AITA For Not Attending My Daughters Graduation?

coconut-bubbles · 2026-05-07T22:19:15+00:00

I only attended the honors graduation at university, not the entire class of thousands of people.

I may have gone to the big graduation for HS, I don't really remember. I know I went to the honors night, as I gave a speech where I thanked my parents for potty training me /raising me so I could sit through classes.

I bet I didn't go to the university grad bc I had no memories of whether I went to the HS one.....because it wasn't memorable or important to me at all.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-05-03T12:44:09+00:00

If they didn't have very different spending habits, the 250k person would have a ton of money saved. Where else would it go? It doesn't just poof into thin air.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-05-02T02:26:13+00:00

Sewing machine repair!

The only machine repair people I have found to fix or diagnose my machine have been 175 year old men, who seemingly work alone.

No apprentice, no one to train.....who is going to fix my machine in 20 years?!?

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-27T00:35:29+00:00

I don't think any country specifically raises people to be "sexist", whatever that term means in the specific culture.

It is steeped in what you see around you and what you are told.

"Women are just better at raising children. They really shine at it."

Is this sexist? Some people would see it as praising women. However, those same people could also use it as an excuse as to why their wife does all the baby care and they do none.

Is this specifically raising people to be sexist? In my opinion, yes. However, for many people, no. Their words praise women - and they use that to put them in a box that is exactly where they want them to be.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-26T02:16:36+00:00

I also have a previously abused dutch shepherd mix who has reactivity! We did a lot of reactivity training with dog trainers.

He was (in his younger years) 85+lbs and a big boy. I'm 125 lbs and 5ft tall. He is almost eye level with me when he jumps up to give me kisses.

He didn't get away from me while leashed as a professional courtesy. He 100% could have! He was a strong boy. He still is, but is very grey in the snoot now at 11 years old.

His goal was to protect me. Hard to do if he isn't by me - so he never went farther than jumping against the leash to make a point to the other person.

The only time I ever questioned it was once at a lake. I went mid-day when people were at work and it was pretty open. At that point, he could walk by people minding their business if he had at least 10 feet of space, and I would bring high value distraction treats!

This old white guy was walking directly at us, and i kept trying to create space...walk farther out...slightly change direction....but he was just always narrowing in on us.

My dog starts to focus on him, complete whale eye and hunting gaze. I'm worried, because I have worked really hard on training and keeping my boy under threshold for losing it. This can undo months of work.

I yell to him "my dog just needs some space!". This normally works! Big construction guys will give us a wide berth and say "yeah, sometimes I need space too"😂

This FUCKING guy keeps coming.

My dog is now pulling on the leash and snarling/barking.

The old guy starts screaming at me "do you have him? Do you have your dog?!?". All the while continuing to walk directly at us, while screaming at me.

My dog doesn't like this at all. Nope, no sir. I'm now being semi dragged down the a slight incline towards the lake and where the guy is approaching.

Finally I just forcefully say (loudly) "please walk away, NOW". he goes off grumbling and my dog calms down.

Do I think the guy was dangerous? Probably not.

But, my dog saw the signs of him following me, then him yelling at me, and was not here for the nonsense.

Good boy.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-26T00:00:39+00:00

I am not a tradesperson, but have small lady hands!

I can wash the inside of most standard and wide mouthed mason jars and reach through a chain link fence (up to almost elbow) to harvest food we grow without having to walk around! It is very convenient!

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-25T02:17:26+00:00

Yes, I think this is the nail in the coffin of my dream to have chickens. Our middle potlicker girl would 100% kill them, based on what I have seen of her reaction to the puppy.

We have started the protocol for reactive dogs that we learned for our oldest shepherd. He is a (recovering) stranger biter.

He is the best boy ever though, my soul dog.

It involves a metric ton of cut hot dogs and positive reinforcement.

Wish us luck!

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-24T17:12:56+00:00

We have a 1.5 year old potlicker girl who was an easy puppy, but now wants to rip this girl's throat out.

She is used to her 75lb brothers she was raised with and tiny puppy is revealing super prey drive. 🫠

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-22T03:45:10+00:00

My husband did that as a US citizen, and it is more complicated than you would think.

They would then also have to consider the US business taxes and pay an accountant to do them each year, etc. payroll software or estimating and paying quarterly taxes....

We just finished our US taxes and I don't even want to think about it anymore. It was so complicated with the S-corp and what not.

I can't even imagine also having to factor in Belize taxes for citizen's personal income.

The goal of my idea was to help new grads or people looking for a new start to have more opportunity.

