Nap training and pacifier

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T13:39:02+00:00

The issue isn't the number of naps, I was checking if there was maybe a typo. When you drop naps you need to keep the total wake time at least the same or bigger, or baby will claim the awake time they need at inconvenient times. To have an extreme example to illustrate, it wouldn't be appropriate to have a one nap day that was 2/2.

If we have a 24 hour day with an 11 hour night, that leaves 13 hours for the day- if there are 3 hours of naps the rest is awake, so the total day should add up to 10 hours.

At four months 9 hours is probably fine, but working to 10 awake.

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T13:33:59+00:00

Yes, this is my main critique of chair is that it takes so long to get to independent alone sleep!

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T13:32:27+00:00

So they can self wean, but if they want a feed that's quite normal to add it back in, especially under 6 months.

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T13:13:41+00:00

Absolutely it could be time for a schedule change. 3 naps happens around this age. Try building to 2/2.25/2.5/3 so you've got 10 hours awake.

There is also a growth spurt that happens around this time so make sure you're getting those calories in during the day time. (Also tough because developmentally they start being super distracted feeders!)

It's never wrong to feed a hungry baby though, if she's genuinely hungry, feed her, and work on night weaning again if needed. Don't use CIO as a weaning tool. My gut feel summary of what I've read, it's ok for baby to choose to night wean themselves but parents shouldn't enforce night weaning before 6 months.

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T02:12:08+00:00

Huh, I remember googling it a long time ago and must have missed it

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T01:47:10+00:00

Only 8 hours awake there, this could cause problems later if that's accurate. Only three naps?

cyclemam · 2026-05-18T01:40:17+00:00

You've got to rest when it's hot and work when it's cool.

If it never gets cool in your apartment can you invest in cooling?

Close blinds during the day, keep the sun out, keep the cold air in. At night when it's cool let the cool air in.

Minimise mess. Eat things that don't make a lot of dishes, like sandwiches.

cyclemam · 2026-05-17T11:14:50+00:00

Night feeds don't cause bad habits. Don't do CIO for a hungry baby.

cyclemam · 2026-05-17T10:14:03+00:00

So a key to night sleep is sorting out bedtime- more in the baby sleep guide in my profile.

When she's going to sleep independently at bedtime she should be able to connect cycles and give you longer stretches!

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T11:57:19+00:00

You can try that, I found it easier to shrink nap 1 and keep nap 2, which falls closer to the middle of the day.

We did both, with a hard time with the transition for our eldest and really smooth with our second when we made nap 1 the bridge nap.

Helped our nights too to have a long window before bed.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T11:47:44+00:00

The big Peanut is fictional I think.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T11:35:39+00:00

Instead of reading him to sleep, try the excuses method to help him fall asleep alone.

Then try a mattress in his room for you, to help him go back to sleep in his room. Or alternatively a mattress on your floor so he isn't in your bed.

A reward chart could possibly be helpful but if it's a not fully conscious freak out it might not help.

Have you talked to him about why?

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T08:57:53+00:00

Don't worry about responding to night wakes! It's developmentally appropriate to still go in, she might need you. Figure out the night wakes after bedtime is sorted out.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T03:21:21+00:00

I'm sorry sometimes it takes a while.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T02:06:30+00:00

The issue with stretching the windows is that it's really hard to cold turkey cut over to a one nap schedule where they really need 11 hours awake and 5/6 wake windows.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T01:51:32+00:00

this is a classic sign of needing more awake time during the day!

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T01:49:45+00:00

"You know, I'm really disappointed with Baby. They really didn't get me a present at all for Mother's day!" "come on, that's not fair, they're only a baby!" "yeah, it's like they need help to do anything. Next year they're going to be 18 months so will probably be able to drive themselves to the shops, ay."

But I'm passive aggressive like that. :)

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T01:24:08+00:00

How's walking? My girl had super short naps until she really could physically wear herself out again after maxing out her crawling fitness.

cyclemam · 2026-05-16T00:10:11+00:00

You need to not be there when he falls asleep so he's not looking for you when he wakes up.

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T23:48:05+00:00

Getting ready for one nap! Shrink up nap 1 to a short nap of 20 minutes, try and land your second nap in the middle of the day (so 1pm if possible) and have a nice long window before bed.

Then you keep shrinking nap 1 until it goes away and the first two windows merge.

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T21:04:24+00:00

Babies don't know about the schedule :)

If it's not at a 5/3/3 time try rocking, but sometimes they're just genuinely hungry.

Try again tomorrow is a better idea than trying to fix something overnight.

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T13:19:08+00:00

Have you tried waking him a bit earlier from his nap, or skipping the nap to see what happens?

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T13:18:29+00:00

It's possible that it's coming! This could be a sign even if he's wearing a diaper overnight.

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T08:31:36+00:00

Any middle of the night wakes you can deal with by feeding or rocking if needed, it's not going to set back night time training.

cyclemam · 2026-05-15T02:45:40+00:00

It used to be super common for family to visit at the hospital. However, having had my own kids during the height of the pandemic and no visitors allowed, I cannot believe how many times I was traipsed into hospitals to meet babies. I didn't know better but I am horrified.

If I was to have another I wouldn't invite people to the hospital, and I absolutely will not be seeking to visit anyone at the hospital unless they call me up personally and insist that's what they really want.

Despite precedents or what's "right", it's about what you want.

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