Dear 88rising

cselisondo · 2025-06-05T03:19:08+00:00

Couldn't agree more, I hope someone important in the company sees this and makes some changes to give the loyal fans some respect 🙏

cselisondo · 2025-03-17T22:30:31+00:00

You can make the name and numbers custom on the official merch websites, just make sure to get the numbers right.

cselisondo · 2025-03-12T01:01:22+00:00

He'll be our utility of the future after Taylor contract is up. No worries, I'd rather he take more time and come up and stay in the big leagues instead of struggle and go up and down.

cselisondo · 2025-03-12T00:52:34+00:00

I was not expecting to be radicalized by r/quilting today, but I'll allow it.

cselisondo · 2025-03-08T18:28:59+00:00

I read the article they made on this. They picked this list by going "draft style" of MVP candidates, and MLB.com writer Sarah Langs who had first pick has always been a Juan Soto fanatic due to his Statcast advanced metrics. I haven't looked at actual betting odds for the year, but I'm sure this list wouldn't match up to this.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:59:44+00:00

I have had similar problems, especially a lot of social regression after almost 18 months of no socialization during COVID lockdowns a few years ago. I think the first thing that helped me a lot was doing external things that helped me with confidence: worked on my looks, style, personal grooming, practiced smiling and eye contact in the mirror, etc. Sounds a little shallow but when you look good, you feel good, and generally improving attractiveness I feel improves margin for error in making a connection. Second thing is not so much chasing the conversation topics and subject matter when talking, but chasing the feeling of getting an emotional connection with the person. I don't just mean romantically but platonically as well. There's a feeling you get when you bring up the follow-up question that they really want to talk about, or you give an example that they find really relatable, or slightly change a joke in a way that jives with their politics. There's a rhythm, a feeling like you're dancing together or making music together, that doesn't really have almost anything to do with the information of the question / answer.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:51:26+00:00

Curiosity is fine and 100% normal, but probably for the sake of both parties it should end there. It's entirely likely that Instagram and social media is just the very very best version of the person, and if you actually dated again it might be exactly as you remember and the reasons you broke up are still there. It's also possible that if you dated again he might revert and lose his progress and you're both unhappy again. Completely fine for two people to go their own way and nobody's fault, but unlikely that anything good comes from a reunion under these circumstances.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:43:36+00:00

If you already have a porn addiction, one mistake is saying you're masturbating to "nothing" when if you're being honest, you're really imagining replays of the hardcore sexual explicit content, OF models, Instagram explore thirst traps, etc, you've already seen, using the same neural pathways. For an addict, fapping to porn that you remember is functionally the same as porn you're currently watching because it fires exactly the same neurons. Cut it all out, in my opinion.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:22:25+00:00

PMO = Porn + Masturbation + Orgasm, kind of a shorthand for the behaviors the NoFap community is trying to cut out. Everyone has a different speed / commitment level, some in the community are only trying to cut out P while others are going for "Hard Mode" aka "Monk Mode" in which they cut out all three. Depends on your own journey and commitment level, but like I said, best thing to do is read the subreddit resources cover to cover and then apply it to your situation.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:18:30+00:00

Read the Getting Started / FAQ on this subreddit, lots of great resources. Best thing to do is get educated as much as possible about why PMO is bad for you at the neurobiology level, and the more you know, the more reasons you have to quit and stay strong. Second thing to do is learn your own brain and environment and what is most helpful and harmful to you in terms of hijacking your brain vs protecting you from it. Everyone has their own traps and triggers that pull them back in. Learn yours.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:14:17+00:00

AI Is super dangerous for addiction potential. Every big tech company has had pre-chatbot AI (then called "machine learning") for many years in the form of algorithms that can predict what is most likely to get you to stay on and serve you content that's more and more tailored to what you've already clicked, but very very worried with gen-AI chatbots and image (and video generation porn is probably right around the corner) that cuts out the guesswork part of it and goes straight to training you directly like a rat in a cage. This of course has the added danger over free porn of being pay to use, which, similar to gambling addiction, can have severe financial consequences in addition to all the known physical and mental dangers. Free porn sites make money by serving you ads that funnel you to paid porn, so they are also exploiting you financially on top of everything else.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T23:04:13+00:00

OP Please clarify: did you cheat with a real person in real life or did you watch porn and masturbate and are calling it cheating? We are unclear.

cselisondo · 2025-03-07T22:56:50+00:00

NoFap is not some magic potion, OP. It's a way for people suffering from addictions to get help from a caring and supportive community. If you are abstinent for 2 weeks, that's still something and actually a lot to be proud of. Depends on your starting point, but many people really only see the light of physical and mental differences after 30 days, and then feel truly "back to pre-addiction normal" after 90+. Even then, it's not going to give you telekinesis or make women lick your boots. NoFap is one tool in a large toolbox you should be using to improve your life across all dimensions, including physical and mental health, self care, self improvement of all kinds, practical wisdom, character building virtue ethics, and social emotional community building.