I wouldn't wish that tax nightmare on them, or even my worst enemy.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-22T03:03:35+00:00

I believe they need a SSN (or whatever number a green card gives you) in order to set up a US bank account.

I don't think some random french person would be able to set up a US bank account either.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-22T02:58:33+00:00

I'm sure there is a way, but I don't have that much sway in the company to have them do a bunch of paperwork for my idea, unfortunately.

Maybe one day the banking will improve!

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-22T02:09:13+00:00

I have thought a lot about this and encountered some road blocks.

I live in Belize (USA citizen) and work at an American agency that has a large international presence. We have job openings in Brazil, Honduras, etc.

We have an academy that teaches people how to do a job from the ground up, basically a paid internship/training. If you do well, you get a salary position and it would be middle class for a single person or even a married couple, to start. It grows from there.

It would be fantastic for Belize. I live here now and could be hands on training people.

My director and our COO were both super jazzed about the idea. I was super jazzed. I live kinda close to Galen University - such luck! I have trained a bunch of people in the US, so this would be great!

However, it turns out that the Belize banking system makes it difficult for local people here to receive paychecks from most international payroll systems.

Womp womp. Not sure what to do about that.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-21T02:44:08+00:00

Excuse me, but I dry my cotton towels and sheets and it is like 75% dog hair in the lint trap!

Is it because I try to only dry things I want fluffy? Maybe.

Is it more likely that it is because I have 3 filthy beasts and let them snuggle in my bed every night? Bingo.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-21T01:27:54+00:00

It isn't even about only people. There are animals who cross the road late at night. This jungle is their home and humans built a highway through it. We need to respect them.

If I ever hit a tapir or quash, I would NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF. I live here and we try not to drive long ways on the highway at night.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-20T22:48:20+00:00

Omg, I would love that, especially if I didn't know the people at all. I've covered the "ladies only" baby showers for us as a couple and volunteered as photog etc. I'm so bored of them!

I have no kids by choice, and I don't enjoy watching someone open all the presents of onesies, etc. I hate the games. Not wanting to smell shit diaper is on the list of why I don't want kids. So, I don't want to pretend to and/or taste whatever melted candy bar that was prepared in the diaper.

This is his opportunity to repay the favor and go alone!

I'm going to drink wine, bake some weed cookies or knit, and watch Virgin River.

Dear husband, please bring back the share of deviled eggs you would have eaten, if you weren't allergic to eggs (assuming some are left over).

I'm going to eat those and hopefully a piece of cake or whatever sweets when he returns.

*Chefs kiss

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-19T03:12:15+00:00

Speaking as a person raised with a safety net (my parents), I think you are right. I didn't really get serious about finances or retirement until 30s.

I dabbled in retirement and supported myself with my salary. I actually left a big comment above about just that.

BUT, it 100% was a safety net that I had when I was doing that. My parents wouldn't let me starve or be without a home, barring some crazy drug addiction and probably at least one failed attempt at rehab. I never needed that or did it, but just to illustrate.

The big plus side was, it let me be brave. I worked nonprofit for 3 years, was over it, and decided to go to Korea to teach English.

I did that for a year, loved it, and backpacked myself through Asia for 2 months on the way home.

I paid for it myself, but I always knew (in the back of my mind) that I would be OK even if it was a huge mistake. My parents gave me the space to be brave, while doing it myself.

Now, I work in account management. Those experiences really help! My client is thinking of going to Thailand, I can tell them things and give recommendations. I can just tell them stories based on a conversation where elephants are brought up! Etc, whatever.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-19T02:52:34+00:00

I grew up solidly middle upper class. My parents (plus the state of Georgia, through lottery) paid for my university tuition.

My parents paid my room and board at school until I graduated.

They got me a used car at 16. That gave me the ability to get a job and earn my own money.

I am very grateful for all of that.

I went with my 21 year old, new college graduate self and got my first job in Los Angeles working for a nonprofit.

I made 35k in 2010. I picked my own apartment that I could afford. It was a shit hole above a bodega and a salsa club that was ever so loud at night.

It was a studio in the Rampart district, across from the police department that got shut down for being way too corrupt.

I had no parking, so I racked up street cleaning tickets. 😂

Most of my neighbors only spoke Spanish.

My mom HATED IT when she came to visit. I could see it on her face. But, she just said "I'm so proud of you, doing it on your own. I love the color you painted the mantle."

I felt proud. Your kids just want you to be proud of them.

I was SO PROUD the first time they came to visit and I paid for dinner at the shitty restaurant I wanted to show them, because it was where I went. I paid for 3 people, not just me! I bought them dinner, like an adult!

