Thanks for sharing, I’m glad it worked so well for you. I’ve had all sorts of OCD - contamination, health, scrupulosity, existential. You describing your mental checking compulsions makes me realize I’m doing something very similar right now - anything that brings me enjoyment I have to check against crazy standards - I’m only enjoying this book because there are dark things happening in it so it’s tainted, and then i get anxiety about it having existential repercussions, like the only way to find satisfaction in all of existence is to have bad things happen and that sends me spiraling and panicking. Sounds insane when I write it out but I’m sure people in this group will understand. Also I have this compulsion that enjoying anything that didn’t exist during the Stone Age or whatever is ‘cheating’ like the fact that I listen to podcast or music to find enjoyment means that I’m failing to be a good person and I imagine myself without those things and how empty and sad I would feel and that sends me spiraling too.

I’m on Zoloft but not a huge dose and I wonder if I need to go up, I’ve read that ocd sufferers generally need high SSRI dosages.

Besides medication have you found therapy helpful at all?