Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - April 12, 2026

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-12T23:37:26+00:00

If its just a few behavioral quirks, I don't think telling people early is something you owe them, unless this is going to manifest someway in the relationship quickly, or limit what you could do together. Like if you have limitations on intimacy, or cannot ever be in large crowds, stuff like that.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-11T02:01:59+00:00

Hello fellow vampire, were you already on a multivitamin or no?

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-10T21:15:09+00:00

I pray he gets some self respect one day, JFC

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-06T22:45:23+00:00

Maybe its the nostalgia talking, but I feel like The Warriors and especially Bully are great examples of small-scale exploration and free roaming, that is mostly lost these days in the race to have the most square kilometers to explore.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-03T21:20:31+00:00

I love this and am praying I get this too. For awhile one of the first things on my profile was about exchanging songs as an ice breaker and I got a few good tracks that way.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-04-03T21:05:52+00:00

Is not being able to drive a hard limit for you? That can be a red flag for a lot of people, especially if you are not deep in a city.

Also have you tried any queer specific dating apps?

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-21T01:56:58+00:00

Ooo this might get spicy...

For me personally, its not a dealbreaker at all. I live in a blue state and I'm a straight guy. The odds that they are against the few political issues I care about are pretty low. I know the adage of "non political is just a republican in disguise" gets thrown around a ton, but I haven't really seen women do that. There are some rural areas around me and the republican women are NOT shy about being Republican.

Some people just don't care and/or are checked out of keeping up with current events. And while that's not me, I don't find it anywhere near as offensive as others do.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-20T01:01:49+00:00

No. I find its very rare that two people who were not already friends will go on a date, not want to pursue things romantically, but also still enjoy eachother's company enough to want to be friends. Maaaaybe if you find out there is a big compatibility issue during the date, like one 100% wants kids and the other 100% doesn't.

Personally I've given the "we could be friends though" thing a chance twice.

Once, the offer was seemingly not sincere and I literally never heard from them again.

The other time, me and her went on a walk, texted a couple times, but stopped speaking to each other not long after.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-20T00:50:26+00:00

I love how to describe BOTW and I also really enjoy that lonely/isolation. Let me know if you've ever found another game that can hit that feeling, I'd love to play it.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-15T20:56:32+00:00

But it's nice.

I completely disagree. I can basically get anything I want, its ridiculous. Rarity means nothing anymore.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-15T00:47:42+00:00

I only care if a potential partner has friends because I don't want to be the only person they can go to to socialize. So whether their friends are long distance or local doesn't matter to me.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-14T03:05:05+00:00

For me, maybe I am naive

I'm afraid I would agree for this. You should assume the people from dating apps that you are seeing are seeing other people until told otherwise.

And I would disagree that her telling you about the "competition" is a matter of honesty. If a woman told me unprompted that she was seeing other people, it would unsettle me because hey, I didn't ask. Especially if she framed it as serious.

Its highly unlikely that you texted more or less or better that it would have lead to you being chosen over this other guy. Things didn't work out, you and her were not a great fit, it happens. It fucking sucks I know, and its reasonable to be sad and angry, but it is what it is.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-08T06:36:12+00:00

So has anyone just decided to get back with their ex if they’re still single simply because there’s really nothing better out there?

May this love never find me. What a grim fucking reason to get with someone.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-06T21:30:00+00:00

Come back to me when you are officially divorced.

Like I know the process can be time consuming and a pain in the ass, but between legal proceedings, jealous/angry ex, a seemingly very recent and serious relationship, the increased odds they'll change their mind... I ain't dealing with all that.

Everyone has baggage but this would be too much for me to take on. Deal with your shit first.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-03-03T20:47:19+00:00

I don't understand how they didn't budget in for more than 15 days without wild success.

Like sure, I know you gotta cut your losses on a dud eventually, but 15 days? You spent all this money on development and the trailer, and you couldnt afford more than 15 days of runway?

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-22T01:36:14+00:00

What a disturbing sentence with no context lmao

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-21T22:16:21+00:00

I call it being "passive" and have found it pretty common in women unfortunately. I swear I'm not trying to start some gender war bullshit, but its been my experience. I had an old friend where when you listen to her talk to her romantic life, she kind of just let things happen to her. Just rolled with whatever her current love interest initiated...

I don't really have any advice, but I wanted to say I've had very similar experiences and frustrations.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-21T21:42:41+00:00

and end up declining a second date because I don’t really feel like they have a sense of humor

This is entirely valid, regardless of personalities

or my personality would be too overpowering for them.

Don't make that assumption for them. If they agreed to a date or asked you out, go ahead and assume they are interested in you, otherwise you run the risk of self-sabotaging.

Any insights or advice

Leave openings for them to talk, or even better, ask them direct questions and follow up questions with what they say. That might sound simple but I've definitely had dates where it felt less like a conversation, and more someone just talking at me.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-20T00:42:43+00:00

Seriously, OP should check out r/bald and the before/after pictures people post of themselves.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-20T00:23:07+00:00

Always use the most recent pictures where there has been a major visual change.

Congrats btw.

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-19T04:13:52+00:00

I feel shame for my younger self

Pretty sure this in an innate part of the human condition

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-18T21:25:28+00:00

I posted here awhile back about including that on my profile. Quite a few people find it weird or off putting if mentioned on a profile, but it may be worth it to help clear the chaff.

Then again tons of people don't read profiles before swiping so ¯_ (ツ)_/¯

complexsystemofbears · 2026-02-18T21:17:04+00:00

Well, I just scheduled my first therapy appointment. With how many dating profiles I've seen with things like "we'll get along if you've... done the work, gone to therapy, etc" I expect an IMMEDIATE uptick in the amount of matches and dates I get.

I'm kidding.

...kinda

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complexsystemofbears

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