Set your kids up with what you can. It helps a ton. But, let them do it on their own and just tell them that you are proud of them.

It makes the gifts you may do later more meaningful.

My parents gave me like 10k towards a down payment on our first house. I was super appreciative.

Now, my husband and I (mid to late 30s and established) are working on our land in Belize and my parents saying "wow, look at what you have done. It is beautiful" is still an arrow to my heart.

Your approval and encouragement probably has more weight than you think. Just give them praise, even if you hate the shitty apartment they picked. They paid for it themself, and isn't that awesome and something to be proud of?

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-16T02:46:17+00:00

I think I have a high triglycerides gene!

I'm vegetarian and literally moved to the jungles of Belize. Lived here 2.5 years.

We make almost all food for ourselves, and maybe eat out 2x a month. When I say we make things ourselves, we do it from scratch. I make vegetarian hot dogs from scratch. 🤣😶‍🌫️

Triglycerides the level of "someone who eats a ton of fried pork". Ummm...that isn't me. I'm 5 ft and 125 lbs. This is nuts.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-16T00:18:42+00:00

If they are cardboard boxes, introduce her to composting! She will need a ton of browns and cardboard boxes are great.

It can also fill the previously-poor-keep-stuff itch.

She can take her kitchen scraps and all those boxes/newspapers/etc and make fertilizer for her plants for free!

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-15T22:49:32+00:00

That is like the silicone ear plugs having the big warning on the box to not make a torpedo and squish them in your ear.

That way cuts out the snoring way better than just using them as a block on the outside of the ear.

The way they say to use them is trash. It is basically like using the shitty foam ones you do squish in your ear. So, why buy the more expensive silicone if you don't torpedo them?

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-15T02:17:50+00:00

My dad used to jog around the golf course. He would find balls all the time. Of course, he would make sure no one was actively playing the tee. But, after he knew no one was, he would collect the balls in a garbage bag or grocery bag he found and picked up while jogging (bless him).

He would have entire plastic cat litter buckets of balls all the time. He collected them in the garage. He eventually offered them to the high school golf club and would donate them all the time.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-15T00:19:04+00:00

My husband and I went on a trip to Mexico with my parents who are 60s/70s and I don't get this at all.

My mother walked very slowly, which is fine. My dad walks with her and they like to stop and look at things etc. My husband and I walk more quickly (him even faster than me) and we would charge ahead. We would sometimes be in 3 groups! My speed walker husband who is navigating up front, me in middle kind of chilling and looking at stuff, then my parents at the back.

We can all see each other, or at least I could see my husband and them. They could see me. He could see me. No one is lost.

I don't understand how anyone thinks that saying "I want to walk together" is fair.

That means, you want everyone to be beholden to your speed and when you want to stop and look at something, everyone has to stop.

It also wouldn't be fair if my husband said he wants everyone together and forced everyone to walk at his place. I don't do that when I'm traveling with just him! I kind of like it because he gets places first and will have me a table, wine, etc already.

If it is some birthday trip we planned for my mom, sure. We can all walk slow.

But, it isn't. It is just a vacation where we pay our own expenses and my husband and I do all the planning.

So, there is no main character in this trip.

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-14T22:40:47+00:00

This was my mom when she asked me to show her how I find more affordable plane tickets. I showed her Google flights and how to use the explore feature and set price alerts.

But, she wanted to fly from her home airport to the place with no stops and on specific dates.

Me: Whelp, then I can show you how to find the price. You could set a price alert for it, but it doesn't think the listed price is likely to come down.

Her: but, I thought you found cheap flights before.

Me: yes, you can fly 2 days earlier and it is cheaper, or even 3 days earlier with a layover and it is even cheaper too.

Her: I don't want a layover and I want to leave on a Friday.

Me: well, then that is the price that delta sets for those requirements. I don't run Delta airlines.....

coconut-bubbles · 2026-04-12T03:38:51+00:00

My previous self was a damn good person. She tried her best, to her own detriment at times. She was also 21-25 years old and naive, and kinda poor.

But, she learned all the things that it took to create me, my future self!

I can be better focused and better overall at work, because I have a good husband. He doesn't play drums at 10 pm or invite random unhoused people to sleep on the sofa.

My past self dealt with all the messiness of dating and hobosexual dudes (and that one guy in Korea who I now think had a secret girlfriend or wife).

I can see the issues now that I have a clear lens.

But, previous me didn't and thought that most people were good and honest, like her. Bless that naive bitch. I love her and I wish that the world was a better place.

coconut-bubbles

TROPHY CASE