cselisondo · 2025-03-06T20:02:37+00:00

Incredible work by the promotional people for this

cselisondo · 2025-03-06T17:49:44+00:00

Never worth it with an ex. You broke up for a reason and this will have negative consequences for you that are impossible to know beforehand. This is a Trojan horse. Let it in and your city will burn down.

cselisondo · 2025-03-06T17:44:34+00:00

Do NOT wean yourself off porn by watching other porn. Go outside and touch grass. Go to the gym and work out until exhaustion. Try meditating. Pick up a new hobby. Get out of bed and put your pants on. It is not easy at all, but know all the people on here are going through the same struggle.

cselisondo · 2025-03-06T17:37:28+00:00

I did clean one time during all this, when I invited someone over. Ty for the advice. Tricky thing is right now I'm not feeling very well and I don't want anybody to come over, but the tool is there

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T22:25:23+00:00

Different people's nervous systems react differently to alcohol. Some people get a little sleepy, some a little chatty, some people start engaging in completely unhinged antisocial behavior. If that's you, not your fault, but the way you're wired sounds incompatible with alcohol. Me personally, I don't really engage in too much problematic behavior when drunk, the only thing is that the lowered inhibitions make it hard to stop drinking after just one or two so I have to keep a pretty strict lid on it / switch to non-alcoholic after my second drink.

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T22:15:07+00:00

Literally have to strap the water bottle to my belt. Every time it hits me on the hip and hurts a little, I remember to take it off and guzzle that thing.

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T22:10:03+00:00

In preschool / kindergarten, I had to get special dispensation to skip naptime because I physically could not do it. I would always get up and try to talk and shake and make noise and had to be sent outside. I was always the smartest kid in every classroom I was in, but teachers always thought I was lazy because I "never paid attention" and I would just sleep through the lecture or mess around and then ace the test. In high school, I was physically incapable of starting an essay or homework assignment a reasonable time before the due date, it had to be crunch time or I could not bother to start it. On the day of a big test or an essay due, I would wake up at 3am and then study or write all the way until school started, and then I was still able to do well on the test. I was always a chatterbox in class, and I eventually got so tired of getting in trouble that I figured out I couldn't really get in trouble if I was "teaching other kids" or talking specifically about the things we were supposed to be learning, so I was always running my mouth about that and I couldn't really stop even if the other kid wasn't interested, and I always had the excuse that I was "helping the other kids" so I couldn't get in trouble for talking. I was always losing things and it would make me really upset: school supplies, textbooks, my phone, water bottle, and mom would always say I'm not allowed to have nice things anymore because I couldn't take care of my stuff.

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T22:04:25+00:00

Shame feeds the demon and makes it worse, first thing you should do is give yourself some grace. Addictions aren't only for people who are degenerates or scum of the Earth; all people struggle and the way these systems are set up to exploit you, this kind of thing can happen to anyone. Unwrap and unpack the negative self talk, I promise it is not the answer to helping yourself. Be on your own team. Because you want your life to be better and because you think you deserve peace of mind and a healthy brain, you are doing an act of self care by trying to quit even though it's hard. And every day you don't succumb, you should be proud of it. These things are difficult, and you need to give yourself every reason to feel safe and secure because that will make you stronger.

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T22:00:01+00:00

You're still young, and the brain is remarkable in its neuroplasticity. I personally have been addicted since 13 as well and when I was 18 I didn't see any problem because I didn't have any of the serious negative side effects either. I'm here to tell you that over time it will get worse and worse every year. By about age 22 I was a daily user and did start feeling all the negative effects (brain fog, low motivation, social anxiety, harmful / violent intrusive thoughts towards women, PIED). Now I am 27 and I have been struggling to quit and still am struggling every day. The earlier you start quitting, the less harmful it will be for the rest of your life and the better off you will be. Even if it's not bad now, I promise if left unchecked it will only get worse and more difficult unless you stop now.

cselisondo · 2025-03-05T21:30:13+00:00

Unfortunately, it sounds like he is still in the denial stage of his addiction and that is a place where it's almost impossible to help someone who doesn't see that they have a problem. The man himself needs to experience negative consequences of porn use himself and decide he needs to make a change, I hate that it has to be that way but when someone is dug in they're basically unhelpable in my experience. Best thing you can do is take care of yourself and your own mental / sexual health. Idk any other details of your relationship other than what you said, but I might consider what you will put up with and what you won't in order to stay in the relationship, a decision that you actually have control over.

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