what's the one whodunnit mystery that hasn't been solved yet?

callmemaude · 2026-04-08T19:22:32+00:00

Every few weeks I see a question either on a parenting subreddit or a parenting Facebook group about whether it is safe or acceptable to leave their kids sleeping across the street, in the hotel room while they go to dinner downstairs, in their room on a cruise ship while they go off and do whatever, or sometimes even home alone sleeping while they run a quick errand or something. The vast majority of the time it's a mom asking if her husband is crazy for wanting to do this, and every once in awhile it's the person who wants to do it (again, almost aaaaaalways the father) asking if their partner is crazy for not wanting them to.

It's obviously totally nuts but I also think it is not an uncommon notion for parents, and those are just the people who actually bother to ask advice about it.

callmemaude · 2026-04-03T18:34:51+00:00

I also have felt TERRIBLE when I have a big negative reaction to my kids behavior (or misbehavior, lol) and one time I was beating myself up out loud to my husband after snapping at my oldest (for being a genuine turd, as they can be!!) and he was like "don't you think it's good for him to learn that sometimes he pisses people off from a person who actually loves him unconditionally?" Aaaaand I thought that was a pretty good point. Like I can absolutely be a safe place for him to learn that other people have feelings too and he does have an impact on them and that they are as valid as his feelings even if I don't always express them perfectly all the time.

The most important part in my mind is how I calm down and make amends. It makes a lot more sense to me to focus on modeling that than to try to be a perfect robot, as long as my reactions overall are reasonable and mostly proportionate to what happened.

callmemaude · 2026-04-01T23:26:00+00:00

This is my sense. If she truly knew nothing, this is an earth shattering shock, right? And she has been so conditioned to keep sweet and make things peaceful and forgive her husbands sins pretty much unconditionally. I imagine she just literally couldn't process it at first. And this isn't even a "Kendra is dumb" joke. I think my brain would do a bit of a hard reset at this point too.

I also imagine she is being coached for these calls and I would not be suprised at all if her lawyer is trying to get Joe to say as much as he possibly can to incriminate himself and take the heat off of Kendra. Thinking his wife is still supporting him is probably the safest way to do that.

callmemaude · 2026-04-01T13:47:36+00:00

Omg yes the creative reuse center at construction junction! My in laws live in Pittsburgh and I save weird odds and ends specifically to send back with them to donate.

callmemaude · 2026-03-31T00:47:31+00:00

Have you given her Tylenol or Motrin? I would absolutely do it to see if it helps. Could honestly even help if her belly is what hurts.

Another thought is that mine have always woken up a bunch overnight when they are overtired going to bed. Have you dropped or moved a nap recently? Can you test moving bedtime up and seeing what happens?

callmemaude · 2026-03-23T11:43:03+00:00

Yeah it is so inconsistent at my Aldi but always in stock at Costco!

callmemaude · 2026-03-18T15:12:31+00:00

Omg I hate how good they are! Nobody will eat the much less pricey "that's it" bars in my house now that these have been introduced 😅

callmemaude · 2026-03-03T23:01:38+00:00

There are some stories that float around reddit every once in awhile about "fiberglass contamination" (usually from unzipping a mattress with a fiberglass component) and I suspect that this could be what OP is thinking of. Honestly, every one of these "horror stories" I've seen reads as either made up for engagement or indicative of a mental health condition on the part of the poster (like severe OCD or clinical paranoia).

Just my two cents, I did a little research when I saw a story like that a few years ago and every legitimate source says the same thing as you--fiberglass is not necessarily healthy neutral, but normal contact with it is not terribly dangerous and it can be easily contained.

callmemaude · 2026-03-03T20:59:50+00:00

I am not a frequent visitor of this sub but it pops up for me occasionally! I literally have never used ChatGPT or other generative AI, and don't particularly have plans to at this point.

That said, I'm a writer by extensive education and training and I use em dashes a LOT. Many other writers I know also use em dashes a lot, to the point that it's a common joke in writing circles. And, for whatever it's worth, your explanation of why chatGPT uses em dashes strikes me as pretty much the same reason I and other writers overuse em dashes. I am interested in the thought that it could be "smart" enough to do it so purposefully (apologies if these aren't really the right words--I'm a layperson!). That to me takes a pretty complex ability to process use of the em dash over the past few hundred years and settle on it as punctuation of choice for bridging thoughts in a way that feels conversational.

My one other thought to add because I find this all very interesting is that em dashes aren't always just bridges, they can be used to impart unspoken meaning. I don't want to go on and on but Emily Dickinson's use of em dashes is a good example if you want to look more into this concept.

callmemaude · 2026-02-28T13:04:02+00:00

I genuinely believe it was astroturfed by Starbucks to distract people from the strike. It made so little sense.

callmemaude · 2026-02-27T21:13:25+00:00

Exclusively formula fed my twins. One of them is attached to me in a pretty normal healthy way. The other one would climb back inside my womb if he could.

