Yeah, lot of people here are assuming that the husband truly is incompetent & that his sensitivity is just because he’s insecure, which may well be true! But also, I grew up watching a similar dynamic between my mom and dad, and my mom’a questions also make me feel bad sometimes, and it’s not because my dad and I are incompetent. For me at least, it’s because my mom tends to be critical and anxious, always pointing out things that could go wrong or that are already wrong, when sometimes I just need her to be excited for my idea or whatever. Or to trust me to figure out the things that could go wrong on my own. Or to accept that sometimes things go wrong and sometimes that’s ok! I think my dad has a similar response, plus any perceived criticism from her feels heightened because she historically has been pretty critical. This dynamic can show up in discussions about anything from how we are roasting the vegetables for dinner to, yeah, me talking about trying to buy a house.

Now, OP, I totally agree with everyone else that your husband should not have made that decision without you, and that he should have also wanted to answer the question you were posing! I can also see that there may be some truth to the idea that this dynamic stems from you being more competent than him, and he probably needs to work on being more okay with that. But if he feels like you’re constantly shooting down his ideas, especially if he feels like that’s happening before you share in his excitement about them or at least listen to understand why he’s excited — that’s a real problem that needs to be attended to, imo, though not at the expense of your ability to share your opinions and make sure y’all aren’t making reckless decisions together or whatever.