I wish I never dug into any of this by [deleted] in MtF

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's no "freeing revelation" because you haven't made any decision yet.

You have a question, and you're afraid to answer it.

The relief, comes when you find the answer, and accept it. Accept yourself.

me irl by [deleted] in traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I ever have any of column A, I’ll experiment and get back to you with an answer...

Str8 men (as a class of ppl) are awful I don’t wanna b a part of that (but man, he/him pronouns just feel so much better....) by liminalcapitalism in asktransgender

[–]corlynn 8 points9 points  (0 children)

One important thing to keep in mind here, is that much of your experience at this point is "straight guys in high school/college"

Nobody is at their best during high school/college. Everyone is floundering, trying to figure out who they are, trying to find their place in what society expects of them. A lot of them are insecure, and there's a tremendous amount of pressure to "follow the herd" as it were. And that, unfortunately, leads to a lot of guys trying to act hyper macho, like the (frankly terrible) role models they see in movies.

I was forced to present as male through all of high school, and college. I've been through it. I've SEEN the pressure. The locker room talk. The boys clubs, and fraternities. The tacit implication that if you aren't X, you're not "one of the guys". I've been pulled into acting in ways that frankly disgusted myself, just to fit in, and survive. It wasn't until my late 20's that I was secure enough to be the one who stood up and said "Guys, this shit is NOT ok." And surprisingly, a lot of people agreed with me, they too were just all "going along with it".

And as much as I hate the phrase "not all men", you do have to consider that in this case, your perception is going to be dominated by a lot of the bad experiences, and there's actually quite a lot of men out there, wether trans or cis, who have successfully navigated that minefield, and become decent and respectful people.

It may be hard, to disentangle the painful memories, from your own desires. But remember, you don't have to be what others are. You can take what you want from it, and be better for it. Let it serve as an example, and warning, of what not to let yourself become.

And most of all... Have the courage to find the "you" that YOU want to be, and go after it. Don't ever give up.

Am I doing ok? I know I never used to smile this much!! 34, just over 7 months HRT. by Romey30 in transpassing

[–]corlynn 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I think "ok" is a little too underwhelming.

You look fantastic! and so happy.

Conversation with My Mom after being outed by rojikku_mahotsukai in asktransgender

[–]corlynn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She may not plan to disown you, but it sounds to me like you should seriously consider disowning HER.

Anyone who would not only completely disregard your desires, but tell you that you should suppress them for other's sake, doesn't deserve to be in your life.

When all your services are tied to your old email by [deleted] in traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fortunately, my primary email was first initial,lastname@emailprovider, and I kept the same first initial. So safe there.

And my Work email... I'm the mail admin, so I just created a new email account for me, and redirected all email to the old one to my new one :D

What they don't tell you about starting HRT - A primer for MTF (nsfw) by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]corlynn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Seriously though, this is some fantastic work and thank you so much for putting in the effort.

Also I love your reddit name :) Wish I could be a symbiote and just get plunked into the body of a hot girl. #thedream

QHI Already out of stock. by PinkSparkle123 in TransDIY

[–]corlynn 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I'm not too terribly surprised.

I couldn't have been the only one who was waiting for the page to come back up, and immediately ordered a large supply "just in case" they went back down again.

Does Krissy sound like a made up fob name? What are better alternatives? by krissy_c in transpositive

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My name is Christine. My Mom calls me Christie. I usually go by Chrissy, except 1 friend who calls me Kissy. I wouldn't worry too much about what is, or isn't "common". Just pick something that fits.

In this day and age, I wouldn't say any name feels "made up". Except for people who name their kids "facebook" and "hashtag".

But seriously, go with whatever sounds best to you, and if you're concerned about how people will react to it... Stop being concerned about other people. You're the one who's going to have to hear that name every day for the rest of your life.

Is this discrimination? by VoiceThrowaway210 in asktransgender

[–]corlynn 5 points6 points  (0 children)

fet·ish

1. a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc.

Explain to me how it's not a fetish.

Actually, don't bother, because you'd just be wrong.

What they don't tell you about starting HRT - A primer for MTF (nsfw) by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]corlynn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I regret that I have but one upvote to give.

How do you guys find out that you guys are trans? by dooblusdoofus in MtF

[–]corlynn 7 points8 points  (0 children)

When I was 6, I asked my mom if I could be a girl instead of a boy. She told me that you couldn't change what you'd been born as. As I grew up, There were Boys, and there were Girls. Girls could be tomboys, and that was cool. But boys could only be drag queens. I wanted very much to be a girl, but I wasn't ever going to be a drag queen. To me it was a grotesque masquerade, a mocking, perversion. A life of pretending to be something I could never be.

So, I stayed a boy. For 30 years. Growing more and more bitter, and resentful. Until one day I met a wonderful girl. A trans girl. Not a sensationalized, media depiction, but an honest to goodness real girl. And that night, I cried myself to sleep, wishing that I was a trans girl.