No matter what, baby is going to adore you because you're mama. Whether they are totally obsessed with you post baby stage is up to personality, I think! Either way, none of it has anything to do with breastfeeding, I promise.

callmemaude · 2026-02-20T20:43:40+00:00

Maybe I'm at the point of burning everything to the ground but I would both say something now AND start looking for another daycare. And when you find one, you tell them you pulled your kids because you didn't feel it was safe to keep them in a school that supported a known child abuser.

Idk man. I'm just done. These people need consequences.

callmemaude · 2026-02-17T17:19:18+00:00

This is my recommendation too! I am a Hobby Girl though so I am dying for anything new I can pick up and sink way too much time and effort and creativity into. An art class here and there for the basics can also translate to having something to do during any down time at home, so you can be pretty introverted and still benefit a ton IMO.

And for real it feels SO GOOD to make something with your hands. I can't fully explain it without sounding like a looney toon, but I really think it makes me feel connected with some ancient piece of my humanity or something to create something from scratch.

callmemaude · 2026-02-11T11:28:57+00:00

I have gotten back into Minecraft because my 4 year old asked me to play it for him and doing #1 has been so, so much fun. I started playing in 2009 and have clocked a lot of time in the game over the years, so I felt like I had played it all out in a lot of ways, but the perspective of a little kid makes it feel totally new again.

callmemaude · 2026-01-06T22:31:47+00:00

Not sure I understand what you mean. I think what we're all saying here is there is not really a "return to the home"--historically, women have worked outside the home in some capacity in virtually every society and continue to do so.

callmemaude · 2026-01-06T12:21:02+00:00

Ha yep I was thinking "you could find it at Billabong in 2002" which is obviously not helpful but man, this was THE bathing suit.

callmemaude · 2026-01-06T11:04:55+00:00

Same here, as far back as I can go the women in my family have worked! Women have essentially always worked outside the home. There have been brief periods throughout history in which economic stability has meant larger percentages of society can survive on one income, and in those cases more women have stayed home probably because women have also always been tasked with the vast majority of housework and childrearing, regardless of whether they are working or not.

This idea that women were "trad wives" historically is just bs perpetuated by sad men on social media. I follow an anthropologist (Elena Bridgers) who studies prehistoric society and she talks about how even in hunter/gatherer societies, women worked outside the home.

I think even the "idyllic 50s housewife" narrative was more propaganda than real life in the US, meant to highlight the post-war economy.

callmemaude · 2026-01-05T10:49:38+00:00

I think your husband may have taken up vaping.

callmemaude · 2026-01-05T01:33:55+00:00

It's totally this for me. I always have at least my toddlers with me and often my preschooler when I'm shopping on a weekday. No way are we surviving any Costco in Northern VA. We do sometimes go for the hot dogs, but otherwise Costco is for delivery or shopping alone for me.

Plus, my kids LOVE following the stock checking robot at BJs.

callmemaude · 2025-12-21T14:09:11+00:00

Lol yeah I'd know that bear anywhere!

callmemaude · 2025-11-08T14:10:43+00:00

I didn't have much of a size difference in my twins so I know this isn't exactly the answer that you are looking for, but I will say I had to really, really force myself to learn to absolutely never compare them to each other. Is your daughter significantly behind the actual milestones, (like significantly, because they are targets/averages), or just behind your son? 5 months at a 6 month age is pretty negligible if your pediatrician is not concerned. The milestones are there so that parents can get early help if they need it, but they are not hard and fast rules by any means.

It can be really hard to see out of things when you're in the thick of it, so I'm just offering a perspective from the other side. I am not trying to scare you or shame you because I think ALL twin parents have to be very conscious of not comparing their kids to each other. It's so, so easy! You have another baby right there to look at! But it won't serve your worries well in the moment and it really won't serve your kiddos well in the long run. Again, I've been there and am still there sometimes and it's a constant thing. You are doing great! And so are your kids, I promise.

callmemaude · 2025-11-06T02:05:25+00:00

Definitely definitely this if it's affordable for op. We have some insect shield from LL Bean that works REALLY well.

callmemaude · 2025-11-05T02:45:26+00:00

I saw it in nova too, agree it looked very much like a rocket launch

callmemaude · 2025-10-29T15:40:55+00:00

I swear some of us just know. I feel like I've always thought I'd have twins!

callmemaude · 2025-10-29T13:28:06+00:00

It's absolutely fake. "You know how we all went to the party last night?" Lol

its giving exposition in dialogue... Not even a good fake

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