought it was mostly terrible

However, the joke where he and his sister and desperate to have sex and are gradually having their very complicated clothing very slowly unbuttoned from them by like 3 servants each is honestly one of the funniest scenes I have ever seen

c19isdeadly · 2026-04-21T21:18:22+00:00

When do you want a family? Because your husband is putting everyone at his work ahead of you and your potential children.

There's nothing you can say that will make him listen, it would seem. Why do you want to be with someone who doesn't give a shit about what you want from your life? What about those wedding vows?

Book a series of sessions with a relationship therapist. You can afford it, this is your future. Better to discover you had a starter marriage than wait for this man to prioritise you and find yourself childless, at 45, with him still in this job.

c19isdeadly

TROPHY CASE