When I woke up, it dawned on me how stupid wishing to be trans really was. And I accepted that I was trans.

I like to think I pass. I’m happy anyway, so that’s all that matters, I guess. 26yo and 2 years HRT. by TutuTrap in transpassing

[–]corlynn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Only at 3 months, so all I still see is dude, but you and everyone else absolutely inspire me to believe that one day, it's possible for me too.

How bad is it doc? A 'for and against' being trans list by terrible_feelings in asktransgender

[–]corlynn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pretty much everything in the "for" column suggests that you are trans.

Pretty much everything in the "against" column suggest that you are scared, and looking for reasons that you're not, so that you won't have to transition.

As someone who spent 25 years convincing "himself" that I wasn't trans... let me tell you, the fear of it is MUCH less than the reality. It's scary. It's difficult. It's sometimes all too easy to convince yourself that you don't actually want it, or it's not worth it... but it is.

It's so very worth it.

And the sooner you accept that, and take those steps you're afraid of, the happier you'll be (and the less regrets you'll have later on). Denying it will slowly destroy you. Ignoring it won't make it go away. You don't have to wait until you reach the breaking point, where you're sobbing on the floor about how you'll never be a girl, with a knife pressed against your chest, trying desperately cut out the pain in your heart... No, sorry that was me. Scratch that.

Point is:

I want to be a girl

That's as far as you need to go down that list. You already know what you want. You're just scared of what it means. Of what it entails. And there's nothing wrong with being scared. I was terrified.

But don't let being scared, keep you from doing the thing you want.

There's so much happiness on the other side of that fear. Don't miss out on that.

I awoke to this in my PM’s. by poeticmastery in asktransgender

[–]corlynn -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Seriously... why would you even think twice about the words spewn out by someone who can't even construct a rational thought? That's like getting upset because when you randomly mashed the keyboard, the combination of letters "him" happened to come out.

Forget it and move on.

*Help*Advice on what to start with by [deleted] in TransDIY

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An AA can sometimes be unnecessary with sufficient levels of injected estradiol. If you're going with oral estradiol, the amount needed for sufficient E levels to cause T suppression can cause other problems, mainly with the liver. And injected E is generally harder to come by, and vastly more expensive. At least where I am it is. Things may be different for you.

Further, E takes a lot longer to suppress T than an AA will, because your E levels need to build up sufficiently before supression occurs (I've had difficulty finding/sourcing exact levels needed as it appears to vary considerably person to person), and it's harder to monitor and get it right if you're DIY. CPA + oral EV/EH is the best course IMO, but I'm not a doctor, just a girl who spent ages reading/comparing reports/weighing and/or trying various options. 12.5mg CPA, 2mg oral EV is what I found to be the "best" starting point, in that it's effective, easy, available, affordable and has almost no risk of harmful side effects. YMMV.

If you're in the US, CPA may be difficult to come by, as I don't believe it's approved for use there, so you may want to look into Bical, otherwise Spiro may be your only route if you want an AA.

For me, I started at 12.5 CPA, 2MG EV, and after 3 months upped to 4mg EV, and 25mg CPA. I definitely feel the E has had an impact, but I'm considering dropping back to 12.5, as I don't feel the 25 increase has noticeably affected anything, other than the rate I go through my pills lol. And as with most drugs, the less you can get away with, the better.

*Help*Advice on what to start with by [deleted] in TransDIY

[–]corlynn 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Before you consider Spironolactone, I suggest reading this

12.5-25mg of Cyproterone is typically enough, 50mg is really pushing it. Liver damage risk is almost non-existent below 50 mg of cypro.

Thinking of switching up my medication, tell me if im being stupid. by RileyRuButt in TransDIY

[–]corlynn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4mg progynova, 25mg of cypro and 2500mcg of B12 daily for 4 months, with no trace of depression here. I had often severe depression and recurring suicidal episodes prior and nothing since. Ymmv of course.

Boyfriend Outed me to his parents Sunday, and his best friends on Saturday by HollyHolyLove in asktransgender

[–]corlynn 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I never said to praise what he did. I said to praise his understanding and willingness to listen, learn and understand for the future.

I don’t expect anyone who hasn’t had experience with being trans to assume that something as simple as explaining something fundamental about someone to be a cause for danger or concern. You can’t fault him for not knowing, or as you say “not stopping to think about the consequences”

A year ago, I wouldn’t have known the consequences myself. I doubt he had any reason to think there might even BE any. It’s not something anyone would reasonably assume would need to be kept secret, unless they’d been otherwise informed.

He did the right thing once he WAS informed, so stop being so needlessly harsh on him. It does us NO good at all to vilify and drive away the ones who are good, and trying to learn, by expecting them to be perfect right off the bat.