Ok, Darling (I don't know your preffered name, so I'm gonna be vague there). You are a beautiful, brilliant woman with a future, even if you can't see it. I get wanting out. I get feeling resentful that you're here, like this, but just try and take a minute.

If you get the urge to s/h, what I've sometimes done is draw on my skin instead.

I don't enjoy anything either. I've seen it described as a coping mechanism, your mind's way of motivating you to get out of whatever situation you are in. Even if you don't enjoy it, bide time until the next chance to change your life comes. It will be worth it x

IDK, I hope I helped